[identity profile] nerdsexgoddess.livejournal.com
The following anonymous post appeared on the compy network.

For the purposes of curiosity...

If you want to play, let me know in a reply to this thread, and I will pick three people currently in attendance at Hogwarts.

Which would you have sex with?
Which would you marry?
Which would you kill, provided that there weren't a no-kill spell?


If anyone else wants to assign choices as well, that would be grand!


((Edited to fix the rules. The mun has never actually played this game herself.))
[identity profile] fw-darcy.livejournal.com
Fitzwilliam Darcy had been having a wonderful dream. He had wed his lovely Elizabeth and taken her away to Pemberley far, far from his new in-laws. She had become both mother and sister to Georgianna and helped heal the blow That Cad dealt his dear sister's heart. Bingley and Miss Jane were their frequent visitors; Miss Lydia Bennet had to be set down for some reason he couldn't quite remember, but Elizabeth, Jane and Georgianna between them had salvaged much of Miss Catherine Bennet's character through their kinship...

********POP!**********

Darcy awoke on a cold stone floor, clothing drenched in butter. He exclaimed in disgust and quickly shucked off his topcoat and blouse, which he then tried to use as a cleaning rag. Managing, of course, only to make matters worse (and slipperier).

He looked around the room, and recognized the heraldic tapestries on the wall. Ravenclaw. Gryffindor. This is Hogwarts. Darcy remembered being here before, but it all seemed as a dream, a dream that was fast slipping away from his mind...

((Hi ho! Laura Palmer-mun here, back at last from hiatus, and unpopping my exact same previous Mr. Darcy from the '95 P&P miniseries with Colin Firth. He remembers the Basic Hogwarts Setup but not much of his experiences here, since most of the chars he met before are popped now. For simplicity's sake we'll say this is chronologically well after Zombie Hunter Lizzy departs the Popcorn Room. Come say howdy to the poor mortified gent!))
[identity profile] cosmicteddy.livejournal.com
((Since Michael does need to meet some people... Here he is!))

Since Hogwarts was the type of school that saw teaching as more or less optional, while some of its students were of the studying kind, the library was a frequently frequented place. Michael wished he had the time to assist each and every student personally, but his... other line of work sadly prevented him from doing so. But now, at least, it seemed like the cosmos could manage without his involvement, so he could do something restful and human. He could stack some books, and maybe help some people find what they were looking for.  

His gaze went to the empty chair in the corner, where Matilda had used to sit. The little girl had become popcorn not long ago, and Michael noticed her absence more than expected. It was strange that such a small child, who hadn't really done much other than reading for hour on end, could leave such a hole. He knew, though, that whatever she had gone back to, she was going to be happy, and that was comfort enough. Michael was not the type of person to dwell on the negative; eternity was too long for that.  

So he was padding around the library in his perpetually wrinked suit, searching for people to help or perhaps treat to a cup of tea. And a pastry. Michael did love his pastries.
[identity profile] fields-4ever.livejournal.com
It started last week, when one of the house elves handed Fields a tube of lipstick and said it had her name on it, so here it was. Fields turned the tube over, and sure enough, on the bottom was stamped "Strawberry Field," a light mauve-pink.

"Oh no, this isn't mine," she said kindly. "It's just the name of the color. Could you please give it back to whomever it came from?" The house elf shrugged and wandered off.

The next morning the lipstick was by her door, along with a pint of strawberry ice cream. She put the ice cream back in the kitchen, but had no luck with the lipstick.

By the end of the week, she had strawberry body polish, matching soap, strawberry lemonade shower gel, three different shades of blush, four lipsticks, and a perfume called strawberry flowers. The ice cream had also returned, along with a box of strawberry cereal bars, and a package of shortcake with a recipe on the back. Fields posted signs in the common rooms and in the Great Hall with no luck. Finally, in desperation, she took all of her ill-gotten loot into the Great Hall and set up shop.

FREE TO A GOOD HOME

Fields sat down with a spoon for the ice cream and a stack of fashion magazines. If anybody claimed ownership of the stolen goods, she'd apologize at once. If somebody claimed ownership of the ice cream, not only would she apologize, but she'd buy them a new pint, too.
[identity profile] vampfashionista.livejournal.com
((Open RP, buuut mainly for happy reunion times with sparklehubby Jasper. The thread with him will automatically be the last one, but if you want your character to meet Alice you can comment wherever. Oh, and I've got permission for this.))

Alice's timing was, as always, impeccable.

She rather wished she wouldn't have to deal with the popcorn butter -- her blouse was beyond saving, and the smell would never wash out -- but she had anticipated it and was prepared. Her clothes would still be in her old room in Hufflepuff, and she still had some time before Jasper would be out of the Sorting Room. Being a seer was ever-so practical sometimes! She nearly danced her way through the corridors, timing it so that as few people as possible would see her with her clothes in the current state.

The room was as it should be, and her clothes were waiting. Alice quickly changed and washed her hair and face from remnants of butter and salt. It didn't take long. Sparklepires repel filth when it's not sexy.

There. Jasper should have gotten her note by now. Excellent! Alice smiled at herself in the mirror and then she was off again, skipping off back to the Popcorn Room. She seated herself outside, and crossed her legs daintily as she waited. Her husband would show up here soon, but in the meantime she absolutely wouldn't mind having someone to talk to.
[identity profile] c-macaulay.livejournal.com
Don't regret our ties / This endless flow / You take these fears / When you say they go / Your touch honey-smooth / Your shining calm / So what if blood's spilt / You're my light you're my balm )


(( OOC: There are two parts to this. One is the wedding bit itself, which will be played out by the principals in its own thread, which Camilla's account has already posted below.

The other is the reception/dinner afterward, and for that, feel free to start your own threads here. As S.A.R.A.H. decided, there isn't any assigned seating. Instead, there will be lots of round tables at which people can choose to seat themselves, eight chairs per table -- think of the more disorganized sort of awards banquet and you'll probably have a good idea. The house elves will bring people whatever kind of meal they prefer, with special instructions to bring Yoda a plate of nice twigs. Rather than one large cake there are tiered single-serving cakes in a variety of flavors, again at S.A.R.A.H.'s brilliant suggestion. [GJ, have we told you lately that we love you?]

Finally, characters who have not been invited can crash the reception. Just think of some reasonable explanation for why they've heard there's a wedding going on -- unless they're Homestar, who just sort of turns up places. ))
[identity profile] unbittenapple.livejournal.com
((OOC: I'm taking Bella from midway through New Moon, just after her dive. Spoilers reside within! Also, a note for any psychics; Bella's mind is somewhat impervious to any type of mind-reading or attempts to magically influence her.))

An girl in her late teens arrives abruptly in the Sorting room.
No surprise there, then.

I'm trying to figure out what you are. )
[identity profile] tourettesbunny.livejournal.com
((AKA: Open RP for the characters in the cluster; Demyx, Alice Cullen, Yoda, Dieter Prohl, Shibuya Yuuri, the Easter Bunny, Wolfram von Bielefeld, Jaime Lannister. And anybody else that feels like dropping by!))

The Easter Bunny was taking this entire random marriage thing in stride. Hey, pagans used to have much weirder little rituals, and they'd never provided sweet tent villages. All in all, this was pretty bitchin'.

And, as far as the rabbit was concerned, he'd gotten the best spot in the whole place. His tent and surrounding yard looked directly into the entrance of the Love Tunnel. Therefore, it was Party at the Easter Bunny's House.

Having set up a number of chairs outside his tent, the Easter Bunny (clad in a tophat with his ears poking through, and a rather narcissistic tie) stretched out on a chair and smoked a cigar, waving down everybody that was in his cluster of tents.

Maybe he should charge for Tunnel of Love perving opportunities.

((Attention: I feel obligated to warn everybody that Santa and the Easter Bunny are talking in this thread. You will be disturbed.))
[identity profile] ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com
One bright Hogwarts morning, fliers with small, numbered Hat-shaped plastic tokens are sent out to a select group of students via house elf. “Your presence is required at an Awards Ceremony in the Great Hall tonight,” the flier states. “Attendance is mandatory. Formal dress is required. Prizes will be given.”

And so, at the appointed time, the students are ushered into the Great Hall. It has been lavishly decorated for the occasion: streamers, flowers, a champagne fountain, the works. At the front of the hall sits the Sorting Hat, likewise decorated in a wreath of flowers and lots of bling. It sits imperiously and waits until everyone has taken a seat and the beautifully decorated doors have been closed and barred.

“My dear students,” it begins, “we are gathered here today for a wonderful ceremony. A ceremony of magic and beauty, and it is my privilege to be here with you. Now, before you can get your wonderful awards--” here one of the Hat's folds dips in what might have been a wink on something with a face--”are you all carrying your special prize tokens?” It waits for a little longer while the attending house elves (all carrying bouquets of multicolored flowers) check to ensure that yes, everyone in the room has one on their person. “Wonderful! By the power vested in me by the Board of Education, I now pronounce you married!”

Before the shock and outrage can set in, the Hat rushes into the next part of its speech. “No use getting upset, it's legal now! This place has become a haven for loose morals, and you're helping to fix that! Don't worry about your belongings, you won't have to spend a second sweating and becoming undesirable for your new spouses! While you've been here, the house elves have moved your sundries out to your new homes for you, isn't that nice of them? They've even been allowed to charm your new homes so that you can't remove your objects from them! Let's hear it for the house elves!” It doesn't pause for applause. “Now, I'll let you happy newlyweds get to the business of consummating your new relationships in the name of duck waffles procreation. Your tokens are numbered with your new addresses, and a map has been provided at the door. Don't try to run, the ushers have been provided with cattle prods and given the permission to use them.” The Hat waves a strap at one terrified-looking bouquet-holding elf near the front, who pulls a cattle prod out of the flowers and waves it around. “And now, onward! Onward to happy families! Onward to El Mundo Del Sombrero!

The doors open. The armed house elves swarm, herding the students to a tent village on Hogwarts grounds. Resistance is futile.

Once arriving at the tent whose number matches the number on their token, each student will meet his or her new spouse(s) ...



((The tents in El Mundo Del Sombrero are wizarding tents that appear to be one-bedroom houses complete with bathrooms, kitchens, living rooms, etc. inside. Rearranging and addition of objects is allowed, removal of objects for the purposes of moving elsewhere or returning to the castle is not due to the charm on the tents. Players are allowed to NPC the house elves shocking their own characters if an escape attempt is made. Note that characters will not be barred from returning to the castle later to do other things, e.g., use the library; they just can't move back into the castle. Congratulations on your nuptials.

Feel free to RP in this post, or to post your own separate posts that take place within the dubious sanctuary of your brand-new tent!))
[identity profile] alicevamp.livejournal.com
[[Approved by Edward-mun!]]

Alice Cullen was not ordinary in any sense of the word. She had short, black hair that would make any normal girl snicker. She was very small and pixie-like, and graceful in her movements, which would make any dancer green with envy. She had a family of very attractive ladies and gentlemen that made every normal person turn their heads to stare. Oh, and she was a vampire who had visions of the future from time to time. That, too.

Carlisle had sent her to look for Edward. After the family left Forks, he had disappeared to God-knows-where. Carlisle was the first one to hear the news about Edward living at Hogwarts, and immediately sent a very worried Alice to join him there. And the next morning, Alice Cullen arrived at Hogwarts to enroll herself.

She entered the Sorting Room at a brisk pace. She nearly sprinted across the room until she came upon the familiar three-legged stool that had a sheet of parchment and a quill on top. She picked up the sheet and scanned it quickly.

What kind of school asks you questions like these to get in?

She shrugged and scooped up the quill, eager to get these questions over with so she could find her brother



I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ____AC________
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them._____AC______.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. _____AC______.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. _____AC________"

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