Journey into Recovery ((Sock, RP, Kusuriyuri, Yukimura, Kuronue))

[edomedpeddler.livejournal.com]

What god-modding there is has been approved. Topic and action likely to wander to NSFW areas and possibly triggery.

It had taken him longer to recover than he expected, but Kusuriyuri had finally convinced Kurama that he was well enough to return to his office for the day. He had almost had to threaten his lover with wards to make Kurama go to the greenhouses. He was just finishing preparing to leave when there was a soft knock at the door. Frowning at the wards that thought about identifying the presence as Kuronue but wouldn't commit, Kusuriyuri opened the door, not surprised the knocker was Yukimura, though he was surprised to see the samurai.

"I am sorry to bother you so early," Yukimura said, bowing. "As well as at your home, but I have something I wish to speak with you about in private."

Kusuriyuri tilted his head and looked at Yukimura. A contented exhaustion overlayed a deeper sense of concern. He returned the bow and stepped back. "Please, come in. Good morning." He wondered how long Yukimura had been waiting to be sure Kurama had left for the day.

Yukimura smiled as he walked past the peddler, stepping out of his shoes easily before entering the main portion of the house. "Good morning and thank you for your indulgence."

Kusuriyuri led Yukimura to the living room and gestured for him to take a seat. He watched while the samurai knelt between the couch and the table. Kusuriyuri knelt opposite him and waited.

Boukensha crawled into Kusuriyuri's lap and Belophoebe sniffed at Yukimura before hopping up on the couch behind his head, turning to deliberately ignore him except for her tail that draped over his shoulder.

Yukimura reached up and brushed her tail, causing ti to twitch and then settle again on his shoulder. "First, I want to thank you for everything you have done for us, Kuronue and myself. Words only are not enough."

"You have done much for us, as well," Kusuriyuri murmured. He knew that Yukimura's relationship with Kurama and Kuronue helped the fox in many ways.

A smile crossed Yukimura's lips. "I also know that we are far more in your debt." He reached up and caressed Bel's tail, amusement in his features as her tail flicked around his neck, lingering, before settling on his shoulder again. His expression sobered as his hand settled in his lap. "And I am here to place myself more in your debt."

While it was expected, Kusuriyuri's eyebrow went up. "This one does not consider you in his debt," he said formally. "As to your request, this one is a medicine peddler."

"True, but as to whether what I ask is within your trade..." Yukimura protested, his hand coming up to caress Bel's tail again.

"Ease your mind, then, and make your request," Kusuriyuri suggested after watching Yukimura pet the cat's tail a long moment.

Sighing, Yukimura said, "It is a difficult thing, but Kuronue did agree to this." He looked at Kusuriyuri. "Kuronue is still having nightmares. He doesn't always recognize me when I try to soothe or wake him. While he has only snarled at me in his sleep, this is a newer development and I would not care to see it become worse."

Kusuriyuri bowed to Yukimura. "This is a difficult thing," he murmured.

Nodding, Yukimura continued, "And, neither of us is used to asking for help. But, I do not wish to have you obliged, either. I remember that thing Apos threw at you."

"Once this one's body accepted it, it has ceased to be a problem." Nor would it be one in the future with Apos trapped in the sinning tree.

"That is good to hear. I would not want you to come to permanent harm." There was genuine relief in the samurai's voice.

"What is it that you would ask of this one?" Kusuriyuri asked. "What you have said does sound as though it would be within the scope of a medicine peddler."

"It is more complex than that," Yukimura said carefully. "To allow himself to be open enough, he needs more than I am able to give him."

Kusuriyuri frowned slightly. "More?"

"Yes," Yukimura nodded. "Violence and sex are very closely tied in his mind. I tend to be more gentle unless he provokes me, and even then, I am not as harsh as he desires sometimes. But, when he receives such treatment, his mind is more open."

"Is that so?" Kusuriyuri murmured. "That may be why Akabane affected him so deeply."

A wry expression crossed Yukimura's face, his eyes hardening. "Perhaps, but we both would like him to reach a level of peace rather than just burying his heart again. I would rather he healed."

The image of Ro impinged on Kusuriyuri's mind. He'd kept his distance but he had seen how very weak and injured that part of Kuronue's mind had been. "Healing cannot be forced," he said carefully.

"I know. I also am aware that things between us may change. I also know that things may become worse before they improve." Yukimura held up his hand. "I trust and respect your judgement, both in regard to whether you'll accept and what you tell Kurama. If you will not, there will be nothing more spoken of this."

Kusuriyuri was silent a long moment, stroking Boukensha as he thought. "I would speak with Kuronue alone first," he said slowly. While he understood why Yukimura approached him—things between him and Kuronue were still somewhat awkward despite the recent changes in their relationship—he needed to know this was truly what Kuronue wanted, that he was prepared.

"Of course," Yukimura said. His eyes went unfocused for a moment and he rose. "He will be here soon," he said, bowing. "Thank you."

Kusuriyuri rose before returning the bow. "It is what is done," he said as Yukimura walked to the hall.

"By some," Yukimura said, turning as he stepped into his shoes. "Those who are indeed worthy of regard," he added with a bow, stepping out of the door.

Comments

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura held up a piece of meat, his hand under it, and offered it to Kuronue. "Here," he said, amusement rippling his voice. "Say 'ah'," he couldn't help but adding, laughter almost breaking through.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue made a face at Yukimura instead and leaned forward to take the meet, sucking on the chopsticks as he pulled back just to tease Yukimura as well. He chewed. "S'nice," he said, winking at him.

He pulled his miso soup closer, pulled the lid from the bowl and began to eat it, watching Yukimura from the corner of his eyes.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura chuckled, a touch of color on his cheeks. He turned his attention back to his food, his leg pressed against Kuronue's as he at, both habit and because it felt good to be in contact with his lover. He also drank liberally of the bottle of sake, finishing it about the same time he finished his meal. He sighed, content with the world, watching Kuronue.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

That blush was cute, made him grin.

Though, when he noted that Yukimura was finished both sake and food, he grumbled a little. "There's got to be some trick to how you're not drunk right now," he complained, finishing his miso soup and setting the bowl down.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

"I've never been drunk from sake," Yukimura asserted. "Now, rum, that I've been drunk from," he laughed. "It's useful to act drunk, sometimes," he added, winking. "It's gotten me information I needed and into places I normally couldn't have gotten 'sober.'" He tilted his head, a grin touching his lips. "I can drink anyone under the table, with sake."

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

"I wouldn't doubt that," Kuronue said, then smiled at Yukimura. He stood, tugged at Yukimura's arm. "Shall we go for that walk?"

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura rose, stepping over the bench easily and held his hand out for Kuronue. "You definitely need a walk," he said, amusement rippling through his voice. "You're starting to smell like our room."

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue snorted, stan "If I smell like anything it's you and Kusuriyuri right now. And cats. Fucking cats." Squeezing Yukimura's hand, he headed towards the door of the Great Hall.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

"Fucking cats? I didn't think that was your preference, but what do I know of demons?" Yukimura asked, the first managing to come out sounding almost genuinely shocked, the rest barely not laughing. He leaned closer to Kuronue and sniffed. "Spice," he said. "Is that what the peddler smells of?"

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue spluttered. "That--I didn't--You know that's not what I meant!" he shrieked, eyes flying wide.

Still a little flustered, he replied on autopilot. "He used a mixture of things, so it burned..." Oh, okay, now he was reeling a little. Being flung from one direction to the other in the space of a second almost made him trip over himself.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura squeezed Kuronue's fingers, laughing aloud. He pulled Kuronue closer and wrapped his arm. "Clear your head, tell me about the things the peddler used," he said through his laughter, leaning his head on Kuronue's arm.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue made a distressed whine, eyes still wide. Yukimura was warm against him, and his touch was nice. He focused on that, and it brought him out of the shock of things, instead settled him into his rather comfortable rut in the gutter. He licked his lips.

"He, uh...Scratched me," he said, remembering. The peddler's nails were long, they'd felt nice. "Nearly until I bled, and he rubbed oils that burned into them." Kuronue sighed, looking down at his feet as he walked. "I was worried, that if I went back to seeking pain out, that it would be like before, but it wasn't. I wasn't...ravenous for more, desperate to be in the state where everything else disappears. It was..." Looking up, Kuronue's eyes drifted off to the side, and he turned inside, thinking. It had been enlightening.

No offence to Yukimura, but he was glad that the first time he'd tried something like that had been with Kusuriyuri. Simply because the peddler seemed to know what was good, what was bad, and how to get Kuronue to accept, to help himself by admitting.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura listened, staying close to Kuronue's side. "I think that may be why he told you to be just with me for a while," he said softly. "To learn that what you want isn't bad and that you can still have things and they don't have to sweep you away." He sighed. "I think that I will indeed have much to thank the peddler for," he added, squeezing his arm tighter around Kuronue's body. "This is far beyond what I'd hoped for, to have you this happy, this content and fulfilled."

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

A smile that came purely from his (metaphorical) heart lit up Kuronue's face. He sighed. "It's beyond what I had hoped for too."

Turning his head, he kissed Yukimura's temple. When they stepped out onto the grounds he laid an arm over his shoulder. "I don't think we can thank him enough for what he's done. I don't know how...or where to begin..."

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

A wry smile crossed Yukimura's lips. "And, he will likely say 'it is what is done,' like always. That won't do. We will think of something, my love." Though, the value of anything they thought of was never likely to match the value of Kuronue's mind and sanity.

Yukimura looked up into the sky, mostly blue with a few clouds scattered about. "How far would you like to walk?" he asked. "Or did you want to spar or visit Hogsmead?"

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

"I like...that it's just the two of us." He nudged Yukimura a little. "I don't wan't to be around other people right now, just you. And, sorry, but I don't have my weapons on me." He looked out over the green hills, sighed.

"Let's find a hill and just...sit. Be."

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

For someone who never went without a sword, Yukimura was surprised that Kuronue was unarmed. He looked at him a moment then at the hill. "That would be nice," he agreed, starting that way. He then smiled. "How often do you want to be around others with me?" he teased.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

"Depends who those others are, dearheart," he said, chuckling. I can protect myself without weapons, if need be.

He'd come to the conclusion that, if Akabane appeared, either he wouldn't have any desire nor reason to attack Kuronue, and Kuronue would rather retreat than give in the the impulse that had faded to nigh obscurity that marked Akabane as someone who could hurt him real good, make him forget. He was wiser. Free, now.

"But, not often." Moving alongside Yukimura, he chuckled, tilting his head into the wind.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura could follow Kuronue's train of thought and it reassured him greatly, that Akabane couldn't tempt Kuronue now when he knew that he had before, even somewhat after the whole thing in the Shrieking Shack. "No, and it's not often you want to be outside with me, either," he teased. This new form of their relationship would take a little time to get used to, but he liked the way it was starting.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

"It doesn't...bore you?" he asked, turning to look at Yukimura. They had reached the hill, and beyond was Hogwarts, looming, the lake and Hogsmeade. Then the Scottish countryside. Rolling green pastures, occasional deeper green trees. It was beautiful.

Yukimura seemed so natural here, to Kuronue. Like it was just...just was. Taking both of Yukimura's hands, he sat, crossed his legs beneath him and looked up at Yukimura, waiting for him to join him.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Smiling and bending over Kuronue's hands a moment. "No," he said, turning as he sat so that their hands crossed over his head and he ended up against Kuronue's chest and their hands were across his body, "it doesn't bore me." He sighed, settling against his lover. "Do I bore you?" he asked.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue made a sharp, amused sound. "Never. I could stare at you for hours and still not be bored."

He shifted a little, pulling Yukimura a little more comfortably into his lap and then taking Yukimura's hands again. He tilted his head forward, taking a deep breath of the scents that were purely Yukimura. And other things, but yes, Yukimura.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

"You do say such very sweet things," Yukimura sighed, tilting his head aside enough to let Kuronue do as he wished. It caused him to smile, the way Kuronue was so visceral in his attentions, as though he needed to reassure every sense that he was there. This time, though, there was so much less desperation about the action and more simple joy of being together.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Indeed it was more of a want to be with Yukimura completely, to enjoy his smells, his warmth, to feel his love from the inside so easily, now that he could. They were connected, more as one than they had ever been. Dropping his head to Yukimura's shoulder and enjoying the light caress of the wind, the sound of the grass and trees swaying along with it.

It's how I feel, he said, not feeling like speaking aloud just then. I love you, will always love you.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura sighed, relaxing into Kuronue's body, enjoying what was around them. And I, you, he whispered back. Always, even if I forget, I will love you. I truly believe that, even if I forget you when I return to live out the rest of my life in my time, that I will remember you after and I will search for you in the afterlife. You hold a part of me and I don't think that will change when we return, though I do hope that is a very long time away.