Journey into Recovery ((Sock, RP, Kusuriyuri, Yukimura, Kuronue))

[edomedpeddler.livejournal.com]

What god-modding there is has been approved. Topic and action likely to wander to NSFW areas and possibly triggery.

It had taken him longer to recover than he expected, but Kusuriyuri had finally convinced Kurama that he was well enough to return to his office for the day. He had almost had to threaten his lover with wards to make Kurama go to the greenhouses. He was just finishing preparing to leave when there was a soft knock at the door. Frowning at the wards that thought about identifying the presence as Kuronue but wouldn't commit, Kusuriyuri opened the door, not surprised the knocker was Yukimura, though he was surprised to see the samurai.

"I am sorry to bother you so early," Yukimura said, bowing. "As well as at your home, but I have something I wish to speak with you about in private."

Kusuriyuri tilted his head and looked at Yukimura. A contented exhaustion overlayed a deeper sense of concern. He returned the bow and stepped back. "Please, come in. Good morning." He wondered how long Yukimura had been waiting to be sure Kurama had left for the day.

Yukimura smiled as he walked past the peddler, stepping out of his shoes easily before entering the main portion of the house. "Good morning and thank you for your indulgence."

Kusuriyuri led Yukimura to the living room and gestured for him to take a seat. He watched while the samurai knelt between the couch and the table. Kusuriyuri knelt opposite him and waited.

Boukensha crawled into Kusuriyuri's lap and Belophoebe sniffed at Yukimura before hopping up on the couch behind his head, turning to deliberately ignore him except for her tail that draped over his shoulder.

Yukimura reached up and brushed her tail, causing ti to twitch and then settle again on his shoulder. "First, I want to thank you for everything you have done for us, Kuronue and myself. Words only are not enough."

"You have done much for us, as well," Kusuriyuri murmured. He knew that Yukimura's relationship with Kurama and Kuronue helped the fox in many ways.

A smile crossed Yukimura's lips. "I also know that we are far more in your debt." He reached up and caressed Bel's tail, amusement in his features as her tail flicked around his neck, lingering, before settling on his shoulder again. His expression sobered as his hand settled in his lap. "And I am here to place myself more in your debt."

While it was expected, Kusuriyuri's eyebrow went up. "This one does not consider you in his debt," he said formally. "As to your request, this one is a medicine peddler."

"True, but as to whether what I ask is within your trade..." Yukimura protested, his hand coming up to caress Bel's tail again.

"Ease your mind, then, and make your request," Kusuriyuri suggested after watching Yukimura pet the cat's tail a long moment.

Sighing, Yukimura said, "It is a difficult thing, but Kuronue did agree to this." He looked at Kusuriyuri. "Kuronue is still having nightmares. He doesn't always recognize me when I try to soothe or wake him. While he has only snarled at me in his sleep, this is a newer development and I would not care to see it become worse."

Kusuriyuri bowed to Yukimura. "This is a difficult thing," he murmured.

Nodding, Yukimura continued, "And, neither of us is used to asking for help. But, I do not wish to have you obliged, either. I remember that thing Apos threw at you."

"Once this one's body accepted it, it has ceased to be a problem." Nor would it be one in the future with Apos trapped in the sinning tree.

"That is good to hear. I would not want you to come to permanent harm." There was genuine relief in the samurai's voice.

"What is it that you would ask of this one?" Kusuriyuri asked. "What you have said does sound as though it would be within the scope of a medicine peddler."

"It is more complex than that," Yukimura said carefully. "To allow himself to be open enough, he needs more than I am able to give him."

Kusuriyuri frowned slightly. "More?"

"Yes," Yukimura nodded. "Violence and sex are very closely tied in his mind. I tend to be more gentle unless he provokes me, and even then, I am not as harsh as he desires sometimes. But, when he receives such treatment, his mind is more open."

"Is that so?" Kusuriyuri murmured. "That may be why Akabane affected him so deeply."

A wry expression crossed Yukimura's face, his eyes hardening. "Perhaps, but we both would like him to reach a level of peace rather than just burying his heart again. I would rather he healed."

The image of Ro impinged on Kusuriyuri's mind. He'd kept his distance but he had seen how very weak and injured that part of Kuronue's mind had been. "Healing cannot be forced," he said carefully.

"I know. I also am aware that things between us may change. I also know that things may become worse before they improve." Yukimura held up his hand. "I trust and respect your judgement, both in regard to whether you'll accept and what you tell Kurama. If you will not, there will be nothing more spoken of this."

Kusuriyuri was silent a long moment, stroking Boukensha as he thought. "I would speak with Kuronue alone first," he said slowly. While he understood why Yukimura approached him—things between him and Kuronue were still somewhat awkward despite the recent changes in their relationship—he needed to know this was truly what Kuronue wanted, that he was prepared.

"Of course," Yukimura said. His eyes went unfocused for a moment and he rose. "He will be here soon," he said, bowing. "Thank you."

Kusuriyuri rose before returning the bow. "It is what is done," he said as Yukimura walked to the hall.

"By some," Yukimura said, turning as he stepped into his shoes. "Those who are indeed worthy of regard," he added with a bow, stepping out of the door.

Comments

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Humming in agreement through the kiss, Kuronue still kept his fingers working the more oily conditioner through Yukimura's hair, massaging lightly.

"Spoilt," he teased.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

"Indeed," Yukimura agreed, amusement in his voice. "Let's finish and sit in the bath for a while," he suggested, tilting his head a little as though to lean it against Kuronu's shoulder but not quite because he still had conditioner in his hair. "The girls will be up soon, if Mame-chan isn't already."

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue made a small sounds, suspiciously like a coo, and pushed Yukimura's head back again. Gently he rinsed Yukimura's hair, running his hands through it to be sure all of the conditioner was gone.

After he tipped Yukimura's head up and kissed him lightly. "Alright."

He turned the tap off, he pushed at Yukimura lightly, urging him to the heated water with a bit of glee. A nice soak would be relaxing.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura did laugh a little at Kuronue. "Excited to be in the bath or that Mame-chan will be up when we leave this room?" he teased even as he followed Kuronue into the bath. It was a little cooler than normal, but not close to cold yet, nice for the summer.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

"In the bath with you, naturally," he said, tone sickly sweet. It was true though.

While he was always happy to be around Mamechiho, he rather liked his time with Yukimura in baths. It was their time. The day before had been quite possibly one of the more memorable days of his life, and he wanted to let it all sink in.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura laughed. "Of course," he said, snuggling against Kuronue once they both sat. It was a narrower tub than they had at home, but long enough for them to both let their legs stretch out. He turned a little, feeling the need to be a little closer to his lover, needing to cuddle a little longer. It still feels so new to have this, the ability to be close, to have you satisfied, to know that your mind is healing, he said. Do not apologize, he added before Kuronue could say anything. I just...want to savor it.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue wrapped his arms around Yukimura and almost purred. He was very pleased for the moment, almost beyond elated. He burried his face in Yukimura's sodden hair and smiled gently, sighing as he let himself relax.

I want to savour it as well, before it becomes something I take for granted. If he ever did. Which, Kuronue suspected, he might. Only because he enjoyed it so much, however. It was a much better mindstate to be in.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Do...Ro, he is healing, yes? Yukimura asked softly, holding Kuronue's arm. He curled up, wanting to be as close as he could to his lover. And, Kuroi, the little one, all of you? He paused. Do you think, one day, that the five will be one?

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

It was a difficult question to answer since they were him and he hadn't been aware he'd segregated his mind in such a way in the first place. Thinking on it, he rubbed his cheek against Yukimura's head, silent for a while.

I think so. Maybe. I don't think I'll ever be quite normal, but maybe they won't disagree with each other. Maybe they'll all be happy, and their environment will be nicer.

That was one thing he remembered of being inside himself when Yukimura visited. Like watching through multiple screens, each one a different person, he saw the scorched earth and felt the resentment, distrust and fear they held for one another. Love and understanding was a far off thing, segregated to Kuroi and the child. But they were both wishful thinking, and Ni was just pure scattered thoughts, whatever was leftover. the barren part of his soul that had never been fulfilled throughout his life.

A trip back to see...might be...nice. He thought that it might be an interesting idea to have Yukimura accompany him to see Kusuriyuri as well.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura held Kuronue's arm, keeping his lover close, being with him. I should have asked later, he said gently. I didn't mean to cause you worry, but I have been wondering and the question came out before I truly thought of it, he whispered, sighing. I would be honoured, if you desire, he added. While he wasn't apologizing for the question itself, he hadn't really meant to ask while Kuronue was still somewhat basking in their activities of the day before.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

It's okay, he soothed, tilted his head and kissing Yukimura's temple. He shifted his wings and settled against the back of the ofuro, shifted to be more comfortable as he let his head rest back and closed his eyes. You don't have to hide those kinds of things from me love, no matter what kind of mood I'm in.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura sighed, smiling a little as he moved with Kuronue. I do want you to savor yesterday, though, he teased. To fix it in your mind. His hand moved to caress Kuronue's side. To know I love you, so very much, he added, pressing his lips to Kuronue's chest.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

I know, he said. I am savouring it. Thank you for letting me do that. Thank you for being so supportive.

Squeezing Yukimura a little, Kuronue sighed.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

His voice rippling with amusement, Yukimura said, It's what is done.

He rested against Kuronue's chest until he could smell food cooking and hear the soft sounds of the girls talking. He was sure that Kuronue could hear more than he could. "Breakfast?" he whispered, not moving just yet.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

He gave a non-committal hum and sighed. "Yeah," he whispered in return, not wanting to speak too loud. Slowly, he unwrapped his arms from Yukimura and made to sit up.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

"Or, you could turn into a fish," Yukimura added, teasing as he moved to his knees, lifting himself to his feet, his hands resting on the sides of the tub. He brushed a kiss over Kuronue's lips. "I will eat, though," he said sweetly, moving to step out of the tub.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

"Hm, fins would clash with the wings, I think," he said, leaning after that kiss. He stood and followed Yukimura, spent a moment hunting for towels they could use and then handed one to Yukimura.

He dried Yukimura with the towel he'd kept for himself, still smiling a little.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura laughed a little. When he could, he flipped the towel Kuronue gave him up over Kuronue's hair and began drying it. "And gills might get in the way, especially here," he said, touching Kuronue's neck with the towel over his fingers.

There was a tap at the door and Mame-chan's voice came through. "I have yukata for you. Your clothes are being washed."

"Shall we ask her in?" Yukimura asked, looking at Kuronue.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue shivered a little, that touch to his mark sensitive even though it was the towel touching him and not Yukimura. His body reacted to the energy more than anything, he thought. Drying Yukimura's back and shoulders he thought about it for a moment.

"Okay," he said, smiling a little.

He turned his head to look at the door though, eyes a little wide. "You didn't put my pants in the washing machine did you?" He wasn't entirely sure he was using the right words for the washing machine but he knew well enough that if she had thrown it in the thing that most humans used to clean their clothes it would have ruined the leather.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura drew the towel down to Kuronue's shoulders and worked on the upper portion base of his wings.

"No, Kuronue-sama," Mame-chan said softly, setting the yukata on a counter and picking up another towel. She was dressed in a fairly simple kimono herself, though her obi fit her status. She picked up another towel and moved behind Kuronue and began drying below his wings. "Kanae knows someone who is able to clean those and is doing so. They should be ready in about an hour."

Yukimura's voice rippled with amusement as he said, "It is only proper for a geisha to know the proper care of clothing."

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Dear gods, what were they doing to him.

His hair was still a little damp, dripping at the very ends, and they were both working the towels against his skin--his wings--in a way that he had only ever felt with Yukimura. To have both of them do so actually made him blush a little, as if it wasn't just a little ego boosting to hear Mamechiho address him with 'sama', to take to caring for him so quickly not only because he paid her, but because she, maybe, even liked him. No one had ever done so. Ever. It was always the other way around.

"Thank you," he said, looking at Yukimura and then over his shoulder to Mamechiho. "Did you like your gifts?" he asked, voice a little husky.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

"Very much, as I told you last night," Mame-chan said, smiling at Kuronue. "But, you went to sleep again quickly, so you might not remember."

She is fond of you, Yukimura said softly. "I remember," he said.

"Ah, truly, Yukimura-san?" she asked, her voice awed.

"Indeed, you brought us tea and we spoke briefly, then Kuronue moved us so that I was on his chest, and I fell asleep again after you told us to rest more."

"You do remember," Mame-chan said.

Yukimura moved his towel to Kuronue's hair. "I'm sure Kuronue-sama remembers, too," he said.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

He was trying to sort suspicion from the rut of thinking that others always had reasons for liking him. Only this time it wasn't about sex, but the kimono and other gifts he gave her. He was struggling enough that he couldn't quite contribute to their conversation as well as he hoped.

Lapse in memory was a consequence.

Kuronue looked at Yukimura, reached to tilt his lover's head up. Are you sure? Am I not just someone she's in debt to, and must treat kindly because I pay her in goods?

"Ah," he said aloud, eyes a little glazed. "I apologise." The husky tone had turned a little hoarse, almost hurt, or like he couldn't breathe. Was this relapse?

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura let the towel fall around Kuroue's shoulders, taking his lover's cheeks in his hands. I am sure. I've seen her with other clients, those who pay for her time often, but are not her danna, are not you. She treats them kindly, but you, she goes out of her way to be with. "Mame-chan, did your Okaasan give you problems about our time?" he asked.

Mamechiho blushed a little. "She was not pleased when I told her I wished to be with Kuronue-sama as long as he was here. But, I have missed Kuronue-sama, so I insisted," she said.

"The others, do you miss them?" Yukimura asked.

"Others? Other than the two of you?" She paused, blushing a little more. "They are just clients. They only receive what time they pay for," she admitted softly.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue stood, a little wide eyed. He took a deep breath, almost a gasp. It was raspy and thick. "But-..." But-...

There were so many 'but's he couldn't really say them. Besides, he'd paid for this hadn't he? He'd just given her two kimono worth more than a night's pay, more than all of the girls who had been here with them pay too.

His hands were shaking, and so he gripped at the towel that had slipped to cradle Yukimura's waist.

"Am I...worthy of being called Kuronue-sama...?" It almost sounded like a foreign name. "I have...come from the worst--of places." He was swapping between languages, though in his mind he was speaking Japanese. In the end all it is is lies. In the end the world is driven by one thing, and one thing only. This human society, it's crawling with it. Most of the customers he'd had in the whorehouse--that spot of mould--were humans after all.

"Demons, might be tough---But humans--are crueller..."