Application for Soris Tabris (Dragon Age: Origins)

[soris-tabris.livejournal.com]

 Soris came through a small, wooden door, very, very confused. He had been going into the marketplace to sell a few things-- and upon walking out the front door to his home had ended up here.

"Shianni? Look, this isn't funny. Kallian?" His cousin was Warden-Commander and hero of Fereldan, sure, but for her to gather all these resources just to play a trick on him seemed unlike her.

"All right, this is too strange. Somebody needs to explain what's going on..."

And that's when he saw the parchment sitting on the desk in the middle of the room.

State your full name.
Soris looked a little nervous. “I, uh... Soris Tabris.”
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
“Well, if we're really lucky, we can buy some of the nicer stuff from the Denerim marketplace. But, uh, we don't get lucky very often.”
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
“I'm not... I don't...” It actually takes a moment for the young elf to compose himself before he speaks again. “I don't do that anymore. If they hurt my family, though, I'd do it.”
3. What time is it where you are?
Soris glances about the room, looking out the window. “I think it's still morning. It's still kind of light out.”
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
“I wouldn't dare,” said Soris, visibly angry. “it's... a very sensitive subject. Ask the next question.”
5. If you are pushing to be in:

A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
“Uh... The, uh...” Soris ponders for a long while. “The Kidnapped Bridesmaid? Because it sounds witty in retrospect but was horrible at the time... Dear Maker, I'm not good at being witty.”
B. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
“He should end up with someone he loves. I mean, I'm no theologian, but the Maker is very big on love.” Soris looked at his answer askance, praying that they would accept what he'd offered.
C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I'm constantly disposing of it.
“Well, try putting lots of stuff on the desk so that there's nowhere to put the paperwork,” the young elf offered hopefully. He was smart, for someone who hadn't been given much schooling outside of ancient elven history, reading, and combat training.
D. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.
“I, uh... I killed Vaughan Urien. I'm not really proud of it, but I killed him.” He paused. “I mean, my cousin was there, but I landed the final blow. She just sorta killed the other two guys. But it was Vaughan we were after!”
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
I, uh, I can give you these!” Soris pulled a small package out of his backpack-- his wedding clothes, which he had been planning to sell. “They're really nicely made. The whole alienage chipped in.”

"I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ___Soris_____
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. ___Soris___.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. ___Soris___.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. __Soris___"

Comments

[boomerwangfire.livejournal.com]

"Well... yeah, but you don't say that! Offer to teach someone to do something, or something else useless like that that you don't have to give away. Family stuff is important." Even though it was warm here now, he wouldn't have given away his coat for anything. It meant home.

Also nobody had asked him to give anything away when he woke up covered in butter here. Which was good, because... what was he gonna do give away grease? He could have taught how to throw a boomerang, he supposed, but...

"Anyway, it won't do your family any good if you're giving it away for free here."

[soris-tabris.livejournal.com]

"No, really. I have that, a backpack to carry it in, and the clothes I'm wearing. I suppose I could teach some ancient elven history. That or the little bit of swordplay I learned from my aunt Adaia." He looked a little uncomfortable. How was he going to help provide for his family now? What would they think, now that he was gone? Things were suddenly a lot more real to him.

"Do I even get to tell them where I am?"

[boomerwangfire.livejournal.com]

Oh, great. Now he was making this guy feel bad, which made him feel bad. Sokka was a simple guy, compared to... okay, a lot of people that he knew, and as a rule he didn't like to go around deliberately making people feel worse about themselves. And if he was going to be completely honest with the elf-guy, nobody was going to be feeling exactly great any time soon. He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.

"Look, I'm really not trying to make you feel dumb or anything. I'm trying to help. You seem like a pretty decent person, and if that stuff means a lot to you or your family, I really wouldn't want to see someone take it from you just because they can. I've seen enough of that. Not here, now that I think about it, but... you know. Other places." He coughed. "Idon'tknowifyougettogohomeagain." He coughed again. It didn't hide the statement very well.

[soris-tabris.livejournal.com]

"Hey, it's okay. I'm not insulted, really. I could teach people some things, I'm sure--"

Wait.

Didn't get to go home?

"But... What about Kallian? About Shianni? I'm just... stuck here?" It was a little nerve-wracking, yes, but Soris' first instinct wasn't to be brave and put up with it. He was scared shitless, though he thought of what Kallian might do in this situation and took a deep breath.

"Maybe I can... Maybe I can find a way home. Or find some way to be useful here."

[boomerwangfire.livejournal.com]

"Yeah. You say you're not insulted. I say I probably could have worded all that a lot better."

He shrugged, uncomfortably. "I don't know. There's a lot of people back home I'm worried about, too. My sister, my dad, Gran-Gran, my girlfriend, a lot of friends... just because the war's officially over doesn't mean that things are going to be safe for any of them. But you really can't let yourself worry about that or it'll drive you crazy. Just... I don't know, take things as they come here. It's easy most days. There's a guy here with weird ears (http://hogwarts-hocus.livejournal.com/1939570.html?thread=109145458#t109145458). Not like your ears," he rushed to add. "More like..." he stuck up a finger on each side of his head straight up and wiggled them, to show what he meant. "And he had a tail."

[soris-tabris.livejournal.com]

A tail? He sounded like the old stories his Uncle Cyrion used to tell him about Abominations. They were frightening, almost like people, but not quite. Warped, one could say.

"Hey, we'll figure something out, right? Just because we're here doesn't mean we're stuck. We can do this," he said, mostly reassuring himself, "and if not, well... we'll find some way to make do with the lives we have."

Vote: Gryffindor

[boomerwangfire.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, that's the spirit," Sokka said, a lot more enthusiastically than he really felt, because Katara wasn't here to be optimistic and go-team-go and all that other stuff that he made fun of her for. "You just... go make a life! Here! In... Gryffindor. That's the kind of attitude we need there."

Re: Vote: Gryffindor

[soris-tabris.livejournal.com]

"Gryffindor? As in real griffons? I thought they were--"

Extinct? They were back home, sure, but this was different. Soris grinned.

"I'll be glad to join up with you. Hopefully we'll be able to do this place some good."

Re: Vote: Gryffindor

[boomerwangfire.livejournal.com]

"Real what huh?" Sokka asked blankly.

Re: Vote: Gryffindor

[soris-tabris.livejournal.com]

"I, uh. Sorry. Griffons only exist in fairy tales," he said, catching himself. "They're what the Grey Wardens rode into battle-- giant winged creatures that were part eagle and part lion." He stopped again. "Grey Wardens are legendary warriors, where I'm from. There's a lot of stuff that won't make much sense, I'm afraid," he said, pretty sure they weren't in Thedas any more.

Re: Vote: Gryffindor

[boomerwangfire.livejournal.com]

"Oh, so like a lion vulture (http://avatar.wikia.com/wiki/Lion_Vulture), except eagle-er." He nodded in understanding. "Yeah, we have those back home. Except I've never seen anyone ride on them."

He shrugged. "I'm pretty sure a lot of stuff I say about where I come from wouldn't make sense to you, so we're even."

Re: Vote: Gryffindor

[soris-tabris.livejournal.com]

"Fine by me," Soris said, grinning. "So... what's there to do around here? I expect after this Sorting's over I'll need some way to occupy my time."

Re: Vote: Gryffindor

[boomerwangfire.livejournal.com]

"Well, there's, uh..." Sokka thought back on what he'd been doing during his time here. "There's parties sometimes. With lots of food. Really good food." He looked dreamy for a minute. "And I heard something about classes but eh. I've never been to any."