hh_mirror | ::Open RP : Spring Specials at the Little Green Apple::

Matt laughs. "Fuck, that's right! You spoken to any of them yet?"

"One. But he wandered off mid conversation, and I have not tried my luck again since."

Paintings can be flighty things.

"I spoke to a couple, when I was trying to find that room again. They seemed a bit... put out? By the way the school is now."

Which is fair enough, really, with people turning up out of nowhere from different worlds or points in time or after death. Weird way to run a school.

"I would be. We are not very gracious guests. What with the public sex and the fighting in the halls."

He'd kick them out, if it were him.

Matt laughs. "Yeah, if you put it that way..." He's pleased to notice that it is a bit easier just to laugh about the whole thing. It was kind of ridiculous, after all.

L thinks it's funny as fuck. He's just trying to be quiet about it, for argument's sake. But he has had just enough lambic that it is not really a concern.

"And wandering about chatting at the crack of dawn."

"Anyone who complains about that can go fuck themselves."

He's smiling as he says it, but he means it.

"I have never understood the logistics of that expression."

Because how?

"I think..." He considers. "It just sounds... huh. I see what you mean." Another moment of contemplation. "Maybe it assumes people are really fucking flexible?"

"Flexible is one thing. Flexible is manageable."

But that's just awkward.

"Maybe the full phrase is 'go fuck yourself with a foreign object of some sort' but it gets shortened it for impact?"

"Oh."

This makes a good deal more sense.

"Oh, look. A painting. Should we try?"

Pleased they've gotten to the bottom of yet another mystery, Matt nods.

"Uh - painting? Could you tell us how to find the kitchens?"

The monk, who looks somewhat austere, points gravely to the left, and explains the procedure with the fruit bowl.

L is rather pleased that he called it. They really might have wandered forever, and this way there shall be cake.

Matt probably would have been fine with more random wandering, but then, he's not really into cake.

He thanks the monk and continues down the way with L. "What kind of cake are you hoping for, anyway? Or just anything?"

"Cheesecake."

It has been too long since these two were parted (L, and the cheesecake.)

"I know you do not like it, but since it is my birthday cake, I get to insist that you try a little."

"Yeah, alright. We could probably find candles, too..."

To be honest, they could probably get the house-elves to bring them an actual birthday cake.

"We might steal them from wall fixtures."

If they wanted to be resourceful about it.

"They'd be a bit big to put on the cake, though. Unless we just put them around it."

"That could work. I have never understood the appeal of many candles, anyways. I want cake, not to be lit on fire. I do not need obstacles between myself and it."

All a bit pointless, really.

"You can't wish on cake," Matt points out. "Well, you probably could, but I don't think it's so much of a tradition."

"That is true. Although I am not really the wish-upon-candles type."

They are things to conquer, rather than things to wish on.

"I always wished for presents. It worked every time," Matt snickers.

And there's the painting of the fruit bowl! "Okay, so we... tickle the pear?"

Hogwarts is weird.

"You can."

In case it, you know, bites or anything.

"Thanks," Matt says, dryly.

All that happens is that the pear giggles and turns into a door handle. He pulls it open and peers inside.

"... whoa. The kitchen is HUGE."

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