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Ryuuji: Welcome, one and all, to the first ever themed edition of WART! Stephen and I are going to your hosts for tonight, and we've decided to make the show revolve around Potions and Evil Clowns -- or more specifically, the repelling and hunting down of Evil Clowns. First, before you do anything, get your shot glasses out and make some Evil Clown Repellant to chug down while you listen to the show. Stephen and I have already taken a shot each, and we'll be taking a shot before each song played, just for luck. Stephen, would you do the honors of reading out the recipe for Evil Clown Repellent Red?

Stephen: *clears throat and intones solemnly* To make Evil Clown Repellent Red, you will need six ounces of spirits -- vodka works quite well -- six ounces of water, and three ounces of powdered animal hoof that has been colored red and has some sort of flavor associated with the concept of redness. In a clean cauldron, boil the water together with the spirits. Carefully add the powdered animal hoof and be sure to blend it thoroughly, else there will be unappealing lumps, and the effectiveness against clowns will suffer.

Pour the resulting mixture into small cups and give it to the house elf to put somewhere cool, God knows where they put things around here. Then have the house elf bring it back when it has become sort of congealed.

Ingest with courage and zeal!

( And so, the fun begins. )