[identity profile] ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] hh_mirror
The Sorting Hat had been dabbling in way too many fringe philosophies. (Neo-Rosicrucianism? Really, Sorting Hat?) It seemed that puppet!Ron Weasley's name for it, Sorting Hat the Wise, had gone to the Hat's lack-of-visible-head.

On the morning of Dec. 13 (or was it the 14th?) the Hat's esoteric interests affected the school for the second time.

The first instance had been more than a year past, when the Hat took a cue from Rev. Sun Myung Moon and united most of the Hogwarts students in mass marriages. That had been a lengthy and concerted effort by the Hat and its house-elf minions, opposed vigorously by the wicked (or noble??) Kojiro. Kojiro's kidnapping of the Hat's bride had been something of a turning point for the headstrong headgear.

This new instance ... even Kojiro might be powerless to counter. And the Hat's agency would be difficult, if not impossible, to discern.

In a mighty magical working, the Hat projected many of the students ... to the astral plane, in their astral forms.

Astral Hogwarts resembled the real material Hogwarts (well, the Sorting Hat's version of material Hogwarts) very closely indeed. There were some dissimilarities: did Hogwarts, on the material plane, really sparkle so much? Were there so many rainbows in the sky, without a hint of rain to prompt their presence? Were there really pastel-colored unicorns frolicking on the grounds? Unicorns with hair made of cotton candy?

Could the students fly without brooms in material Hogwarts?

Other than that, it would be instantly recognizable as Hogwarts. The astral students would find nothing jarringly unfamiliar, being astral themselves. No disorientation, as there had been with the mass weddings; only a pleasant surprise, if they did happen to remember the absence of pastel unicorns and self-propelled flight.

Finally the Hat would have achieved paradise! Too bad not all the students could be brought into this happy realm. The Hat hadn't quite figured out how to bring everyone en masse. But many of them could be.

Including Kojiro, perhaps ...


(( OOC note: People are welcome to RP astral shenanigans here, or to start their own new posts for interactions of a closed variety. Please, if you embark on NSFW action, make a new post so that it can be lj-cut with appropriate warnings. ))

Date: 2008-12-15 12:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wh0-kill3d-m3.livejournal.com
Roaming around Hogwarts on the Astral Plane felt different from the Black Lodge to Laura.

It felt...hot. It felt like she felt on cocaine, only better! No jitters, and no crashy aftereffects.

It made her feel like...getting into trouble. Preferably sexy trouble.

Date: 2008-12-15 01:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lemondrop-party.livejournal.com
Dumbledore bopped along, enjoying the astral vibes. It was a beautiful day at Hogwarts, as always!

"Pardon me, miss! May I borrow a cup of expired gorilla milk (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B77MxjIWixk)?"

Date: 2008-12-15 01:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wh0-kill3d-m3.livejournal.com
Astral Laura looked confused. Puppet kinkiness she'd run into before, but - gorilla milk?

"Um, I don't think so. What would you want to be doing with that?"

Because she's all up ons the new kinks!

Date: 2008-12-15 01:50 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lemondrop-party.livejournal.com
"It is one of many wizard liquids and enchanted juices! Works a treat on sluggish bowels!" the old puppet cackled.

Date: 2008-12-15 02:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wh0-kill3d-m3.livejournal.com
"Okay, whatever floats your boat," Laura said cheerfully. "But I haven't got any, sorry. Have you tried the Potions dude? Or the elves?"

Date: 2008-12-15 02:58 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lemondrop-party.livejournal.com
"My boat doesn't float! It's all caulked up! That is why I need gorilla milk!" Dumbledore wobbled to and fro. "The potions master doesn't stock it. Silly man!"

((reposted for icon))

Date: 2008-12-15 03:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wh0-kill3d-m3.livejournal.com
"Bummer, dude. I know how it is when you can't get to your stash." She bit her lip and tried to think. It was hard; she was feeling much blonder today than usual...

"This is Hogwarts. There's gotta be a gorilla around here somewhere, hasn't there?"

Date: 2008-12-15 03:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lemondrop-party.livejournal.com
Dumbledore glanced about -- by swiveling his entire body from side to side. His floppy arms wrapped and unwrapped about the cylinder of his torso. It looked a little dangerous.

"I don't see any! I only see unicorns. Silly unicorns!"

Date: 2008-12-15 03:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wh0-kill3d-m3.livejournal.com
She frowned. Blondely. "Do unicorns have milk? I wonder what unicorn milk does..." in bed, is the unspoken addition.

Date: 2008-12-15 03:10 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lemondrop-party.livejournal.com
"Let's milk one and find out!" Did Dumbledore realize that was sort of wrong? Probably not. The man routinely stripped off all his clothes and danced around in the presence of his students. Milking a unicorn was relatively innocent.

Date: 2008-12-15 03:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wh0-kill3d-m3.livejournal.com
"Okay!"

Because maybe it's narcotic and/or addictive, and besides, she needs to keep her wrists limber!

Date: 2008-12-15 01:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ra-tilt-chimera.livejournal.com
Trouble was something dark, mysterious figures were good at. Especially sexy trouble.

Of course, Zel was pretending to be too busy brooding to notice Laura's approach.

Date: 2008-12-16 04:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wh0-kill3d-m3.livejournal.com
"Well, hello there, tall dark and broody," she purred. "You look like you need to relax maybe?"

Date: 2008-12-16 01:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ra-tilt-chimera.livejournal.com
Zel smiled coyly. "Perhaps~ You offering to help?"

Date: 2008-12-18 05:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wh0-kill3d-m3.livejournal.com
"I could be," Laura said. "I'm feeling all...hot and bothered...today myself. Think you can help me with that?"

Date: 2008-12-18 01:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ra-tilt-chimera.livejournal.com
Zel stepped a little closer. "I suppose I could~"

Date: 2008-12-19 02:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wh0-kill3d-m3.livejournal.com
"Welllllll, you know anyplace we could go to...blow off a little steam?" she drawled.

Date: 2008-12-19 03:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ra-tilt-chimera.livejournal.com
Zel pretended to think deeply for a moment. "That depends on just how... steamed up you're feeling. If it's urgent, we can certainly find somewhere close~"

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