I move over a bit. "With Near? Yeah. I never thought I could be or would be, but we really do balance each other very well. I feel safe with him, in a different way than I feel safe with you, but..." I trail off and stare at the wall. "I need him," I say softly. "I need him to keep from making an ass of myself and I don't want to leave him." I look at Matt. "Now you think I'm a sap, don't you? But, after our last practice, I talked to L, you know that and then I talked to Near. I was pissed that you didn't understand and weren't listening to me. You know how I get when I'm pissed. Near talked me out of going to find you again and talking sense into you." I grin at him a little, "Which turned out to be a very good thing for you."
"You are a total sap, man," Matt says solemnly, taking another hit and flopping down onto the bed. "But, are you telling me to write Near a thank-you note or something?"
I slouch against the pillows, relaxing and grab the pipe for another hit. "Write him if you want. He might get a kick out of it."
I stretch my legs out so they're over his. That's what he gets if he's gonna lay down. "I knew I was in love with him because I wanted to be with him and he broke through my defenses, or I let him through, or both. I wanted him to love me, too. It mattered to me that I was on his good side. Still does."
"It is. I mean, we're all raised to rely on ourselves and on our brains and shit like that, and here comes love and throws that all out the window with emotion and messed up shit like that." Fuck, I'm eloquent when stoned.
"Hey, if you want, tell him he can come over and we'll share. And L, too." I laugh at the thought.
"Oh, yeah, because you're totally unemotional and collected. Always have been. Only Near's insane passion could burst through those cold walls of intellect."
Matt can't stop snickering, suddenly. He takes another hit and starts writing his note.
"But you're right, man. It's fucked up. Not bad fucked-up, like when your adblock goes to shit and your FPS fucking freezes right in the middle of the boss fight. Just... fucked up."
I try not to but I start laughing too. "That analogy is fucked up. Adblock going to shit is nothing like your whole system going to shit, ass. And, yeah fine, probably the other way around, but, you get my meaning or do I have to spell it out for you?" I swear, I'll spell at him if he asks for it. The thought makes me snicker.
"No, fuck you," Matt grins, pulling himself from the bed to answer. He manages to smile even wider when he see who it is. And immediately pulls L into a hug.
Near's not entirely sure what to make of Matt's owl, but in a few minutes he's knocking on his door anyway, because the idea of it makes his eyebrows shoot up.
That, and if Mello really is stoned, it just might be amusing.
"No," I giggle. "Matt and me did. He got good stuff from the only guy I'd ever get weed from. You should try it." I pull him him in the room and kick the door closed.
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Date: 2008-05-11 09:52 pm (UTC)He nudges at Mello, trying to get some room so he can flop down too.
"So, hey. You are happy, right?"
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Date: 2008-05-11 10:01 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-11 10:17 pm (UTC)He grins back. It really is very good pot.
"How'd you know you were in love with him?"
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Date: 2008-05-11 10:22 pm (UTC)I stretch my legs out so they're over his. That's what he gets if he's gonna lay down. "I knew I was in love with him because I wanted to be with him and he broke through my defenses, or I let him through, or both. I wanted him to love me, too. It mattered to me that I was on his good side. Still does."
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Date: 2008-05-11 10:27 pm (UTC)"Dunno if I had any... like, defenses. But holy shit, man, I love him. It's fucking weird."
He's reaching to the bedside table for a pen and paper. (Yes, he really is going to write to Near.)
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Date: 2008-05-11 10:31 pm (UTC)"Hey, if you want, tell him he can come over and we'll share. And L, too." I laugh at the thought.
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Date: 2008-05-11 10:38 pm (UTC)Matt can't stop snickering, suddenly. He takes another hit and starts writing his note.
"But you're right, man. It's fucked up. Not bad fucked-up, like when your adblock goes to shit and your FPS fucking freezes right in the middle of the boss fight. Just... fucked up."
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Date: 2008-05-11 10:46 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-11 10:58 pm (UTC)He isn't entirely sure what the fuck they're talking about, but it's funny. So that's alright.
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Date: 2008-05-11 10:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-11 11:10 pm (UTC)Mello's laugh is apparently pretty infectious, because before he knows it Matt can't stop laughing either.
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Date: 2008-05-11 11:12 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-11 11:22 pm (UTC)Knock knock. He can hear the laughter from the hall.
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Date: 2008-05-11 11:27 pm (UTC)"Hey," he says, nuzzling into L's neck.
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Date: 2008-05-11 11:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-11 11:44 pm (UTC)"I take it you two got into Rob's product?"
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Date: 2008-05-11 11:47 pm (UTC)Matt thinks L should definitely get stoned with them.
"I'm glad you came over. Thanks. And dude -" this to Mello "- you're the one who brought up spelling, not me."
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Date: 2008-05-12 12:00 am (UTC)Near's not entirely sure what to make of Matt's owl, but in a few minutes he's knocking on his door anyway, because the idea of it makes his eyebrows shoot up.
That, and if Mello really is stoned, it just might be amusing.
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Date: 2008-05-12 12:07 am (UTC)I open the door and grin. "Near." I giggle and pull him in the door. "My Near," I murmur, pulling him close.
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Date: 2008-05-12 12:10 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-12 12:13 am (UTC)"Mello is blatantly more stoned than I am. He just giggled."
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Date: 2008-05-12 12:16 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-12 12:19 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-05-12 12:24 am (UTC)"Whether you partake as well is up to you."
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Date: 2008-05-12 12:28 am (UTC)"Are you going to?" he asks him, offering the pipe. "It feels nice, but you don't need to. I'm just glad you came."
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