[Application] Mentok the Mindtaker (ooo-eee-ooo), Harvey Birdman Attorney at Law

[swap-minds4fun.livejournal.com]

As entrances go, his was a bit more flashy, with purple smoke and him floating in the middle of the room.

"Hey! My sabbatical's supposed to be in Tahiti, not Scotland!"

But no matter how many times he poofed, he just reappeared in the Sorting Room.




1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?

"Not Roquefort anymore, that's for sure. It's pretty fun to float around pieces of sliced cheese and fold them with my mind."

2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?

"Why kill them when I can just take their mind?"

3. What time is it where you are?

"It's supposed to be martini time, but I got rerouted."

4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.

"Hm, anyone I want in the Order? Tonks. She seems to have a good head on her shoulders. Hermione if sh"e's legal.

5. If you are pushing to be in:

A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.

"I would name it 'Takes Your Mind'. Cause I am MENTOK! THE MINDTAKER! OOOOO-EEEEEE-OOOOOO!" He added, waving his hands around for effect.

B. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.

"You know, I once presided over a wedding where one woman married six men. If their state recognizes gay marriage, Harry could just marry them both."

C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.

"Too many cases. And only two judges to preside over them."

D. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.

"Useless? Me? I am MENTOK! THE MINDTAKER! Can you do this?" And he swapped two minds. Those minds just happened to be Ofdensen and Wishbone.

"Cool!"

Not again!

6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.

"I can swap minds, take minds, rearrange minds! Oh, and...uh, I'm a judge so any judge-y stuff, too."



"I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. __Mentok__________
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. ___Mentok________.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. ____Mentok______.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. ___Mentok__________"

Comments

[wolfram-jyari.livejournal.com]

"What was that woman doing marrying six men at once?" Wolfram demanded. "Every person deserves one person to love them more than anyone else! It's not fair to expect the husbands to share!"

[swap-minds4fun.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, well, she's not the most faithful of women. Despite all those husbands? I dated her once." He looked strangely proud of doing so.

[wolfram-jyari.livejournal.com]

Wolfram did not approve. "Those men should have waited their turn patiently, like decent husbands!"

[fondofcabinets.livejournal.com]

If they let you into Hogwarts, I'll officially hang myself in the Great Hall with a rope I tied from my shirts.

I'm bloody serious.

[swap-minds4fun.livejournal.com]

"Well, it'd make for a decent spectacle. And no blood for the surviors to clean, either." Hey, if someone wanted to commit suicide just because he's here, whatever.

VOTE: SQUIB

[fondofcabinets.livejournal.com]

That was far too easy.
Have a good day, Squib.

[unluckiest-star.livejournal.com]

Starman flew over to the newcomer. This was gonna be one of those 'wacky' supervillains, wasn't it? Oh well. Could be worse, he guessed.

"What do you judge? You're not related to the clown who judges bread contests, are you?"

[swap-minds4fun.livejournal.com]

Back in the day, when everyone was hero-ing or villain-ing, he was a formidable enemy. Then everyone (except X, but really now we could just consider it stalking rather than villainy) decided to go into law. So yeah, less evil, more childish.

"No, nothing that fun. I'm a court judge."

[unluckiest-star.livejournal.com]

"Oh-kaaaaay."

Why was he the one living in a sanitarium again?

"Sooooo...Justice. Thoughts? Got some?"

[iam-beowulf.livejournal.com]

Beowulf charged in ... then stopped, looking confused.

"ARE YOU A MONSTER?"

[swap-minds4fun.livejournal.com]

"Nope, alien. Biiiiig difference."

[iam-beowulf.livejournal.com]

This was not a word Beowulf knew. "Alien?" he repeated.

[dinosaurman.livejournal.com]

"Swapping minds, huh?" Grant asked the newcomer. "And what exactly does that entail?"

[swap-minds4fun.livejournal.com]

"Watch this."

And he turned toward the newcomer, one Ian Malcolm.

[ian-ma1co1m.livejournal.com]

Ian entered the Sorting Room, his kitten Fractal riding on his shoulder, and read the application.

"One woman, six men? Really? How'd that work for them?"

[swap-minds4fun.livejournal.com]

"Mindswap!"

And suddenly Ian's body began acting like a cat. Ian's mind? In the actual cat.

"Now, to answer your question," he addressed the cat. "Probably well for all but Harvey, they all slept with her at some point. Harv was mildly uncomfortable with the whole thing."

[ian-ma1co1m.livejournal.com]

Shocked, "Ian" let out a high-pitched, top of his lungs wail and flailed his arms in search of balance. The "kitten" snarled at the applicant and looked around the room. Spotting a usual suspect, he sped over to Grant and howled angrily up at him. A long way up.

[bread-clown.livejournal.com]

Pierrot rode back into the sorting room on his unicycle.

"What's this about a judge? Im a judge to you know!"

He couldn't let himself be upstaged, after all.

[swap-minds4fun.livejournal.com]

"Oh, you must be that bread clown Tall and Shiny mentioned. You need a better makeup job."

[bread-clown.livejournal.com]

"B- better makeup job! I don't see you having millions of dollars because of a successful circus! You Uri Geller wannabe!"

[mello-n-choco.livejournal.com]

"Utterly mental," I snark. I lean against one of the pillars, lego in one hand, chocolate in the other. "'Mind taking'? Ranks right up there with killer note books and 'mononoke' things. Or insane clown posses." In other words, probably true, but utterly stupid.

[swap-minds4fun.livejournal.com]

"In what way? Oh, you don't believe me. Well. Ooooo-eeee-oooo...you go by the name Mello, you kicked a guy for calling you your real name, you love chocolate, you're famous for fucking an albino in this very room, and oh, yeah, that guy you kicked is coming in here in three, two..."

Sure enough, Soichiro came into the room, and stopped short.

"You have green skin."

"And you have a porn star mustache but you don't hear me complaining."

"What?!"

"Bwoooop!" And he poofed Soichiro away, presumably to his room.

[ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com]

"How good of a judge are you?" The Hat was quite interested in all things legal, since some of its activities may have occasionally (only occasionally!) toed the line of good and legal sensibilities.

[swap-minds4fun.livejournal.com]

"Pretty good, I guess, haven't had an appeal yet. And they tapped me to replace Mightor when he went missing during the Flintstone case, so I must have something going for me."

Slytherin!

[ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com]

Your bribe has been accepted!

Welcome to Slytherin!