[identity profile] bread-clown.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] hh_mirror
Pierrot was ready to bite into the young Azuma's latest masterpiece. The bread he made always evoked quite a reaction. It seemed like the better his bread was, the worse Pierrot's puns became, but that was quite alright as the very basics of bread judging rely on two things: ridiculous reactions and bad puns.

So he took his first bite, squeaking out his own name right beforehand as he often did.

"Pierrot..." He chewed on the bread for a few moments. "Ungh!!" Pierrot fell over and passed out for a moment, awaking to find himself in a strange great hall of some sort surrounded by people, some of which looked even odder than himself.

This bread reaction was even stranger then the time Azuma's bread sent him back in time and revived his parents.


1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?

"Ooooh how wonderful! A quiz! I so often judge them I'm barely ever in one!" Pierrot orated loudly as he spun pirouettes around the dictaquill. "As far as cheese goes, it really depends on what you are putting it in, no? Say I nice rottengrot loaf, or perhaps some regular dinner bread. You can't go putting the wrong cheese on bread, It would just be no good at all!"


2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?

Pierrot overacted his thinking process by placing a finger on his chin and looking upwards. "Well if I had to kill them, I could kill both at the same time!"

He suddenly split and became two of himself, both talking in unison. "When you judge such large competitions as I do, this is the only way to sample all the bread without wasting time or getting full!"

The two Pierrot's proceeded to answer all the remaining questions in unison.


3. What time is it where you are?

"It was time to judge Azuma's bread, but it seems that time is far off now. These bread reactions certainly are getting more and more ridiculous."


4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.

"I'm not Dumbledore, but I'm certainly not serious either!" The two Pierrots' giggles are obviously not ones that suggest much in the way of seriousness. Or sanity.


5. If you are pushing to be in:

A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.

"I could call it The King Of Monaco! After all I was the King of Monaco for a little while. Before I brought my father back from the dead through eating bread that sent me back in time!"


B. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.

"Harry should bring them both before me and have them cook! Obviously a partner needs to know how to do the housework while he is away, and food is a fundamental part of that. Whichever can make me a better meal shall become his mate!" His elaborate hand gestures made it obvious he thought this was a grand idea.


C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.

"Where is this desk? I can solve this problem! When you a world class clown like myself you learn to isolate an important piece of paperwork even if its scattered amongst ten thousand unimportant memos!" After all, managing the most famous circus in the world does have quite its share of paperwork.


D. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.

The two Pierrots split into 10 Pierrots each for a total of 20, then began dusting and cleaning the sorting room at lightning speed. After a moment all the Pierrots finished their work and stood before the sorting hat in ranks of 5. "See how clean I can keep this place?" they ask in unison.


6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.

All 20 Pierrots begin pulling an assortment of items from god knows where. Suddenly the sorting room is filled with a mix of cookery, gambling paraphernalia, picture books, jewelry, musical instruments, fishing poles, and clothing. They all ask together, "Anything you like?"

Also, for each person who wants to ask Pierrot questions, a different Pierrot will walk up to them and start talking.



I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. Pierrot Bolneze
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. Pierrot Bolneze
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. Pierrot Bolneze
One day, marmalade will rule the world. Pierrot Bolneze

Vote: Squib

Date: 2008-04-22 01:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] waste-lock.livejournal.com

"NO CLOWNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"



Even one would have been too many.

Image (http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v610/atalantapendragonne/?action=view&current=squibcarnage.jpg)

Date: 2008-04-22 01:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cardarchitect.livejournal.com
Either it's 20 people who were able to appear as one, or one who could appear as twenty. Or some odd thing in between. In this place, there were no shortage of possibilities.

"How do you do that?"

Date: 2008-04-22 02:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cardarchitect.livejournal.com
As far as Near was aware, being a clown involved no such thing. But then, as far as he'd known at one point, you couldn't kill someone just by writing down their name.

So, he was willing to keep an open mind.

"I take it 300 is an achievement?"

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Vote: Gryffindor

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Date: 2008-04-22 02:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bad-date-nate.livejournal.com
Nate had been in a sullen sulk in the Slytherin common room for several weeks. Although he did not believe for a second that his girlfriend, Blair Waldorf, had been turned into popcorn, he did believe that she had ditched him in the middle of Scotland, and he no idea why. Of course, normal, hot-blooded boyfriends would be going after her, possibly running through the airport with "If You Leave" blaring on the soundtrack of life, but Nate... sucked.

So his big, grand gesture after weeks of moping was actually to check out the sorting room. And after checking out Pierrot's outfit, he really wish he hadn't.

"Uh..."

Date: 2008-04-22 02:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bad-date-nate.livejournal.com
Nate took in Pierrot's dress, his makeup...

"I seem confused?"

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Gryffindor

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Date: 2008-04-22 02:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] unluckiest-star.livejournal.com
Oooh-kay then.

"Pop quiz for you, my smiley friend. Are you by any chance from a planet called Cargg?"

Date: 2008-04-22 02:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] unluckiest-star.livejournal.com
Thom leaned backwards in the embrace. "Ahmmmm. Yeah. Mask, not makeup. " He cleared his throat. "How, um, how many of you are there? Currently? Like, right now in this room?"

He was pretty sure he'd taken his pills today - all four colors - but there still remained a chance that the answer was zero.

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Vote: Hufflepuff

From: [identity profile] unluckiest-star.livejournal.com - Date: 2008-04-22 04:31 am (UTC) - Expand

Re: Vote: Hufflepuff

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Re: Vote: Hufflepuff

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Date: 2008-04-22 02:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] secondfastest.livejournal.com
Hey! A clown!

Toki is only able to keep himself from squealing in happiness on the grounds that squealing is not metal, nor can it ever be made so by anyone. Still, he's obviously fidgety and happy. "Does you do cocaines?" Because dude, if this guy does cocaine he'd be just like Dr. Rockso who is totally Toki's best friend ever and a clown besides. Clowns are metal.

Date: 2008-04-22 02:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] secondfastest.livejournal.com
"Drugs is metal!" Yeah. That's really all the explanation that Toki needs.

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Vote: Hufflepuff

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Date: 2008-04-22 04:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mello-n-choco.livejournal.com
I snuck out of the room while Near was gone. I think if he knew I had broken his charm, he'd be a little irked. On my way to the great hall for some hot milk, which he'd gripe at me for as well, but I really wanted hot chocolate, I hear a commotion in the sorting room. I shouldn't but I'm sick of being sick and stuck in the room, so I peek in to see if Near's about. I slide in, trying to be quite. God, this is ridiculous. I stand by a pillar and a large sneeze makes my ears pop. Damn it.

Date: 2008-04-22 05:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mello-n-choco.livejournal.com
I back up slightly. "Two days. Why? What are you?"

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Vote Hufflepuff

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Re: Vote Hufflepuff

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Date: 2008-04-24 03:17 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mid-west-egg.livejournal.com
Nick really did not know what to say or think.

All he could do was repeat Pierrot. "You brought your father back from the dead through eating bread that sent you back in time ... ?"

Date: 2008-04-25 01:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mid-west-egg.livejournal.com
Nick wasn't one of those men who'd come back jumpy from the battlefields of France. He'd never been easy to rattle, and his wartime experiences had only made him more stoic. Pierrot didn't frighten him.

Pierrot did confuse the devil out of him.

"Ah. It's some kind of religious metaphor?"

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Date: 2008-04-26 02:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com
The Sorting Hat liked Pierrot's style. Of course it did. What could be gaudier than a profusion of clowns?

"You are so talented!" it gushed. "Did it take a bread reaction to make you what you are today, or were you just born this way?"

Born in full clown make-up?

Date: 2008-04-26 02:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com
"How could your parents fail to notice such a talented young man?!" The Hat was appalled. Then it thought it realized something. "They must have been withholding affection as a deliberate ploy to make you strive for greatness! Either way, you are definitely a world-class clown! I've never met such a clown before!"

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From: [identity profile] ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com - Date: 2008-04-26 05:38 am (UTC) - Expand

Hufflepuff!

Date: 2008-04-26 05:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com
Your bribe has been accepted!

Welcome to Hufflepuff!

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