Transfiguration Class

[tartan-pussy.livejournal.com]

Minerva knew that students rarely made it to class on time these days (if at all) and so she left the following instructions on the board:


Today we will be turning straw into cheese straws. Please take a handful of straw from the table back to your work space.

A wand is required for this class. If you do not own one, see me. I have loaner wands you may use for this class.

Once you have all your supplies in order, you may begin with the lesson. Take a single straw and set it on your desk away from anything else. Point your wand at it and say the incantation "Caseum verto" while envisioning the straw turning into cheese. Do NO say "CaseUS verto" lest you turn part of yourself into cheese.

Once you have succesfully tranfigured three straws, call for me to come inspect your work. Do not eat your materials until I have inspected them!

If you require additional assistant, raise your hand and I will come help you.

Comments

[buggy-genius.livejournal.com]

"Hey, it was for science. Now I know that yes, it is indeed possible to have parts of you turn into cheese. Kind of a weird feeling, and the smell's making me hungry."

[racheltherunner.livejournal.com]

"Do you mind if I ask," I smiled, raising one eyebrow, "why you would want to turn a body part into cheese? Other than the obvious benefits, of course. I mean, you'd be a hit at parties. And you would never have to sit in traffic and be so hungry you dig through the glove box hoping to find a stale stick of gum."

[buggy-genius.livejournal.com]

"To see if I could do it?" No, seriously--no matter how much scientific jargon got thrown around after this, that was his sole driving reason. "I'm hoping it's reversable. Asiago's good cheese, but it's going to start to mold after a while. And there's something really, really creepy about eating something that's coming out of your face."

[racheltherunner.livejournal.com]

Hey, that worked for me. Half the things I did were for that exact reason. "Valid," I nodded, smiling. Then, the corners of my mouth edging up into something a bit more mischievous, I leaned forward, plucking a piece of the cheese off of the side of his head and popping it into your mouth. "Not bad," I said, vaguely impressed. "Seriously, you should market it as a novelty party gag." Winking, I licked my finger and sat back. "Trust me, this is no where near the creepiest thing I've seen. Cheese out of your face? That's just funny."

[buggy-genius.livejournal.com]

"Quit it," he said, waving her away. "I'm going to look like even more of an idiot if this ever goes back to normal."

[racheltherunner.livejournal.com]

Leaning in, I lowered my voice. "You don't look like an idiot." Then I smiled so that the corners of my eyes crinkled. "Even though you do have a snack bar growing out of the side of your head."

[buggy-genius.livejournal.com]

"I tend to think that looking like Cheesebeard the Slacker Pirate is, in fact, looking like an idiot." Still, he didn't sound overly upset about it. Hey, if having a cheese beard got him attention from cute girls, he wasn't going to complain too much about it. He wondered briefly if he could figure out a way to turn it into chocolate.

[racheltherunner.livejournal.com]

"I'm telling you," I laughed, leaning back again, "you're missing a wonderful opportunity in the land of party entertainment with that. You even have a costume idea - we could get you an eye patch and a little parrot that gave out crackers."

Looking around, I then made as if to stand, "And speaking of slackers - I probably should go attempt the assignment myself. I doubt I'll have your stunning success," grinning, I winked at him, "but a girl's gotta try."

[buggy-genius.livejournal.com]

"Well, if I ever decide I want to change my career from picking bugs off of dead people to something infinitely less interesting that will sap my dignity, I'll keep that in mind. Though I'm in favor of the parrot."

He waved. "Good luck with that. And when she says don't say it that way? Don't say it that way. Who knew?"

[racheltherunner.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, magic tends to be tricky like that. But I'll try to keep it in mind." Returning the wave, grinning, I turned and headed up to the desk to pick out a wand and grab some straws. I swear to God, if I turned any part of myself into cheese, I was suing someone.