(no subject)
Feb. 8th, 2006 12:45 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png)
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Cheese huh? I've heard good cheese comes from Happy Cows and Happy Cows come from California. I came up with that one you know. Oh, you should have heard the screams of bloody murder in Wisconsin...
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Easy. Carrottop of course. He's lame and no one pays attention to him anymore. Not one of my better ideas, I'll admit. Barney causes chaos and feelings of deeply seeded unease in adults and he makes little children pee their pants with glee when they see him in person, thus causing their adult parents even more embarrassment and unease. It's a never-ending cycle with that dinosaur. I live off that kind of shit.
3. What time is it where you are?
Time is subjective.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
All of them. At once. And then I'd play them off each other till the whole thing was one gigantic cluster fuck. Man I love cluster fucks...
5. If you are pushing to be in:
I ain't pushing nothin' 'cause s'alluseful good.
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
Gotterdammerung – oh come on! It's obvious! Now, now I wouldn't be the bartender. I'd be the guy sitting up in the balcony area with his big mug-o-mead and laughing at the ensuing chaos that erupts from a bunch of wanna-be goths trying to serve drinks in utter darkness. Also, I would ensure the use of glass in the serving of said drinks. The resulting bloodshed would probably make my blood-brother very happy.
B. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Both, but allow me to explain. Following the logic in #4 it would behoove me to induce Harry into marrying one first, and then playing on the jealousy of the other so the whole thing turns into a love-triangle worthy of daytime television. I would also be sure to include various others in the plot, such as Ron and Hermione. For shits and giggles, let's throw in the twins' little sister, a of long lost sibling or two, and a couple of pregnancies. Mix ingredients together thoroughly, let simmer for one or two days, and enjoy. Hey, it worked for the Greeks...
C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Oops. My bad.
D. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.
Look. I can turn into just about anything under the sun and offer riches, boobs, and gold to the highest bidder. That ain't useless kiddos. Actually, now that I think about it, this might not be such a bad house. You know what they say about the quiet, hard working ones, right...?I would totally not attempt to rally the troops and take over the rest of the school in a violent, messy, chaotic blood bath just to practice for Ragnarok. Nope.
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
Boobs. Who doesn't like boobs? Failing that, I can do just about anything. You want gold, glory and fame? I got it.I gave you people Harry God Damned Potter. What fandom is better – or more chaotic – than that? Do I even get a thank you? Sheesh.
Cheese huh? I've heard good cheese comes from Happy Cows and Happy Cows come from California. I came up with that one you know. Oh, you should have heard the screams of bloody murder in Wisconsin...
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Easy. Carrottop of course. He's lame and no one pays attention to him anymore. Not one of my better ideas, I'll admit. Barney causes chaos and feelings of deeply seeded unease in adults and he makes little children pee their pants with glee when they see him in person, thus causing their adult parents even more embarrassment and unease. It's a never-ending cycle with that dinosaur. I live off that kind of shit.
3. What time is it where you are?
Time is subjective.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
All of them. At once. And then I'd play them off each other till the whole thing was one gigantic cluster fuck. Man I love cluster fucks...
5. If you are pushing to be in:
I ain't pushing nothin' 'cause s'all
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
B. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Both, but allow me to explain. Following the logic in #4 it would behoove me to induce Harry into marrying one first, and then playing on the jealousy of the other so the whole thing turns into a love-triangle worthy of daytime television. I would also be sure to include various others in the plot, such as Ron and Hermione. For shits and giggles, let's throw in the twins' little sister, a of long lost sibling or two, and a couple of pregnancies. Mix ingredients together thoroughly, let simmer for one or two days, and enjoy. Hey, it worked for the Greeks...
C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Oops. My bad.
D. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.
Look. I can turn into just about anything under the sun and offer riches, boobs, and gold to the highest bidder. That ain't useless kiddos. Actually, now that I think about it, this might not be such a bad house. You know what they say about the quiet, hard working ones, right...?
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
Boobs. Who doesn't like boobs? Failing that, I can do just about anything. You want gold, glory and fame? I got it.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 05:51 am (UTC)Oh, I like you. Lots. And the way you think.
Even though I don't believe in gods.Hm. I think I'll pass on the gold, glory and fame. Your autograph might be fun, though.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 05:58 am (UTC)Mwa!
(no subject)
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Date: 2006-02-08 05:54 am (UTC)Slytherin, though.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 06:00 am (UTC)Thank you though.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 05:55 am (UTC)((OOC: LOKI?! OMFG, I'M IN LOVE. BEST. NORSE. GOD. EVER.))
no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 06:02 am (UTC)((OOCly *bows*))
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From:SLYTHERIN.
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From:SLYTHERIN
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Date: 2006-02-08 05:56 am (UTC)Gryffindor.
Devi, Adam, sorry guys.no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 06:04 am (UTC)Thank you. *bows*
no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 05:58 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 06:05 am (UTC)leprechaun'sgold?(no subject)
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From:::Screened for the Assassin and the Chaotic God only::
From:::Screened for the Assassin and the Chaotic God only::
From:::Screened for the Assassin and the Chaotic God only::
From:::Screened for the Assassin and the Chaotic God only::
From:::Screened for the Assassin and the Chaotic God only::
From:::Screened for the Assassin and the Chaotic God only::
From:::Screened for the Assassin and the Chaotic God only::
From:::Screened for the Assassin and the Chaotic God only::
From:no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 06:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 04:44 pm (UTC)Thank you.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 06:15 am (UTC)Slytherin for you, sir.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 04:47 pm (UTC)Thank you. *bows*
no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 07:30 am (UTC)Slytherin.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 04:48 pm (UTC)and it's a virtual all-you-can-eat-chaos-buffet. How can I turn that down?Gryffindor
Date: 2006-02-08 07:56 am (UTC)Because Slytherin already has Ryuuji. We hardly need any more chaos.
And I pass on the bribe, yet again.
Re: Gryffindor
Date: 2006-02-08 08:00 am (UTC)Re: Gryffindor
From:::screened for the Makers of Mischief only::
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From:Re: ::screened for the Makers of Mischief only::
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From:no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 03:52 pm (UTC)No bribe is neccesary.
Thank youno subject
Date: 2006-02-08 04:54 pm (UTC)Still, I offer my assistance in any chaotic duties or general needs should such pop up in the future.
(no subject)
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Date: 2006-02-08 07:08 pm (UTC)Slytherin.
*backs away*
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Date: 2006-02-08 07:59 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2006-02-08 08:07 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 11:30 pm (UTC)memorableenjoyable indeed.no subject
Date: 2006-02-08 11:33 pm (UTC)Bitchiwitch, you gravlax-munching upstart.
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Date: 2006-02-08 11:37 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 12:21 am (UTC)I think you're a Gryffindor. Slytherins don't give that much warning. Unless it's a threat.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 03:35 am (UTC)(no subject)
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From:Vote: Gryffindor
From:no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 12:52 am (UTC)Squib, just to get you out of here before you can cause any more trouble than my schoolfellows do without, ah, divine intervention.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 03:36 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 03:43 am (UTC)I have boobs, thanks.
If you want to help
take overimprove the school, you should at least work with us in Ravenclaw, because that's exactly what we're trying to do.But it's time to start recruiting minions. If you end up in Hufflepuff, would you be willing to do that for us? I'd take that as a bribe instead of the other things you're offering.no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 03:54 am (UTC)Your proposition strikes me as interesting. Once the sorting is all over and done with, should the mighty Hat decree that Hufflepuff be my new home, we shall meet and talk it over in more detail.One can never improve one's school enough really.Vote: Hufflepuff
From:Re: Vote: Hufflepuff
From:no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 08:32 am (UTC)Hello there. *smiles* Didn't we meet before, in Sarajevo in the summer of 1914? I think you borrowed my parasol, if I'm not mistaken, and went around using it to poke the backs of the spectators at some sort of parade that was going on. *smile tightens a little--she does know what else happened at that parade.* I don't believe you ever gave it back, as a matter of fact.
I know I've met your wife.
Hey, it worked for the Greeks...
*amused again* I suppose that depends on how you mean "worked."
((Much love for this--your Loki is awesome! My favorite Norse god (well, isn't he everyone's?) The answer for Ravenclaw is probably my favorite so far, and that last strike-out still has me giggling.))
no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 02:07 pm (UTC)Why hello there yourself. I didn't know you were around m'dear. I think I still have that parasol around here somewhere. I'm afraid I lost you in the crowd ones things got... interesting. Would you like it back?
Everyone's met my wife darling, though I think she's a bit tied up at the moment. Not literally, mind, but she is busy.
Honey, you Greeks are chaotic artists in your own rights. I mean, look at Zeus: Man's a genius.
((Aw, thank you! *blushes*))
Slytherin
From:no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 02:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 02:09 pm (UTC)Everyone else now... that's another story.no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 02:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 06:09 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 07:50 pm (UTC)(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2006-02-09 09:42 pm (UTC)I did wonder what caused us all to come into being all those centuries ago. Should have guessed it was you. No one else could create a fandom so incredibly wanktastic!no subject
Date: 2006-02-10 01:09 am (UTC)You were one of my best creations, if I don't mind saying so. Always target the children I say, because adults trying to regain their lost childhood will always throw themselves onto it and go mad in the process. It's almost too easy.(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2006-02-10 01:44 am (UTC)And I think you're AWESOME, but you really belong in Slytherin.
Slytherin
Date: 2006-02-10 06:34 am (UTC)Slytherin, I'd say.
no subject
Date: 2006-02-10 06:35 am (UTC)Because gods know I'm not crazy enough to put you anywhere near where I'm at.