Journey into Recovery ((Sock, RP, Kusuriyuri, Yukimura, Kuronue))

[edomedpeddler.livejournal.com]

What god-modding there is has been approved. Topic and action likely to wander to NSFW areas and possibly triggery.

It had taken him longer to recover than he expected, but Kusuriyuri had finally convinced Kurama that he was well enough to return to his office for the day. He had almost had to threaten his lover with wards to make Kurama go to the greenhouses. He was just finishing preparing to leave when there was a soft knock at the door. Frowning at the wards that thought about identifying the presence as Kuronue but wouldn't commit, Kusuriyuri opened the door, not surprised the knocker was Yukimura, though he was surprised to see the samurai.

"I am sorry to bother you so early," Yukimura said, bowing. "As well as at your home, but I have something I wish to speak with you about in private."

Kusuriyuri tilted his head and looked at Yukimura. A contented exhaustion overlayed a deeper sense of concern. He returned the bow and stepped back. "Please, come in. Good morning." He wondered how long Yukimura had been waiting to be sure Kurama had left for the day.

Yukimura smiled as he walked past the peddler, stepping out of his shoes easily before entering the main portion of the house. "Good morning and thank you for your indulgence."

Kusuriyuri led Yukimura to the living room and gestured for him to take a seat. He watched while the samurai knelt between the couch and the table. Kusuriyuri knelt opposite him and waited.

Boukensha crawled into Kusuriyuri's lap and Belophoebe sniffed at Yukimura before hopping up on the couch behind his head, turning to deliberately ignore him except for her tail that draped over his shoulder.

Yukimura reached up and brushed her tail, causing ti to twitch and then settle again on his shoulder. "First, I want to thank you for everything you have done for us, Kuronue and myself. Words only are not enough."

"You have done much for us, as well," Kusuriyuri murmured. He knew that Yukimura's relationship with Kurama and Kuronue helped the fox in many ways.

A smile crossed Yukimura's lips. "I also know that we are far more in your debt." He reached up and caressed Bel's tail, amusement in his features as her tail flicked around his neck, lingering, before settling on his shoulder again. His expression sobered as his hand settled in his lap. "And I am here to place myself more in your debt."

While it was expected, Kusuriyuri's eyebrow went up. "This one does not consider you in his debt," he said formally. "As to your request, this one is a medicine peddler."

"True, but as to whether what I ask is within your trade..." Yukimura protested, his hand coming up to caress Bel's tail again.

"Ease your mind, then, and make your request," Kusuriyuri suggested after watching Yukimura pet the cat's tail a long moment.

Sighing, Yukimura said, "It is a difficult thing, but Kuronue did agree to this." He looked at Kusuriyuri. "Kuronue is still having nightmares. He doesn't always recognize me when I try to soothe or wake him. While he has only snarled at me in his sleep, this is a newer development and I would not care to see it become worse."

Kusuriyuri bowed to Yukimura. "This is a difficult thing," he murmured.

Nodding, Yukimura continued, "And, neither of us is used to asking for help. But, I do not wish to have you obliged, either. I remember that thing Apos threw at you."

"Once this one's body accepted it, it has ceased to be a problem." Nor would it be one in the future with Apos trapped in the sinning tree.

"That is good to hear. I would not want you to come to permanent harm." There was genuine relief in the samurai's voice.

"What is it that you would ask of this one?" Kusuriyuri asked. "What you have said does sound as though it would be within the scope of a medicine peddler."

"It is more complex than that," Yukimura said carefully. "To allow himself to be open enough, he needs more than I am able to give him."

Kusuriyuri frowned slightly. "More?"

"Yes," Yukimura nodded. "Violence and sex are very closely tied in his mind. I tend to be more gentle unless he provokes me, and even then, I am not as harsh as he desires sometimes. But, when he receives such treatment, his mind is more open."

"Is that so?" Kusuriyuri murmured. "That may be why Akabane affected him so deeply."

A wry expression crossed Yukimura's face, his eyes hardening. "Perhaps, but we both would like him to reach a level of peace rather than just burying his heart again. I would rather he healed."

The image of Ro impinged on Kusuriyuri's mind. He'd kept his distance but he had seen how very weak and injured that part of Kuronue's mind had been. "Healing cannot be forced," he said carefully.

"I know. I also am aware that things between us may change. I also know that things may become worse before they improve." Yukimura held up his hand. "I trust and respect your judgement, both in regard to whether you'll accept and what you tell Kurama. If you will not, there will be nothing more spoken of this."

Kusuriyuri was silent a long moment, stroking Boukensha as he thought. "I would speak with Kuronue alone first," he said slowly. While he understood why Yukimura approached him—things between him and Kuronue were still somewhat awkward despite the recent changes in their relationship—he needed to know this was truly what Kuronue wanted, that he was prepared.

"Of course," Yukimura said. His eyes went unfocused for a moment and he rose. "He will be here soon," he said, bowing. "Thank you."

Kusuriyuri rose before returning the bow. "It is what is done," he said as Yukimura walked to the hall.

"By some," Yukimura said, turning as he stepped into his shoes. "Those who are indeed worthy of regard," he added with a bow, stepping out of the door.

Comments

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

"There's no need to feel stupid or embarrassed," Yukimura said, his tone apologetic for laughing at Kuronue. "If you never had the chance to learn to be loved, it is sometimes hard to recognize and takes a while to learn." He smiled gently. "I think, now that you know, you'll learn very quickly. And, yes, I am happy with you. I'm not happy that you're suffering right now, but I know that, in the end, you'll be better off for it, that we will be better off for it."

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

He nodded. "Good."

Shifting, Kuronue rolled himself over and brought his face close to Yukimura's. "Can we make love?" he asked, almost hesitant. "And then sleep, for a while? I want to think, and be around you..."

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

"We are making love," Yukimura said gently, wrapping his arms around Kuronue's body. "But, if you want to, we can continue." He brushed a light kiss to Kuronue's lips. "Do you want to talk about what you're thinking about? Or do you need to think before you can?"

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue settled himself in Yukimura's lap so he could wrap his arms around him as well, he returned the kiss, gentle and light. "I think if I tried to vocalise any of it, it'd say the wrong things. I just need a while to sort my head out before I go back to Kusuriyuri."

He rand hands through Yukimura's hair, then smoothed it back down. Smiled. "Can you make love to me though," he clarified, marvelling at how annoying vague this 'making love' thing was. It was also kind of girly.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

"That's fine," he murmured in response to Kuronue not wanting to talk. "When you can or want to talk, I'm here." He brushed another kiss to Kuronue's mouth, still light and gentle.

"It's not girly," he murmured, amusement in his voice, just catching Kuronue's thought. He wasn't prying or trying to see his lover's mind right now, but that thought came through. "And, I will show you, my love. I would love to make love to you and with you." This time, his kiss was a little longer, lingering, still gentle.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

"I know. You're always here. It's why I love you," he said, before letting himself get distracted by those kisses.

Strangely, he didn't seem to want to rush. Not like before. He was content to kiss and play with Yukimura's hair idly as he did.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

It was different, nice, being able to take his time. Yukimura kept half expecting Kuronue to push, but being able to just enjoy a chaste kiss, to play with his lover's hair, to just be with him for a while was very nice. "I love that you're willing to keep trying, that you don't give up," he said gently, pressing his cheek to Kuronue's for a moment. "That you push yourself beyond what you've been through." It wasn't the best wording, he knew, but he felt it needed to be said. "I also love that you let me see when you're vulnerable."

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue almost purred. It felt nice to hear such things.

He turned his head to press kisses to Yukimura's cheek and jaw. "You deserve it."

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

"And, you need to hear it, my love," Yukimura's voice was gentle. "To help you find things in yourself to love." He returned the kisses to Kuronue's jaw. "When you love yourself, when you learn that, I look forward to seeing the confidence it will inspire," he whispered. "True confidence, not just being cocky," he added, teasing a little.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

He laughed a little, tilting his head to silently ask for more. "Guess my ego was just all bullshit..."

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

"I think you'll find something better," Yukimura said, not agreeing or disagreeing as his lips took their time granting Kuronue's request. He hummed, wrapping his arms tighter around Kuronue, hugging him close, humming as he did. His lips returned to Kuronue's ear, pressing light kisses there.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Smiling softly, Kuronue enjoyed the hug, the feel of Yukimura's lips on his skin. The kisses to his ear made him shiver a little and he closed his eyes, let his hands slide down Yukimura's back, clutching at the his clothes.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura's lips followed Kuronue's ear to the tip and then down, across his cheek and to his lips again, taking his time to enjoy the journey and Kuronue's reactions. His kiss, when he reached Kuronue's lips, was a little more than chaste, but still just a meeting of lips.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

The light kisses to his hear sent little shivers along his spine, and when Yukimura's lips met his again, he was glad for the slight increase in depth. He still wanted to taste Yukimura though, and sucking lightly on Yukimura's lower lip was alright, but he still wanted more. That he didn't have the urge the need, to just take it was something different. He wasn't frantic for it.

He wasn't hiding from his thoughts, he realised. That was it. It wasn't a state of zen, but it was something like it, for him. He'd never really been calm before. He'd always been on edge. Expecting something. Needing to get it over and done with so that he could be sure it still went okay, felt alright, wasn't a lie.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura brought his hand up and caressed his jaw. "Good," he whispered between kisses. He moved his kisses, up to brush against Kuronue's eye lids and over to his other ear before bringing them back to his lips, his tongue coming out to brush against his lover's lips, just tasting for now.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue found he liked how slow this was. there was something in it, in letting Yukimura kiss him like he was. All over. He made a soft, pleased sound and parted his own lips to lick at Yukimura's tongue with his own. Arousal stirred in his balls, in his cock. Nothing but a vague interest.

He'd honestly never felt at ease enough to reach that kind of half interested state. He brought a hand up to pet at Yukimura's hair again, nails running along his scalp lightly, fingers stroking the soft skin behind and bellow Yukimura's ear lightly.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura was very much enjoying this chance to get to explore Kuronue's body slowly, physically with his lips. He hadn't quite realized how much he wanted it until he was able to do it. He sucked lightly on Kuronue's tongue, lingering in the kiss longer before his lips traced Kuronue's jaw. He wasn't deliberately causing energy to flow between them, wasn't opening their bond, but somehow he felt more open to his lover than when he did. "Love you," he whispered when his lips reached the point where Kuronue's jaw joined his neck.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Humming, Kuronue's hand fisted in Yukimura's clothes at his lower back, clutched onto his shoulder. "I love you too," he replied, voice half catching as it fluctuated between whisper and a louder tone.

"The bond will get stronger," he added, remembering just how much he had to untangle in his mind. He marvelled and wondered at how it would be after, to be so open. Like every cell was Yukimura's. His fingers brushed over Yukimura's mark lightly. That state we reach sometimes? It will be like that, I think. All the time.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

When we reach it, you seem so much calmer, more secure. I'd like that, for both of us, Yukimura sighed. He shifted so he was kissing the underside of Kuronue's jaw then down his neck. "I would like that," he whispered aloud, his lips brushing Kuronue's skin as he spoke.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

He made a small sound of agreement in the back of his throat, tipped his head back and shivered lightly at the brush of Yukimura's lips on sensitive skin. Baring his throat to Yukimura was natural. "I would too," he sighed, finding his skin hot.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura hummed softly, his lips starting on the side of Kuronue's neck without the mark and working toward it, tracing his collarbones, the hollow between them, then the edges of the mark, keeping his touch light. He wanted Kuronue to enjoy this, not to push his lover into full on arousal, not yet.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue shivered again, clutched at Yukimura, fingers tracing the neck of his kimono. It seemed a tease to have Yukimura ease around something they both knew would feel great. It didn't make him enjoy the touch of Yukimura's lips any less, though. He licked his lips.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Gently, Yukimura eased Kuronue back onto the futon, letting his body come to rest on his lover's. He hovered over Kuronue, though, his fingers brushing his lover's hair, enjoying the relaxed and pleased expression on Kuronue's face.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue relaxed, stared up at Yukimura and smiled. He brought both his hand up to cup Yukimura's face and lifted his head up to give him a light kiss as he brought his knees up on either side of Yukimura, squeezing his lover's waist lightly.

[elegantsamurai.livejournal.com]

Yukimura brushed the backs of his fingers against Kuronue's cheek, keeping his eyes open a moment longer before returning the kiss, deepening it a little more than their prior kisses. His hand moved down to Kuronue's waist, caressing his skin under his vest, taking his time to memorize every inch of it.