Application : Ambassador Londo Mollari

[centauri-londo.livejournal.com]

((Londo has spoken to Delenn's mun and gotten the OK))

He stepped through the doorway and tugged at his coat, straightening the heavily embroidered sleeves. Ambassador Londo Mollari of the Great Centauri Republic surveyed his new surroundings. The walls and floor were wrought stone, but it did not have the same light and airy feel one would find in Centauri architecture. Was he back on Narn?

“Great Maker, I hope not,” he muttered to himself. “I could use a drink. Vir!” he bellowed.

Londo took a step forward and was startled to see a quill appear in front of him, just hovering over a piece of parchment.

 (("I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. Londo))
 ((I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. Londo))
  ((I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. Londo))
  ((One day, marmalade will rule the world. Londo"))
  

1.      What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite? 

Cheese, eh? Any kind that goes well with a good Centauri whiskey! But it should be fine and well aged, like good Spoo.

2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?

Would you like for me to arrange for a quiet assassination? Something with poison to dispatch them? I’m sure it could be easily done, if you could manage to dispatch Lord Refa for me in return.

      3. What time is it where you are?

It is time for the Great Centauri Republic to retake it’s rightful place among the stars! And I see it is also time for another drink. Vir! Where is he?

4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.

Are there any dancing girls in this order? Or is this an Order of some political importance? I have married for political gain, I am sure I could ‘harass’ someone if there was something to be gained from it.

5. If you are pushing to be in:

      A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.

There is an interesting bar in DownBelow I have heard of called the “Laughing Narn”. Although I have never seen a Narn laugh. Damnably sullen people.

I would prefer to work in a bar where there are many beautiful dancing girls, and being in the dark means that I could not appreciate their.. ample charms.

2. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.

Marriage? This Harry should take my advice. Never get married unless you stand to gain from it. Marrying for love only ends in heartbreak. Trust me, I have three wives from arranged marriages, Pestilince, Famine and Death, and the time when we are happiest is when we are furthest apart. 

3. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it. 

That simply means you need a more capable attache to handle your paperwork for you. Speaking of assistant, where is he? I need a new drink. Vir!

4. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.

Useless? I am Londo Mollari, Ambassador to Earth from the great Centauri Republic! I served in the Centauri military and was on the lead ship that conquered the Beta system in nine days! I have been called many things in my day, but useless has never been one of them!

5. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do. 

A bribe, eh? Now that is more like it! *rubs his hands together* I suppose it would all depend on what it is you were after. As Ambassador to Earth, I do have access to a great deal of.. useful information as well as some very powerful friends if you are after a political favor. It is always useful to have people in power who owe you something, yes?

Of course.. you could always take G’Kar. Him, I’d throw in for free.

 

Comments

[vislor-turlough.livejournal.com]

"Sounds more like 'they' would have something to gain if you harassed them."

[centauri-londo.livejournal.com]

I am sure we would both have something to gain from such an arrangement. Centauri males are known for their virility and stamina!

[vislor-turlough.livejournal.com]

"Yes, and your lover would probably expect money or trinkets in exchange, particularly if you want this kept quiet."

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

"Ah, but if your vision was impaired, think of how heightened your sense of touch would be."

Truth be told, Kaga was feeling a little apprehensive talking about being blinded, but he suppressed that thought as much as he could.

[centauri-londo.livejournal.com]

Londo grins, clearly appreciating the man's sense of fashion.
"Perhaps, but I prefer to have all my senses working at once, better for work and much better for play."

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

Kaga shrugged. "Suit yourself. To be fair, you probably have a point. Something could go wrong, after all, if you don't have control of all your senses."

[blue-ataru.livejournal.com]

((SQUEE.))

Despite being a former dancing girl with fairly ample charms (at least, when cover demanded it), Aayla was in no mood to be harassed and carried herself accordingly. She arched an eyebrow, glanced up at his hair, and was once again thankful for practical, low-maintenance Twi'lek headtails. "Who's G'kar?" Vir, she assumed, was some sort of servant or aide.

[centauri-londo.livejournal.com]

Londo could not resist a grin as the beautiful creature with blue skin approached. He could even ignore the strange glance to his hair, which should have impressed her as a sign of his rising status.
“G’kar? Bah.. do not concern yourself with him, my dear. To borrow a human phrase, he is ‘a thorn in my foot’.” The Centauri enjoyed using human aphorisms as part of his fascination with the race in general, but frequently misquoted them.
“He is a renegade and will soon come to face proper justice for his crimes against the Republic.”

[i-am-harkonnen.livejournal.com]

As he frequently did, the Baron Vladimir Harkonnen decided to stop by the Sorting Room to see who might be found today. He looked over the oddly-coiffured man, wondering who the hell did his hair. It was more ridiculous than a Bene Gesserit's headdress , which was saying something, as in the miniseries world that his mun's lifted his appearance from they had some seriously huge and insane headwear . But, the rest of his outfit looked respectable enough, and reading over the application, he also sounded respectable enough, despite his apparent obsession with females. An unfortunate weakness that, in what otherwise appeared to be a sensible politician- but that a weakness held by many of them. He couldn't fault him too much, and, was always pleased to find someone else with a background in politics at Hogwarts. This one also sounded like he was familiar with intergalactic civilization as well, which was nice- as Londo was dressed, there was of course no way for Vladimir to realize that he wasn't actually human given that the most apparent physical difference between a Centauri and a human involves their naughty bits .

He shifted his suspensor harness slightly beneath his opulent robe of red velvet, and drifted over to Londo, his immensity hovering a few inches off the ground. "Welcome to Hogwarts. You'll find it's quite a change from the political world- although it does have its own unique version of it. I take it you're not a native here either- if it helps at all, you're at Castle Hogwarts, a school in Scotland, and it is the year 2009 by their calendar's reckoning." Having interpreted handshakes as the traditional greeting of respect for this culture, he offered Londo his hand. "I'm Siridar-Baron Vladimir Harkonnen- but here, they don't even have space travel, let alone an intergalactic empire. So to fill my time, I serve as the Professor of what is called 'Muggle Studies'."

[centauri-londo.livejournal.com]

He accepted the hand, returning the shake firmly, as he had learned to in his earliest dealings with the humans. The large human appeared to be floating, which was very peculiar, but his manner was official and quite cultured. A fellow man of culture and power at last!

"2009? Great Maker.. to summon me this far, but into the past? Most strange," he muttered to himself. "I am Ambassador Londo Mollari, head of House Mollari." The mention of an intergalactic empire piqued his interest. Whose empire?
"Muggle Studies? What is a Muggle? Some form of alien?"

[entilzha-delenn.livejournal.com]

"I do not think Vir is coming anytime soon," Delenn said wryly as she approached. "Hello, Londo."

[centauri-londo.livejournal.com]

Londo’s grin widened, he laughed at the approach of the Mimbari. “Ah! My good friend Delenn! It’s wonderful to see you again! I do apologize for having Vir recalled so suddenly from Mimbar, but given the activity in the Centauruum, he was needed.”
((this would tell Delenn that this is Londo from 2260, before the great war and the attack on Babylon 5 by the Shadows))
Before she could comment he waved his hand, “No matter. How did we end up so far in the past?”

[g-wormtongue.livejournal.com]

While attempting to learn the castle layout. (Shifting staircases!?) Gríma stumbled into the sorting room by mistake. He stopped to read the application- apparently this one had a strangely up-front approach to bribery. Maybe he could give good information.

"You are an ambassador to earth?" He asked and then; "If your assistant does not appear, perhaps a house-elf could bring you a drink." It was better to talk to men while they were drinking, unless they were inclined to violence.

[centauri-londo.livejournal.com]

Londo turned towards the human, taking in his appearance.
This one could be quite useful, his eyes were sharp, his manner careful..
"Yes, my friend. I am Londo Mollari, Ambassador to Earth on behalf of the Great Centauri Republic. A house-elf? They are some sort of servants?"

[fiercefluffy.livejournal.com]

Octavian sized up the newcomer.

His hair appeared to have required some attention and maintenance. Its shape put the young Roman vaguely in mind of the crest on a centurion's helmet, if only it were turned sideways. It must be signal of some rank or station, though of what sort Octavian knew better than to guess. The talk of ambassadorship, politics, assassination -- well, Octavian thought it ill form to speak openly of one's capacity for plotting, but the man seemed cast from the coarse Antonian or Pompeian mold, and a man like that should not be underestimated no matter how artless he seemed. It was precisely the artlessness of such men that made them dangerous.

A handshake was to Octavian a symbolic gesture of other resonance (http://mi.byu.edu/publications/review/?vol=18&num=1&id=616) than the modern usage he customarily saw. When he stepped forward, he did not offer Londo Mollari his hand, only a courteous nod.

"I am Gaius Julius Caesar Octavianus, called Octavian. I too am son of a great Republic. Are you here on official business, Ambassador? There are other celestial notables among us as well." He might introduce Mollari to Tenel Ka, for instance.

[centauri-londo.livejournal.com]

While Londo did not recognize the name or the title, he certainly recognized the young man’s bearing from his own time spent at court. A noble, well educated and he could read the keen intelligence behind his eyes. In such a strange place, it was likely he was underestimated due to his age. Londo would not make such a mistake.
“It is a pleasure to meet you, young Octavian,” he said returning the nod. “No, not on official business, as I have not quite ascertained just what it is I am doing in such a place. Celestial notables, you say?"

[blond-bondshell.livejournal.com]

"I thought the point of being an Ambassador was that you were able to resolve conflicts with diplomacy, not suggesting to quietly dispose of people if it's convenient." Bond was by no means that naive, but the Ambassador's gauche comment rubbed him the wrong way. It was easy to say that an assassination could be arranged, but the amount of work that went into making it happen was staggering. Especially the quiet hits. Those required the most expertise and planning.

[centauri-londo.livejournal.com]

Londo shook his head. At times it was difficult to explain such basic cultural differences. Assassination was the way of the Centauri. Deal with your opponent openly when you are able. When that fails, resorting to more heavy-handed options was pratically a matter of tradition.

"Yes, yes, of course. Diplomacy is a fine tool, when it fits the situation. But if you wish to survive in the Centauri courts, you must be willing to back your words with actions as well as consequences."

[ninja-lizzy.livejournal.com]

As far as Elizabeth Bennet was concerned, talking openly of assassinations and the benefits of having power was quite a gauche thing to do. After all, while the gutting of ninjas was apparently appropriate for polite society (thank you, Seth Graham-Smith), it was Elizabeth's experience that deeds counted more than words. So she would not believe this man capable of assassinating anyone until she saw him deliver a freshly killed corpse.

What she did approve of were his thoughts on marriage.

"My mother would approve of your take on marriage," she said, eyes dancing. "Certainly it's best entered into when there is some actual gain for both parties. Unfortunately, I own it is impossible to convince impressionable young girls of that sort of thing, especially when there are attractive officers about."

She made him a curtsy and extended a gloved hand. "I am Miss Elizabeth Bennet, late of Longbourne."

[centauri-londo.livejournal.com]

Londo accepted the gloved hand and gave a courtly bow. The lovely young human woman was cultured, and obviously educated in the manner of nobility.

"It is a pleasure to meet you, Miss Bennet of Longbourne. I am Ambassador Londo Mollari of Centauri Prime. There are many young ladies of the Centauri court who feel the same way until they are presented with an opportunity that is as attractive as some poor young officers. Many become ruthless in their pursuit of power at a very young age."

He smiled, trying not to think of his own three (dreaded) wives.

[thranduils-son.livejournal.com]

Legolas looked the newest applicant over curiously, showing particular interest in his strange manner of attire and somewhat flamboyant hair style. He could tell this man was no more a human than he himself was -- Legolas being an Elf, as his pointed ears and fair features made obvious to those familiar with his kind.

He inclined his head in greeting, then asked Londo, "What are your duties as an Ambassador to Earth? I confess I've never heard of such a title, even in this place."

[centauri-londo.livejournal.com]

Londo turned to the elegant looking human and gave a small bow.
No, he was not a human, not exactly. His manner of movement reminded him a little of the Mimbari.

"I was sent from the Centauri Republic to live on Earth.. it is a world the humans live on and are from. And what world are you from? I can see that you are not human."

[ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com]

"Welcome, Ambassador!" the Hat said brightly. "What's 'spoo'?"

[centauri-londo.livejournal.com]

At the mention of one of his favorite dishes, Londo grinned, positively radiating good cheer, despite his strange circumstances. The liberal application of wine had likely also helped his mood. “Ah! Spoo is a delicacy served back home and it is quite possibly the most delicious food you could ever hope to sample. The creature spoo is made from is.. very small, and when they are harvested, they are pounded into a thick paste.” He raised his finger, “The key to good spoo is to age it well. When it is well aged, it is a wonderful dish served at every meal on Centauri Prime.”

Slytherin!

[ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com]

Your bribe has been accepted!

Welcome to Slytherin!