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It is a truth, universally acknowledged, that despite a young woman's possession of a calm and sensible temperament even at the best of times, if said woman comes to consciousness in a room surrounded by cases containing popcorn kernels and covered herself in a fine layer of grease, she will not take it well.
Such was the case for Elizabeth Bennet. The first thing she did upon her sudden wakefulness was to reach for her katana. To her dismay, however, she carried neither katana nor musket nor even ankle dagger.
"What mischief is this!" cried she in indignant tones. "Where can I be, weaponless and with no idea whether there are unmentionables about!"
Being a resourceful young woman, she endeavoured to clean the salt and butter from her person as much as possible. She had vague recollections of this place. Hogwarts, she thought it was called. She should go somewhere called Ravenclaw. Oh, yes, and Mr. Darcy was here. Of the scourge of unmentionables that had been plaguing England, she was less clear. It seemed to her she ought to remember if any of them were here, but she couldn't.
Well, there was nothing for it. She would sally forth from this room of popcorn kernels and see if she could locate someone she knew, even if that someone should be Mr. Darcy, and make them explain what the meaning of all this was. Then she resolved she would find a weapon and work off some of her excess energy by hunting Unmentionables. If there were no unmentionables--although why that should be the case given that there were *always* unmentionables--she supposed she might meditate and hope for a clear mind. And if there were no place in which she could meditate, she could always go write a letter to her dear friend, Charlotte Lucas, who she hoped had not been too stricken by the strange plague.
Thus satisfied with her plan, Elizabeth took herself away from the popcorn room, in as gay of spirits as she ever boasted. She did glance back over her shoulder in time to spot her name on the plaque of names outside the door. It was slowly fading, as was the name of Mr. Darcy. What this could mean, she was sure she didn't know, though she intended to find out. At swordpoint, should it come to that.
((For those of you who have not been alerted to my evil plans, I am taking Elizabeth from this version of Pride and Prejudice. I highly recommend this new ultraviolent version of Austen's comedy of manners to all lovers of crackfic, which, hopefully, you all are. Also, this is Brienne-mun, the one who is, OOCly, totally blind. Should anyone have time to hunt up appropriately kick-ass icons for this journal, I would be grateful...))
Such was the case for Elizabeth Bennet. The first thing she did upon her sudden wakefulness was to reach for her katana. To her dismay, however, she carried neither katana nor musket nor even ankle dagger.
"What mischief is this!" cried she in indignant tones. "Where can I be, weaponless and with no idea whether there are unmentionables about!"
Being a resourceful young woman, she endeavoured to clean the salt and butter from her person as much as possible. She had vague recollections of this place. Hogwarts, she thought it was called. She should go somewhere called Ravenclaw. Oh, yes, and Mr. Darcy was here. Of the scourge of unmentionables that had been plaguing England, she was less clear. It seemed to her she ought to remember if any of them were here, but she couldn't.
Well, there was nothing for it. She would sally forth from this room of popcorn kernels and see if she could locate someone she knew, even if that someone should be Mr. Darcy, and make them explain what the meaning of all this was. Then she resolved she would find a weapon and work off some of her excess energy by hunting Unmentionables. If there were no unmentionables--although why that should be the case given that there were *always* unmentionables--she supposed she might meditate and hope for a clear mind. And if there were no place in which she could meditate, she could always go write a letter to her dear friend, Charlotte Lucas, who she hoped had not been too stricken by the strange plague.
Thus satisfied with her plan, Elizabeth took herself away from the popcorn room, in as gay of spirits as she ever boasted. She did glance back over her shoulder in time to spot her name on the plaque of names outside the door. It was slowly fading, as was the name of Mr. Darcy. What this could mean, she was sure she didn't know, though she intended to find out. At swordpoint, should it come to that.
((For those of you who have not been alerted to my evil plans, I am taking Elizabeth from this version of Pride and Prejudice. I highly recommend this new ultraviolent version of Austen's comedy of manners to all lovers of crackfic, which, hopefully, you all are. Also, this is Brienne-mun, the one who is, OOCly, totally blind. Should anyone have time to hunt up appropriately kick-ass icons for this journal, I would be grateful...))
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Date: 2009-05-01 05:58 pm (UTC)Oh! Hi!
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Date: 2009-05-01 09:58 pm (UTC)"Hello," she said, bending down to pet Wishbone, should he permit it.
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Date: 2009-05-01 10:54 pm (UTC)He trotted up to Elizabeth so he could be petted.
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Date: 2009-05-01 11:51 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-05-01 11:59 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 2009-05-01 06:03 pm (UTC)Sort of. He wasn't a zombie now. He was a sanguine and amiable neurologist, possessed of nothing more sinister than a wicked dry sense of humor.
"You're missing your unmentionables? That can't be comfortable, ma'am."
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Date: 2009-05-01 10:07 pm (UTC)She laughed now, and said lightly, "You will not give offense if I do not speak to you of my unmentionables, I hope. We have, after all, not been introduced." She made him a curtsy. "I am Miss Elizabeth Bennet, and I have no idea how I came to be here, or even what this place is."
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Date: 2009-05-01 11:36 pm (UTC)"And for my part, I do not wish to give offense. But what is meant by 'unmentionables', in English, is something other than what you perhaps meant? To the best of my knowledge, that is. English is not my first language, and the translation enchantment here isn't completely perfect."
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Date: 2009-05-01 11:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-05-02 12:07 am (UTC)"Zombies?"
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Date: 2009-05-02 12:48 am (UTC)"Well, hel-lo, beautiful!" he called.
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((I have two icons for you on photobucket, follow the links: a crop from the cover (http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d134/per1etwo/lj%20icons/perletwo_lizzyzombie2.gif) and Lizzy with her dagger (http://i34.photobucket.com/albums/d134/per1etwo/lj%20icons/perletwo_lizzyzombie1.gif). Off to watch Dollhouse now, BBL!))
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Date: 2009-05-02 01:13 am (UTC)((Thank you so much! As a token of my grattitude, please take this shiny Internet.))
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Date: 2009-05-02 02:03 am (UTC)He waited for Lizzy to recognize the name. They always did.
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Date: 2009-05-02 02:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-05-02 03:16 am (UTC)He shook his head. "Nah. I'm new here myself. If you weren't at my Sorting, I probably haven't met you yet. This place is huge."
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Date: 2009-05-04 03:56 am (UTC)"If you're concerned for your safety, may I offer you my protection?"
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Date: 2009-05-04 04:06 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-05-04 04:25 am (UTC)"I think my Special Forces training seems tame in comparison. Still, with any luck, neither of should need to get our hands dirty." He held back his jacket for just long enough for Lizzy to see the Walther holstered at his left side. "Never mind that the undead seem to be in short supply at Hogwarts. Is that what you're afraid of?"
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Date: 2009-05-04 05:00 am (UTC)She shook her head a little and briskly got back to the discussion at hand. "Yes. There are hordes of the undead where I come from," she answered. "Though I have been given to understand that that is not the case here."
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Date: 2009-05-04 05:06 am (UTC)Damn that topic at hand. "I know several people who have been dead." He'd been responsible for three of them. "However, they're in perfect health now."
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