Unpopping of Bart Allen

[impulsivekid.livejournal.com]

You what what the really, really horrible thing about popcorn is? The absolutely worst possible in every single way thing? The one thing that, above all others, makes people cringe, and brings death and destruction upon the world?

Oil is slippery.

And the worst part about Newton? Is that his laws are irreversible.

Which might explain why there is a what amounts to a human pinball, moving at barely visible speeds ricocheting around the castle, slick with the butter, and having tried to start up at full speed.

He's also yelling something that sounds suspiciously like "Yahoooooooooooooo!"

Comments

[busty-robin.livejournal.com]

Question: What's faster than the speed of light, covered in butter, and yelling 'yahooo'?

No, really. There's no puns here - this is a genuine question. Because the second she saw the yellow and red blur, Steph naturally thought 'Oh, Bart must be in town'. Only this wasn't town, this was Hogwarts. So Bart couldn't possibly be here, because dear sweet Martian Manhunter, Impulse with access to magic was just...it was bad. It was its own descriptor. It was Impulse with access to magic.

Did you feel a shudder? Just give it time.

"Bart?," she called out, not bothering to try and keep up with the possible-end-to-Hogwarts'-existence.

[impulsivekid.livejournal.com]

His name! Someone called his name. Someone back there. That he just went by again. So, back there. Damn slippery oil, he has such a hard time stopping. So, back, that way, right? Okay, how the heck did he get on the ceiling? Seriously now.

But, Wait! He has magic! A wand around here somewhere, right? "Wingardium, Leviosa!"

Behold, a floating Bart, hanging in front of Steph, upside down, and grinning. "Hi Spoiler!"

[busty-robin.livejournal.com]

Shit. He already knew how to float. Impulse could fly. This was a code mauve, people! This was not a drill. I repeat, a code mauve.

Still, it was good to see someone from home. Home home, not the pre-robin era young Bruce had been from. Even if that someone would probably give her an ulcer before the week was out. "Hi Impulse," she said, grinning back. "I'm actually going by Steph, here. Ex-nay on the ape-cay talk. Comprende?"

[impulsivekid.livejournal.com]

Of course he can fly. he's from the 30th century, he has a Legion ring, duh. But he's doing nothing to right himself. The blood rushing to his ehad feels kind of cool. "Okay Steph. What's an Ape-cay? Is that one of those talking ape guys from that hidden ape city, with the talking apes and the mental powers and such?"

Whee! He starts to spin in the air, his hair flying wildly. "I don't think I've ever met an ape-cay, I was an ape once, there was this thing, turned everyone into apes, and I was Chimpulse for a time, but it wasn't as much fun as you'd think it was."

[busty-robin.livejournal.com]

Bart's pre-existing ability to fly? Something Steph can die happy, not knowing about. And oh lord. Impulse rants. She'd almost forgotten about the rants! Steph tried to follow the mid-air spinning with her eyes, before getting a liiiiittle motion sick.

Chimpulse? "What? No. No apes. That was an ape-free sentence on my part. Ape-cay is pig latin. Which," she adds quickly "-is not a special language spoken only by pigs. It just means that I'm going for the whole civilian identity thing. So be sure not to mention any costumed escapades on my part, okay?"

[impulsivekid.livejournal.com]

"Then, why do they call it pig latin?" Somehow, he gets right side up again. Don't ask how, it's Impulse, he does these things. Sometimes. Sometimes not. "When did you get here? Wow, my memories are all fuzzy, I remember learning magic, but not who taught me, or anything that I should remotely know at all! It's like I was here before, but it wasn't me controlling me then but a different me, who had to stop being me, so another me could be me, and I could be here with you, now!"

The cool thing about super speed is you can take breaths so no one notices and it just sounds like you keep talking. "Aww, no costume? But yours was such a lovely shade of eggplant!"

[busty-robin.livejournal.com]

Hmm. Good question. "I don't really know. I'd say ask Tim, but he's not exactly here." Oof. Saying the T-word aloud still kind of made her gut drop. "I got here a couple of months ago. After my, um...something that happens in your future, I think." Where Steph came from, Bart was now rocking the Kid Flash costume. To be honest, she thought the Impulse gear suited him better. And damned if she could piece together Bart’s own personal Hogwarts: a History. "Er- well, I'm definitely glad you're here."

And she became significantly gladder after Bart used the e-word. Steph's mouth dropped open, as she was awash with sheer gratitude. Eggplant! Not purple, not purple-ish, not kind-of-sort-of purple. Eggplant. No one ever got it right! "Thank you," she whispered. Then, clearing her throat: "Well, I still suit up sometimes, when I'm training. Or if I'm going into the city, on patrol." Hey - everyone had long nights! "But the crime around here is pretty minimal." And yes, she did sound just a bit disappointed at that fact. "But I live here, too. I couldn't be in costume 24/7."

[mischief-george.livejournal.com]

Wow. Whatever that was, it smelled distinctly of popcorn, was covered in oil, and was flying down the halls at a breakneck speed. So either Snape had discovered the wonders of Pick-up Potion and was now higher than a Snitch, or someone interesting had just broken from the ranks of the popcorned.

Grinning, leaning against a wall with his hands thrust in his pockets, watching the bloke bounce around with interest, George called out, "Oy! Need a hand?"

[impulsivekid.livejournal.com]

"Need a broomstick! A staff! A large fluffy pillow! Anything that will stop my mooooooooooovement!" This is said between passes, as trying to go in a straight line is just stupid.

And then bart starts moving in tighter and tighter circles. Eventually, he's going to run into himself, and that will be bad, mmmkay?

[mischief-george.livejournal.com]

Chuckling a little, George shouted back, "No worries, mate! Have you stopped in a second." Then, pulling out a Dungbomb from his pocket - hey, a bloke had to be prepared - he muttered a quick spell. The Dungbomb puffed out and grew into a gigantic pillow nearly the size of the hallway. At the right moment, he shoved it in front of Bart.

Hopefully he'd done the spell right, so when the boy impacted the pillow, the most they'd be subjected to would be an explosion of feathers. It would probably be a bad thing if the smell of the Dungbomb remained.

[impulsivekid.livejournal.com]

GAFLUMP!

"Whoo, thanks for the stop!" Bart lifts his feet, a gooey oily mess dripping from the soles. "I dunno what this gunk is, but it doesn't slow down for nothing. You know, I bet you could use it on a skateboard and get some real distance on jumps and stuff, if ti worked right. Hi there, I'm Impulse, but you can call me Bart, I used to school here, but then my mind went all fuzzy, and now I'm back, and I'm a superhero, but not here and now cause you guys really don't need one, so I'm learning magic, cause it's awesome."

[mischief-george.livejournal.com]

If there was one person in the world who could follow something like that without blinking, it would be George Weasley. He might not talk that fast, himself, but his brain was definitely moving at that speed much of the time (especially when there was some fun to be had). So, with a grin, he held out his hand. "George Weasley of Weasley Wizarding Wheezes. Simply corking to meet you. And welcome back from the realm of popcorn. Here." He reached in his pocket and pulled out a small square of fabric, which he shook once to turn it into something more the size of a bath towel. "Use this to clean off a bit, if you like. It's called a Rapid Refresh. Wipe yourself off with it, and it'll make you sparkling and clean. Useful when you need to get rid of evidence in a flash, yeah?"

Wait. "You're a superhero?"

[impulsivekid.livejournal.com]

George probably doesn't even feel the towel being taken before it is handed back, all dirty and used, Bart now sparkling clean. Speed, baby, speed. "Oh, yeah, I'm a superhero, only a junior grade right now, but my grandfather was the first Flash, technically the second Flash, but the first Flash from Earth one, but since the Crisis there's only one Earth, which doesn't explain this place, and my father will be a superhero too, but he hasn't been born yet, but then niether have I, so, yes, Superhero."

[mischief-george.livejournal.com]

"Do you have a cape?" It was the important questions, really, that sprang to mind first. "And who in Merlin's name is 'Flash'?"

[aquilus-albel.livejournal.com]

Albel narrowed his eyes as someone moved past him at a positively ludicrous speed. Smelled like butter. Ah. That explained it; Albel himself had slid into the opposite wall when he was unpopcorned.

However, being freshly unpopcorned was, in Albel's mind, no excuse for disturbing him in his aimless walk around the castle. "What are you doing, fool?" he shouted after whoever-it-was.

[impulsivekid.livejournal.com]

"Trying to stop! I don't have any traction, and it's getting really hard to whoooooa!" As his feet go out from under him, he goes sliding down a hall and into a wall. "Owww."

[aquilus-albel.livejournal.com]

Albel shook his head. Was that a twinge of sympathy he felt for the kid? He ambled over and gave him a hand up. "Same thing happened to me," he muttered gruffly.

[impulsivekid.livejournal.com]

Bart accepts the hand up. "You ran into a wall at supersonic speeds? Wow!" Very literal, our Bart.

[aquilus-albel.livejournal.com]

Albel's lips moved slowly as he worked out what Bart meant. Supersonic travel hadn't been invented yet on Elicoor, and it had been old news in the rest of the galaxy by the time he got off-planet.

"Not that fast, no. Felt like it, though." He rubbed his head, although it'd probably been a good month since he'd shown up. "The name's Albel. Albel Nox."

[impulsivekid.livejournal.com]

Bart offers a hand. "Impulse. I'm a superhero! And, I guess I'm a wizard now, too."

[aquilus-albel.livejournal.com]

Albel started to take the hand with his claw, then remembered and switched to his right hand. He still had to consciously remember to do that sometimes, even seven years later - he'd been left-handed. "Superhero? What's that?"

[chaotic-miles.livejournal.com]

Hmmm. There was a young man running around the castle at amazing speeds and shrieking. This probably meant he was the one person who was more hyperactive than Miles himself.

"Hey!" he called. "Are you in a hurry to get somewhere?"

[impulsivekid.livejournal.com]

"IIIII CAAAAAANNNNNN'TTTTT SSSSSTTTTOOOOOPPPPPPPP!!" The man in question hits a wall, and falls down. "Ow."

[chaotic-miles.livejournal.com]

Miles approached the fallen man and offered him a hand up. "That... could definitely be a problem," he remarked. "Does this kind of thing happen to you a lot?"

[impulsivekid.livejournal.com]

Kid, really. "Not usually, I usually have a lot more control over my-" There is, suddenly, a yellow energy version of Bart standing above him. "Boss, Boss! You gotta not- oh, damn, wrong one, sorry! And is gone.

"Dang it."