Owl to Adam

[lilypotter60.livejournal.com]

Owl, heavily warded, hexed to turn into sawdust if opened by anyone other than Adam



Dear Adam,

I realize that the proper way to go about this would be to secure some sort of introduction, so I apologize in advance for the oddness of this. I am an acquaintance of Anthony Crowley and he had mentioned your name to me. I was hoping I could speak to you regarding a situation my family and mates are having to deal with.

I doubt Anthony has mentioned me, so I realize this is out of the blue. I'd rather not go into the details via owl - even wards can be broken. However, any time you could give me would be most appreciated.

Thank you.

Sincerely,
Lily Evans Potter

Comments

Owl that simply cannot be opened by anyone other than Lily

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Lily,

It's all right. I don't 'zactly stand on formality.

Crowley hasn't mentioned your name to me, but that's not much of a surprise. I'm always glad to meet someone new, though. I'm free to talk now, if you like. I dunno how concerned you are 'bout security, so we could meet in one of our rooms, or go walkin' or flyin' outside. Whatever you like, really.

-Adam

Return owl, heavily warded and charmed to turn into a water goblet if opened by other than Adam

[lilypotter60.livejournal.com]

Adam ~

Well, that's actually a good thing, as I haven't had much opportunity in my life to be formal and would probably muck it up eventually. So I'm glad we're on the same page.

Outside is fine. By the lake? I - er, hm. Well, I don't know what you look like and I can only assume you haven't a clue who I am. I'll be wearing a wizarding robe and have red hair - and will probably look exceedingly nervous. You'll be able to spot me, I'm sure. There are a few muffling charms I know that will make our conversation private and, if need should arise, it's easier to defend myself with room to maneuver.

And, sadly, I'm not much of a flier. But I would enjoy a walk. I'll be waiting.

Thank you, again.

~ Lily

---

The owl sent, Lily made her way down to the lake. Pacing back and forth, her wand in her hand and tapping absently on her leg, Lily waited.

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Having received Lily's owl, Adam made straight for the lake. He didn't need the description to recognize her and she likely wouldn't need one either. People always seemed to recognize Adam. He seemed to radiate Adam-ness. What she'd actually see was an exceptionally handsome young man her own age who looked something like a Greek god. Or maybe a Biblical illustration, one which showed muscular angels doing some righteous smiting. It was a face that didn't belong in the twenty-first century. It was thatched with golden curls which glowed. Michelangelo should have sculpted it. He probably would not have included the battered trainers, frayed jeans, or grubby T shirt, though.

Stopping at a decent distance from the redhead, Adam smiled. "Hi, Lily. 'm Adam. Nice to meet you."

[lilypotter60.livejournal.com]

Lily turned, her wand raising of its own accord before she realized who had spoken and lowered it again. She smiled and walked towards him, holding out her hand, "Adam. Thank you for seeing me."

Her first thought was that Anthony had been right. There did seem to be something about this man that radiated an 'all is well' vibe. Her second thought, which made her feel slightly guilty for doubting Adam when he'd been so kind as to reply to her unusual owl, was to quickly test the wards around her mind. As a fairly skilled Occlumens, Lily had the ability to protect her thoughts and emotions from being read. Occlumency wasn't something Lily had practiced since coming back to Hogwarts and it felt odd to her to be using it again. However, Anthony had mentioned several times that he possessed the talent to read thoughts and feelings. Lily hadn't a clue if her Occlumency skill would fend off the magic that Anthony, and, apparently, Aziraphale, used or if Adam even had that particular ability. But it was what she could do, so she gamely checked and double checked even as her eyes studied Adam.

"Er, would you like some tea?" It was Lily's standard response when she felt nervous or out of place. Offer tea.

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Adam took her hand and shook it, contracting his enormous aura to fit snugly around just the two of them and focusing all his massive attention on her.

"It's no problem at all. And some tea would be great, thanks."

Lily needn't have bothered with her checks. As an omniscient being, some part of Adam knew everything about everything. However, most of the rest of Adam was involved in ignoring that part and trying to live as normally as possible, which meant a conscious choice to avoid mind or emotion reading. He couldn't help but watch her aura flicker, though, and knew she was doing protective magic. That was all right, though. He didn't take it personally.

"So, what's up? What can I help you with?" he asked cheerfully.

[lilypotter60.livejournal.com]

Lily couldn't help but grin. Adam was nothing if not friendly, which was nice. Quickly muttering a spell, she brought up two large mugs, charmed to fill with the sort of tea each would like best. Handing one to Adam, she took a long drink of hers, using the time to best phrase the question. Finally deciding that in for a knute, in for a pound, she cast a quick muffling spell and began.

"This sounds a bit mad, I'm sure," she said ruefully. She couldn't quite meet his eyes, instead focusing on the cup in her hand. "But Anthony had implied you may be able to give me some answers..." She trailed off and shrugged. "I don't know how much you know about me, or what you may have heard. I won't bore you with the details, but sufficed to say that around a month and a half ago, by my reckoning, I died at the hands of a man calling himself Lord Voldemort."

She didn't shudder at the name, which was a step forward from where she'd been a week ago. Instead her voice got hard and she looked up at Adam, her eyes angry. Not at him, but at the whole situation. "Voldemort killed me, killed my husband, and tried to kill my infant son. Thank Merlin, he failed at that, at least. Now, as I said, in my mind this was not yet two months ago. Trouble is, it's actually closer to twenty years. I came back here, for Merlin knows what reason and by what means, to discover that my mates had grown old, my son had grown up, and my husband had also returned, but from four years in my past and without any knowledge of our life together."

She paused and took a breath. "Calm, Evans," she told herself. "This bloke is trying to help. No need to reveal how nutters you are." She forced a smile and took another drink of tea. "All that to say this: Voldemort is back. He became unpopcorned or whatever the bloody hell you call it. And I'm...concerned," yes that was a good word for it, "about what he may be able to do. To my son. To my mates. I want to know if you know anything about him, what he's planning, so I can protect the people I love." She watched him, desperate hope in her eyes. She honestly thought this was a dead end - how could this young man, despite Anthony's extolling of his virtues, tell her anything she didn't know? But she had to try. She was sick of being afraid and she was willing to do most anything to have some assurance that her family wasn't going to be ripped apart again.

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Adam sipped carefully at his mint tea, listening intently to Lily's story. Never taking his eyes off her face, he made the air around them soothing and comfortable and when she was done, he paused a minute to figure out what to say.

"Well, first off, I know you're not mad, so don't you go worryin' about that. I know what happened and that you're not lyin' or exaggeratin'."

He sighed. This was going to be the hard bit. "And before I tell you anythin' else, I hafta explain somethin' so that you know where we stand. I'm a neutral party, which means I'm willin' to help anyone in the school regardless of who they are. So, I'll help you, but I'll help Voldemort, too. I don't get involved in good or evil or right or wrong for a lot of reasons. That doesn't mean I like what he stood for or what he did, but I do like him, 'cos I like everybody and judgin' isn't up to me. I'm not a spy and won't tell him anythin' you tell me in confidence, just as I won't tell you anythin' he said in confidence. Completely neutral, right?"

Adam studied Lily's face again after his explanation, trying to get a sense of what she was thinking without being intrusive. Confident she at least understood, even if she didn't seem too pleased with the concept, he continued.

"So, that said, I was here when Voldemort was here the first time. When he was a professor and had all his Death Eaters around and people were bein' turned into werewolves and bein' threatened in sortin's. Then they all got turned into popcorn." If Adam had anything to do with that, he wasn't saying. "And I was there the day that Voldemort got unpopcorned (http://community.livejournal.com/hogwarts_hocus/677809.html?thread=32158129#t32158129), and he doesn't seem to remember anythin' about what happened at Hogwarts before." Another fortunate coincidence that Adam didn't mention. "We talked a bit about bein' at school and what he should and shouldn't do. Then we exchanged some owls (http://community.livejournal.com/hogwarts_hocus/692594.html?thread=32697714#t32697714) about classes and books."

He scuffed a toe into the dirt. "See, what you've gotta know about Voldemort is that without his followers or the ability to kill anybody, he's not really scary. Most of the new people at the school who don't know what he did before don't find him intimidatin' or like to show off by standin' up to him. The only people who are scared of him are you and your friends and family and that where he's gettin' all his power from. It's your choice if you want to keep givin' him that."

Adam looked directly into her eyes. "I can promise you this. So long as you and everyone you care about is at the school, no one else is goin' to die. I can't promise no one'll get hurt; like if he gets on the Slytherin Quidditch team and hits a bludger at James or somethin', but no more flashin' green lights. You and Harry and Ginny and Ron and James and Remus and Sirius and Sarah and everyone are safe." And it was said with such conviction, such quiet assurance, such confidence, that it would be difficult not to believe. Adam truly had the power to back up what he was saying.

[lilypotter60.livejournal.com]

Lily listened carefully. Her first instinct to Adam's statement that he was neutral, willing to help both herself and Voldemort, was to walk away. This had been a bad idea. But something made her stay, made her hear Adam out. She put it down to the fact that she had dragged the poor man out here and forced him to listen to her tale of woe - least she could do was not storm off like a petulant child because she didn't get the answer she'd wanted.

She met Adam's eyes and nodded slightly to indicate she'd heard. Then she moved away - just a little, just to give herself some breathing room. Her mind was busy analyzing and dissecting everything Adam had told her. After a few long minutes spent staring out over the Lake, her arms wrapped around herself, Lily turned back to Adam and smiled. A real smile, without an edge of sadness or the haunted look she'd had since Voldemort had returned.

"Fear of a name increases fear of the thing itself," she said softly, to herself, then laughed. "You're right," she said to Adam, grinning. "I'm so tired of being afraid, of jumping at shadows. And for what? A wizard who's biggest threat is death. He killed me once, he took away everything once. But I'm giving it away this time. I'm letting him hurt me."

She shook her head, "Careful and cautious is one thing. But my son doesn't go outside, Ginny is frightened of everything, and I - " here she paused, a look of disgust with herself crossing her face. "I've been so obsessed with my death that I've forgotten that I have a second chance at a life."

Hesitating just a moment, she walked over to Adam and gave him a hug. "Thank you," she said, sounding surprised. Pulling away she grinned at him. "Well, I guess I can put this down to another thing Anthony was right about, yeah? Getting to be quite a list."

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Watching Lily walk away, Adam said nothing, sensing that she needed time. For quiet minutes he watched the water and kept his thoughts to himself. There was nothing that he could or should add, so he simply waited, not pressuring, just standing. It was all her choice now.

When she returned and smiled, Adam felt a great weight lift from his chest. With no influence from him, she'd come to the conclusion he'd hoped she'd draw. He hugged back enthusiastically. "Dumbledore once told Harry that it was his choices that made him what he was, just as yours do you and mine do me. For what it's worth, I think you're makin' the right one, Lily. He can't hurt you any more than he already has, yet you're all still here, and that's what counts."

Then he laughed heartily. "But please don't tell Crowley he was right again. It happens a lot, but he's got a big enough head as it is. We don't need it gettin' any bigger."

[lilypotter60.livejournal.com]

Lily laughed, "Oh, don't worry. Wouldn't dream of mentioning it to him." Her face darkened slightly - she wouldn't be mentioning anything to Anthony, not for a while. She'd mucked that up good and well. A slight sigh and she pushed that thought aside. They'd figure it out. First, her family and mates. Then she'd worry about new friendships.

"Dumbledore was a wise man," she said, smiling just a little sadly. "A great wizard, good friend. At least, he was when I knew him."

Then she laughed again, "Merlin, I feel so...good. Happy, even. It's a nice feeling. I mean, I'm still afraid - I think the fear will be there for a while, yet. But I can live with it. It's not running my every thought. And I feel like I can plan, think, live, now, without constantly looking over my shoulder." She studied him a moment, her head cocked in thought. She appeared to be evaluating him, her eyes meeting Adam's as she put together her impressions.

Then, smiling widely, she said, "Thank you, Adam. For meeting me, for talking with me. Thank you. Not many would do that for a stranger."

[average-adam.livejournal.com]

Adam allowed the frank assessment with a faint smile. "No, I kinda think I'm one of a kind... But I'm real glad I could help and that you feel better. You can come talk to me any time you like. Do you think the others will understand as well?"

He looked back toward the school and released his aura to spring back to its normal, all encompassing size. It was just in case. He didn't want to miss anything important.

Then turning back to Lily, he said, "You're gonna run into him sometime, you know. And it prob'ly will be scary. But I have the feelin' you'll be strong and feel good about your choices afterward. Once you've defeated him, even if it's just with words, I don't think you'll prob'ly ever feel powerless again."

Adam flashed a smile, bright as the sun. "I'll see you around, then?"

[lilypotter60.livejournal.com]

"I'll make the others understand," Lily laughed. "I'm quite stubborn, I'm afraid."

She smiled back at Adam, her grin wide and easy. "I certainly hope so. If you'd ever like a cuppa, just send me an owl."

Another laugh and Lily lowered the muffling charm, waved goodbye, and headed back up to the castle.