Application for The Mad Hatter [Belial], Angel Sanctuary

[all-madhere.livejournal.com]

1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite? ...That's a weird question. I wasn't told that I'd be asked about cheese, of all things. But I'm not going to try to weasel out of it, oh no. My favorite cheese is goat cheese.

2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop? Carrottop. As a redhead myself, I can't have some twat giving us all a bad name. But I'll happily do away with Barney too, after I've disposed of Carrottop.

3. What time is it where you are? You know, no two clocks ever say the exact same thing at the exact time. Bearing that in mind, can anyone ever truly know what time it is, really?

It's dark out, for whatever that's worth to you.

4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black. Oooh. Now this question, I like. While I'd like the chance to sample them all, if forced to choose only one, it would most likely be Ginny Weasley. I do so love adorable, spirited little girls. I'd go into more detail, but I'm under very specific instructions from my Lord to not, and I'm quoting, "creep everybody out."

5. If you are pushing to be in:

A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
The Slithy Toves.

6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
Ooh, now here's another question I like. I can give you anything you want. Well, almost anything, anyway. Normally, there's a price for such requests, but since this is a bribe, I suppose I can give you one "on the house," as they say. Obviously, there are limits to my abilities, but not many. If you need someone knocked off, say, or need something you can't get, come up and see me sometime.

Comments

[all-madhere.livejournal.com]

Seriously, I'm neither. I don't have the parts to be either.

[dungbombsrule.livejournal.com]

*Winces* You went that far, huh? But were you a girl baby or a boy baby?

[all-madhere.livejournal.com]

*sigh* Humans never do seem to get it. They just don't like it when gender is blurred too heavily.

I was a neither baby who started to become a girl and stopped halfway through.

[dungbombsrule.livejournal.com]

So you're a girl, then. Thank you. Alright, you can be in Slytherin, no problem. But I'm going to call you up on your bribe. Can you help me find this thing? (http://www.ssww.com/store/product/sku=EL632/cmc=BRWSEDURESINF/grp=EDU/sbgrp=RES/ln=INF/i=1/)

[all-madhere.livejournal.com]

*perplexed head shaking* Sure. Fine. A girl. If that's what makes you happy.

Of course I can. Dare I ask why you want to find it, though?

[dungbombsrule.livejournal.com]

*Ron is just so relieved that the creepy person asking about Ginny is a girl. What harm could come of that, right?*

Uh, because I lost it. *He blushes* It was a present from my girlfriend. But it always stared at me...

[all-madhere.livejournal.com]

*smirk* Here you go, kid. *tosses him the animal*

Slytherin

[dungbombsrule.livejournal.com]

Aaagh! *He catches it and swiftly looks away. He seems almost disappointed* Gee, thanks.

Re: Slytherin

[all-madhere.livejournal.com]

Any time, dear boy. *catches the disappointed look, but choose to avoid commenting*

Re: Slytherin

[dungbombsrule.livejournal.com]

Uh, you got this back from Malfoy, right? He was the one who stole it! *Ron actually left it behind at the Three Broomsticks, but he doesn't remember that*

Re: Slytherin

[all-madhere.livejournal.com]

*shrug* Does it matter. *actually conjured a replica out of thin air* You have it back. Does it matter where I got it?

Re: Slytherin

[dungbombsrule.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it does! I'm sick of Malfoy making things tough for me and the people I care about!

Re: Slytherin

[all-madhere.livejournal.com]

Then yes, I got it from Malfoy. Happy?

Re: Slytherin

[dungbombsrule.livejournal.com]

I knew it! *Stomps away*

::Screened for Ron and Ginny::

[ginevram.livejournal.com]

Ron? Do you really think it's okay for this person to be in Slytherin?

Re: ::Screened for Ron and Ginny::

[dungbombsrule.livejournal.com]

Huh? Well, I already accepted her bribe so I can't really go back. Why, what's the problem?

Re: ::Screened for Ron and Ginny::

[ginevram.livejournal.com]

But Ron, she wants to do something to me that would creep people out!

Re: ::Screened for Ron and Ginny::

[dungbombsrule.livejournal.com]

She's a girl, Ginny. Be a little sensitive. I'm not creeped out by all the guys hanging off each other, am I?

Re: ::Screened for Ron and Ginny::

[ginevram.livejournal.com]

What does her being a girl have to do with it? I don't want a girl molesting me any more than I want a bloke molesting me. And as for those guys, they're not trying to hang on you, are they?

Re: ::Screened for Ron and Ginny::

[dungbombsrule.livejournal.com]

*He doesn't answer that* Ginny? Relax, alright? I won't let anything happen to you by that big, scary girl. *He rolls his eyes*

Re: ::Screened for Ron and Ginny::

[ginevram.livejournal.com]

*Looks very annoyed.*

Ron, what does her being a girl have to do with anything? You have a fit if Harry so much as brushes against me, but you couldn't care less what this girl, who we don't even know, does to me?

Re: ::Screened for Ron and Ginny::

[dungbombsrule.livejournal.com]

Ok, Ginny, first off, you have got to get the facts straight. I'm fine with Harry brushing against you, snogging and that... but I still think that you two living together is way too old for you. You don't see me moving in with Primavera. And if you are having a shag, I don't see why I have to know about it!

As for you and a girl... I dunno, I think it would be sorta cute.

Re: ::Screened for Ron and Ginny::

[ginevram.livejournal.com]

All right, I was exaggerating a bit. And point - what you don't know won't bother you, which is why we're always very careful with the silencing charms. I'll just make a note that you're fine with us "snogging and that..." so it won't come up again, right?

*looks horrified* Ronald Weasley! In the first place, I wouldn't cheat on Harry with anyone. In the second place, I don't like girls that way. In the third place, ewwwww! I can't believe you're imagining your sister with another girl! Eeeewwwwww! Harry hasn't suggested something like that, has he? I mean, I know boys talk about things, and all, but ...

Re: ::Screened for Ron and Ginny::

[dungbombsrule.livejournal.com]

Well, it will come up if you keep going heavy snogging right in front of me. That's sorta gross, Ginny. Not to mention excluding. Suddenly you and Harry can't talk anymore, and what can I do except leave or stare? So, yeah, if you do that, it might come up again, but not just because it's all slimy but because it's just rude to do that when there's only one other person in the room. Stop being a kid about it.

*Ron's imaginings involve a lot of hand-holding and giggling. And the color pink. No public exchanges of saliva or gropings. Paradise* What? You asked me if it bothered me, and it doesn't. I think it would be sweet.

...I didn't think you'd react so strongly against it. You know, Ginny, if you want to talk...

Re: ::Screened for Ron and Ginny::

[ginevram.livejournal.com]

When did we last snog in front of you? That is not all we do. In fact, the last time we were all together was at the picnic, and Harry and I didn't snog at all there! We do our snogging in private, now that we can.

*Ginny now thinks her brother, who she formerly considered extremely naive, must be getting awfully kinky lately. Well, there is someone new in his life, so maybe Primavera's into that and influencing him. But she's still very offended that he'd think of her cheating on Harry, and besides, the girl who's applying obviously wants to do things that are very much not sweet.*

Sweet? Ron, you actually think it'd be sweet for me to cheat on Harry, and that a girl who wants to do things that would creep people out doing something to your sister is sweet?!