Due to the fact that I am really fucking bored, I'm now holding office hours. Come by to chat if you have a question about class, your homework assignment, or if you're just really fucking bored, too.
Crowley looked up, surprised at hearing the familiar voice.
"John. They really will let anyone in, won't they? What the fuck are you doing here? Come to terrify my students for the amusement factor? Or just continuing your fine tradition in messing around in other people's business?"
"Who, me?" John snorted. "Mate, if that Fenrir character's not enough to scare them off then I don't stand a fucking chance." He shoved aside a trowel and an odd lumpy paperweight to plop down on the edge of Crowley's desk and make himself comfortable, snickering at the official-looking plaque that read 'Professor Anthony J. Crowley.'
"Who'da thought, you going all repectable and shit...so what're you working on? Geraniums? Christ, I'm flashing back to the sodding Bog God here. Couldn't you at least teach the poor blighters something useful?"
"All they have to worry about with Fenrir is the chance of being eaten once a month. They have to look at your ugly mug every day."
Crowley smirked. "I am teaching them something useful. How not to piss me off mostly. But we've covered poisonous plants and some of the more... interesting magical varieties. Didn't think it'd be a bright idea to send the kids back to their dorms with Devil's Snare, though, no matter how much I might want to."
"Well why not? Great way to find out which ones have actually been doing their assigned reading, and as for the rest, well, the place can always use a few new ghosts, don't you think? Anyway, if you really want to get their attention, why not a lab practical on the properties and uses of cannabis?" John grinned cheerfully. "Bet if you looked around there's a few magical varieties out there that'd make for a fascinating study."
At Kira's greeting, he turned and firmly shook the proferred hand. "Pleasure to meet you, Lunanatkira. Name's John Constantine. Yeah, me and Crowley go way back. Though I'm not sure 'friends' is exactly the right word--'fellow bastards who haven't quite got around to killing each other yet' might be nearer the mark." He chuckled.
"I think the students know enough about the properties and uses of cannabis, seeing as several of them have offered it as a bribe during their sortings."
Crowley rolled his eyes at the interaction between John and Kira and gave the man a significant glance. If he found out that the kid was supposedly a reincarnation of Lucifer and Crowley hadn't told him yet, there would be hell to pay.
"Yeah? Could you make me a list?" John said, then caught Crowley's look and raised his eyebrows slightly in response, wondering what he was going to hear about this kid when said kid was no longer present. Kira seemed personable enough, but in his experience, it was never a good sign when someone stumbled over introducing themselves.
"So Kira, what's your House?" he asked casually. It was still a bit of an embarrassment to have landed in Hufflepuff, and he hoped to Hell Crowley didn't ask him about it (no need to ask which House he'd got Sorted into. Parseltongue being his native language and all.) But he wasn't noble enough for Gryffindor, political enough for Slytherin or bookish enough for Ravenclaw, so there it was. It wasn't all bad, he supposed. Being characterized as excessively loyal made for a nice change of pace.
Well. Ask a stupid question, John thought with an inward sigh. "It's John. Just...John. Or Constantine, if you like. And, uh." He felt his face going red and cussed silently, fiddling restlessly with his cigarette lighter, then cleared his throat and said as matter-of-factly as possible, "I'm in Hufflepuff."
Don't say it, wanker, don't you dare say a fucking word, he thought ferociously, not looking in Crowley's direction.
Crowley smirked a big evil smirk. Internally. He wasn't going to lose this opportunity to take the mickey out of John. He got the chance so rarely.
"Hufflepuff," he said mildly, keeping his face expressionless. "I understand that house is known for being fair, just, earnest, hard-working and loyal..."
"Yeah," John shot back, "which is why we'll listen politely as some cocky bastard from another House talks shit about ours before we break our backs delivering a well-earned arse-kicking with all due solemnity."
Finally laughing, Crowley said, "I'd like to see you try, you candy-arsed git. Slytherins are cunning and will do whatever it takes to win. Plus we're damn good looking."
"And damn heavy, when what you've cunningly won is the drinking contest your Hufflepuff mates earnestly advised you not to enter," John retorted. "Oh, you forgot conceited, by the way. Anyway, I've seen a few of the other Slytherins, I wouldn't be so quick to generalize about the good looks..."
"Obviously," John said wryly. "Rowena's not really my type though. She's a looker, yeah, but I make it a point never to date a woman with twice my IQ. Makes for some pretty awkward conversations. 'Hullo, Rowena luv, what've you been up to?' 'Well, John, I've just been studying the cumulative effects of transfigurational instabilities in a rare subgenus of dwarf arctic kelpie.' 'Ah. So, nice day for Quidditch then, innit?'"
He shook his head. "That Tonks bird'd be more my speed. Pity she's spoken for."
Smirking, Crowley said, "I still won it, though, didn't I? And you didn't have to carry me far... Not like the time when your Slytherin pal suggested that antagonizing an archangel might not be the most prudent thing to do. Three flights of stairs if you'll recall. Or, probably you won't..."
He looked smug. "Nothing wrong with a good, healthy dose of vanity. And you can hardly compare most in the house with the few... unfortunates. Every house has those."
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2006-03-21 07:32 am (UTC)"John. They really will let anyone in, won't they? What the fuck are you doing here? Come to terrify my students for the amusement factor? Or just continuing your fine tradition in messing around in other people's business?"
no subject
Date: 2006-03-21 08:04 am (UTC)"Who'da thought, you going all repectable and shit...so what're you working on? Geraniums? Christ, I'm flashing back to the sodding Bog God here. Couldn't you at least teach the poor blighters something useful?"
no subject
Date: 2006-03-21 06:57 pm (UTC)Crowley smirked. "I am teaching them something useful. How not to piss me off mostly. But we've covered poisonous plants and some of the more... interesting magical varieties. Didn't think it'd be a bright idea to send the kids back to their dorms with Devil's Snare, though, no matter how much I might want to."
no subject
Date: 2006-03-21 09:26 pm (UTC)At Kira's greeting, he turned and firmly shook the proferred hand. "Pleasure to meet you, Lunanatkira. Name's John Constantine. Yeah, me and Crowley go way back. Though I'm not sure 'friends' is exactly the right word--'fellow bastards who haven't quite got around to killing each other yet' might be nearer the mark." He chuckled.
no subject
Date: 2006-03-21 10:20 pm (UTC)Crowley rolled his eyes at the interaction between John and Kira and gave the man a significant glance. If he found out that the kid was supposedly a reincarnation of Lucifer and Crowley hadn't told him yet, there would be hell to pay.
"Yeah, that no killing rule is a bugger."
no subject
Date: 2006-03-21 11:51 pm (UTC)"So Kira, what's your House?" he asked casually. It was still a bit of an embarrassment to have landed in Hufflepuff, and he hoped to Hell Crowley didn't ask him about it (no need to ask which House he'd got Sorted into. Parseltongue being his native language and all.) But he wasn't noble enough for Gryffindor, political enough for Slytherin or bookish enough for Ravenclaw, so there it was. It wasn't all bad, he supposed. Being characterized as excessively loyal made for a nice change of pace.
no subject
Date: 2006-03-22 12:11 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-22 12:22 am (UTC)Don't say it, wanker, don't you dare say a fucking word, he thought ferociously, not looking in Crowley's direction.
no subject
Date: 2006-03-22 04:33 am (UTC)"Hufflepuff," he said mildly, keeping his face expressionless. "I understand that house is known for being fair, just, earnest, hard-working and loyal..."
no subject
Date: 2006-03-22 04:47 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-22 07:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-22 07:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-22 10:53 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-23 12:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-23 12:55 am (UTC)He shook his head. "That Tonks bird'd be more my speed. Pity she's spoken for."
no subject
Date: 2006-03-23 12:57 am (UTC)(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:no subject
Date: 2006-03-22 10:51 pm (UTC)He looked smug. "Nothing wrong with a good, healthy dose of vanity. And you can hardly compare most in the house with the few... unfortunates. Every house has those."