Who the hell do you think I am!? And where the hell IS Yoko Ritona (Gurren Lagaan)?

[surface-sniper.livejournal.com]

There was a clanking sound, and the sound of stone scraping on stone, before a red-head 15 year old dressed only in a scarf, a flame-pattern bikini, shorts, stockings, shoes and, well, air crawled out from behind and under a tapestry into the Sorting Room, surverying the room for threats. She loaded a steel crossbow bolt into a long-barreled high-power rifle, and powered up the electromagnetic coils.

She spoke into a headset mike: "Kamina, this is Yoko. I got separated from you somewhere in the Beastman base. Come in."

She didn't even her static. "Kamina, Simon, come in. This isn't funny, Kamina, stop being a moron and answer me."

She looked at her headset: battery power out. Ah.

"Well, at least it looks safe," she sighed. "'Let's raid the base before blowing it up,' you said. 'Beastmen got all sorts of tasty food,' you said. Kamina, you idiot..."

She walked up to the questionnaire and, for lack of anything better to do, filled it out.

( Allow me to elucidate. )

"I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG.
(Drawing of a bullet)
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. (Drawing of a bullet).
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. (Drawing of a bullet).
One day, marmalade will rule the world. (Drawing of a bullet)"

Popcorn is delicious, being popcorned, not so much

[weaponized-love.livejournal.com]

Right. Due to suddenly being the head writer of a Bliss Stage related project, including writing for a Keenan, unless someone wants everyone's favorite Pirate Who Hits On Anything Keenan, he's going to be popcorned.

Sorry about the mess, ladies and gentlemen.

application for Duncan Shriek, from Jeff VanderMeer's novels of Ambergris.

[duncan-shriek.livejournal.com]

In the Sorting Room, a rug lay upon the floor, and under the rug, something began to thump and shift.

Abruptly, the rug lifted, in a cloud of dust and the creaking of ungreased hinges. From the trapdoor beneath, a dusty man in a dirt-spattered trench coat clambered into the room.

His blink was far from myopic, though his eyes were red-rimmed from irritation and lack of sleep. He glanced sharply around. He muttered something that sounded like fanaarcensitii.

When he saw the application, he began to laugh, a helpless clotted choking laughter that faded only as he noticed the moving quill had tried to write down his first word. Fanaarcensitii. Then he was silent, and took the quill in hand himself.

State your full name.

He wrote: Duncan Shriek. And he crossed out what the quill had written before that.

( 'Of course I can find you a job. There are lots of available positions for a paranoid, discredited, fringe historian with a fungal disorder who has recently been laid off for laying his students.' -- Janice Shriek, to her brother )

((I have read the [info]hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. Shriek.
I have read the [info]hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. Shriek.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch.Shriek.
One day, marmalade will rule the world.Shriek.))