[Open RP] The first episode is always the most boring...

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

So Kaga had been eating dinner and wondering when Hogwarts had TVs in the Great Hall, or whether they would even work.

Then the first episode of Hat Shore began.

Kaga had wrinkled his nose at the idea. He doesn't watch much TV (there were better things to do) but he was aware of the concept of reality tv and found it distasteful. Sure, by technicality Iron Chef and its international spinoffs were reality shows too, but at least he and his nephew made them classy, damnit!

He nearly spat out his food when he saw Yukimura, then Kuronue on screen. As Ariane appeared and explained things to them, he realized that this was another experiment of the Sorting Hat's (yes, he's heard of the village of tents and mass weddings).

He continued to watch in horrified, fascinated pity as the episode played out.

[[Kaga needs someone to be horrified with. :P]]

Comments

[nerdofthelord.livejournal.com]

Cas had been looking for Dean (for no particular reason, he was a bit bored) and followed the sound of the man's voice into the Great Hall, slightly confused until he caught sight of the television screens and realized his friend was being broadcast from some point unknown.

His first thought was that the Hat had brought Gabriel back from the dead and he was up to his old tricks (http://www.buddytv.com/articles/supernatural/supernatural-recap-trapped-in-32420.aspx), but Gabriel rarely pulled the same prank twice, they tended much more toward the sadistic-if-not-lethal than this appeared to be, and he almost certainly would have swept all of them up in whatever scheme he was hatching, not just Dean. (Also, some of the decor was a little over-the-top even for the Trickster.)

He stood there, looking perplexed and watching the...plot, such as it was...unfold for some time before an adequate response came to him.

"This is not going to end well."

[hunter-returns.livejournal.com]

Cas hadn't been the only one out in search of Dean. Sam had lost track of both of his brothers, and whenever Dean was quiet for this long, it normally meant he was up to something. So he was out to try and stop Dean from whatever mischief he was cooking up.

The hunter nearly collided with Castiel in the Hall. "Hey Cas, have you.." His gaze fell to the big screen TV's that were all over the Hall and he stared in shock.

"Oh God. Dean?"

[nerdofthelord.livejournal.com]

"Somehow I don't think God is responsible." The angel was watching events unfold with what could only be called morbid fascination. "He doesn't appear to be in any immediate danger, and I haven't heard him call for help. ...what is that thing, and why did that woman just drop a taco on its head?"

[hunter-returns.livejournal.com]

"Did Gabriel show up and no one told us? What the hell?"

Sam snorted, "It looks like walking hamburger. And.. it talks? What the hell's up with that orange cat?" He took Cas' elbow and guided the angel out of the line of immediate traffic. They took a seat at a nearby table and he asked a house elf for a steady supply of beer. Sam had a feeling they were going to need it.

[nerdofthelord.livejournal.com]

"The large warrior seems almost as excitable as your brother. ...Interesting. I don't think I'm familiar with any lore concerning a talking ectoplasmic chihuahua."

[hunter-returns.livejournal.com]

"And just about as thickheaded. The sparkly underwear's an.. interesting addition. Wait. Wha.. did that blonde just shove her hands through that guy's head?"

And Sam is now completely sucked into the show for the pure WTF-ery.

[nerdofthelord.livejournal.com]

"But louder. Slightly. ...Oh, Adam's there as well. He seems unperturbed." Nevertheless, Cas frowned slightly, cracking a beer. "I wonder why they were singled out." He blinked once, distracted again almost immediately. "That beef creature, what is it doing to its companion? Is that a...[[bedazzled]] butterfly?"

[hunter-returns.livejournal.com]

Sam shook his head as Dean railed against potential rapists on the school grounds. "He's gonna blow a damn gasket."

He drained his beer. "As soon as he gets out of there, I think we should consider investing heavily in tranquilizer guns. Anything to keep him settled the hell down."

[nerdofthelord.livejournal.com]

Castiel was genuinely concerned by that little display. "He isn't seriously worried that we're going to be raped?" He shook his head. "We should get an acromantula hunt put together, soon. He desperately needs to burn off some excess energy.

"And I concur. I'm more than happy to help when there's a real problem, but I can't come running every ten minutes because his mouth has once again gotten the better of his brain."

[hunter-returns.livejournal.com]

Sam pinched the bridge of his nose, shaking his head in brotherly exasperation, a gesture Castiel had no doubt seen in action dozens of times. "I get that Dean cares, and he worries when he's not around us, but seriously? Yeah, I'll talk to Dad about that hunt. The sooner the better."

"Cas.. have you ever considered ignoring him? Seriously, it's worked for me over the years. I can't jump every time he bellows. I figured that out when I was six. Trust me, even if he does wind up in trouble, you know Dean. He always finds a way out of it and there's a no-kill spell, so it's not like it's going to be a matter of life and death around here."

[nerdofthelord.livejournal.com]

The angel nodded glumly. He'd told Dean once that he couldn't spend all his time following him around, but somewhere along the way it seemed that was exactly what he'd begun to do. Semper fidelis--was he so desperate to live up to that motto that he'd taken it too far? Or was the instinct to jump when whoever he followed said 'jump' just so ingrained he'd never be able to shake it?

"It may come to that. But I'll give him fair warning first." He downed half his beer in one pull. "The no-kill rule doesn't mean people can't be harmed nearly to the death, you know. I'm sure it's probably happened before." He'd never forgive himself if that happened to Dean because he chose the wrong summons to brush off.

[hunter-returns.livejournal.com]

"Don't worry, Cas," Sam assured him. "Look, it's Dean. Once he gets that we're all here and safe, he'll find a pretty girl, or two, get laid and he'll be back to his usual self. He won't be so high strung."

"We're all around to keep an eye on him Cas. We won't let him do anything too terribly stupid and get himself nearly killed."

"Wait. So the blonde shoves her hands in the guy's head now they're chatting like it's no big deal?"

[nerdofthelord.livejournal.com]

Sam was right; maybe the problem would resolve itself, and if it didn't, he'd have a word with Dean about crying wolf. Sometimes the man had been known to listen.

"I don't think I understand television," Cas decided, trying to discern whether there was any sort of rhyme or reason to what was going on. "Now the ghostly chihuahua was teaching the barbarian warrior to make tacos, and the cheese visited a holy proclamation upon the brain-eating blonde and the hamburger beast...when did the sparkling man come in?"

[hunter-returns.livejournal.com]

"I'll see if Dad can talk to him. He's probably the only person Dean has ever listened to without question."

He shrugged and flagged down a house elf for some lunch. "Beats me, man. This is probably something the Hat cooked up, so I couldn't even begin to guess. Oh him? That's George, believe it or not, he's a local vampire. Yeah, I know. He doesn't look like one we've seen before and I don't get the sparkles one bit. He nearly mowed me down in a magical sleigh before you and Dean showed up."

[nerdofthelord.livejournal.com]

Cas nodded solemnly, absorbing that information. "Does he feed on blood like the vampires we know? I'm not sure it's terribly safe putting some of these people together.

"The ironic thing," he added after a moment, "is that if Dean weren't a participant in this show, watching it would probably keep him harmlessly occupied for some time."

[hunter-returns.livejournal.com]

"Honestly, I don't think he'd know what to do with a person if he managed to catch one. He eats animals rather than people."

Sam thought for a moment, "We probably can't get a television installed in our room, but I bet there might be enough on the laptop to keep him amused for awhile." He really didn't want to spend hours listening to Dean watch reruns of Dr Sexy, but if it kept him out of trouble, he'd adjust.

[nerdofthelord.livejournal.com]

This sounded like a very peculiar sort of vampire to Cas, but it was hardly the oddest thing he'd run into in this place.

"That would be a good idea." He glanced back up at the screen, and his eyes widened. "Uh. Sam...?" The door to Room #5 was visible in the background. It was covered in dark magical sigils and runes. Glittery, rhinestone-studded scribings of darkest eldritch sorcery. And also disturbingly mutilated paper dolls.

[hunter-returns.livejournal.com]

Sam didn't mention that he ferverently hoped that Dean's extensive..'exotic' movie collection hadn't somehow managed to survive on the memory given form that was his laptop. He really, really hoped.

His eyes followed the angel's and he frowned. "What the.. son of a bitch. Do they have any idea what they're doing there?"

[nerdofthelord.livejournal.com]

"My guess would be no." Cas frowned as well; the scene changed before he could properly interpret all the symbols, and some he didn't recognize. "From what I could make out, they're risking anything from a spontaneous explosion of Hellfire to the summoning of a major extraplanar power every time the door is opened or shut. This isn't good."

[hunter-returns.livejournal.com]

"Damnit, they're not equipped to deal with something like that. Half of those people don't look like they'd be able to handle themselves in any kind of fight. Dean can't do it alone if something goes sideways in there."

Sam looked around, worried. How were they supposed to warn the people in the house that something was about to go terribly wrong?

[nerdofthelord.livejournal.com]

"Maybe we could track down the woman who explained the premise to everyone. Do you know her?" Cas asked.

[hunter-returns.livejournal.com]

"Not offhand," he said.

As they sat and contemplated just how to get a warning to Dean, a house elf flapped over to the table and deposited haphazard stack of fliers (http://community.livejournal.com/hogwarts_hocus/1998078.html) in the middle of the table before wandering off to continue it's duties of posting them on all visible surfaces. "Hn. Well that'll take care of that. We can shoot her an owl and let her know about the runes."

[nerdofthelord.livejournal.com]

Cas nodded. "I wonder how long they intend to keep everyone in there. I'm concerned Dean won't handle a lengthy confinement very well." He hadn't handled a very short confinement well, so far.

[hunter-returns.livejournal.com]

Sam hadn't thought of that yet and his frown deepened. "I hope not for long. With any luck, the Hat will have a short attention span and we'll be able to get them back quickly."

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

Kaga was now looking a bit bored as he watched. (Hey, he didn't know Dean and he didn't like Turlough.)

"No, if hearsay is to be believed, it will end when the Sorting Hat gets bored with it."