Application for Yin from Darker than Black

[goshikkurorita.livejournal.com]

The sun stretched her shadow over the hard wood desk. Her eyes never left the application that rested on said desk, unblinking, whilst her hands rested by her sides. The dictaquill had stood to attention five minutes ago, and still awaited use by the newcomer. She had read over the questions multiple times, to the point where they soon lost meaning. Her eyes traveled lazily to the quill, no visual response broke the mundane expression on her face, such lack of emotion reminiscent of a dolls painted face. She reached out and plucked the writing implement from its ink well, and hovered it over the application. Excess ink fell from the quills tip and splotched the piece of paper, thankfully tarnishing the pages margin, rather than obscuring the questions further from their already beclouded phrasing. As she began answering, for lack of a better verb, the application, her body was angled in a most peculiar way: as if to touch the wood, would send her skin to blister.

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry Student Application #1974489 State your full name. Yin. 1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite? I do not often eat cheese. 2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop? I do not have the clearance to kill anyone. 3. What time is it where you are? I do not know. 4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black. I do not understand. That is illegal, is it not? 5. If you are pushing to be in: i.) Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark. The Syndicate. ii.) Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument. I do not have the experience to answer this question. iii.) Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it. As events never cease, neither does their documentation. iv.) Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless. I am a Doll. I have the technique known as Remote Viewing because of what I am. 6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do. I offer this packet of cigarettes.

  

From a disguised pocket in her purple dress, she withdrew a rather browbeaten packet of cigarettes. Yin did not smoke, so what use where they to her? She placed them on the desk, next to the application, then turned her back on it all-together. She stared through the arched windows behind her, taking the time to not understand it, as it was against her programming.

 

"I have read the hogwarts_hocus  faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. Yin.
I have read the hogwarts_hocus  rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. Yin.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. Yin.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. Yin."

Comments

[ilikemyscars.livejournal.com]

"I gather you're locked in here until this application process is completed. That means we students have to vote on which House you should be assigned, based on these interviews, and...ahh...a final decision will be made." No need to get into the Hat business at this point. Claire couldn't even begin to explain the Hat, and frankly preferred not to think about It if she could help it.

"Once that's done, it seems you're free to stay or go as you wish. The Houses are associated with character traits: bravery, intellect, usefulness, loyalty...I'm not sure what Slytherin is exactly; bartending in the dark isn't much of a clue. Do any of those seem more or less apt for you, in your opinion?"