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hh_mirrorHe knew he had to open his eyes, and he didn't want to.
Wasn't the point of dying that you got to close your eyes for good? "I'll sleep when I'm dead" and all that? Except that he'd been dead twice now, and it wasn't turning out to be the restful experience he'd thought it would be. The last time he'd woken up from eternal slumber had been a nightmare.
He could tell that he was on something cold and hard. Reluctantly, he opened his eyes and was surprised to be in a large, open room. He sat up carefully and examined himself. The flesh of his left hand was still gone, burned down to the metal endoskeleton. So this probably wasn't Heaven, or the afterlife, or whatever murderers turned heroes got when they left the mortal plane.
Wherever it was, this place was much more intact than where he'd been the last time he'd closed his eyes. There were no signs of destruction, or that the stone walls had been rebuilt from ruins. Was this a stronghold? A place the machines missed? Maybe it was uninhabited. "Hello?" He tried the doors and found them locked. To hell with this, he thought, and tried to force the door open. It wouldn't budge. "Hello? Hey! Anyone out there?" he yelled, hoping to be heard through the tick wood. He pounded some more and yanked on the handle. After he'd twisted the heavy wrought iron into a knot he gave up.
He came back to a table he'd ignored in his haste to get out the door. It was covered in paper, with a quill and a fresh pot of ink. Hello? Hello? Hey! Anyone out there? was written on the paper.
State your full name.
He tried talking to the quill. "Marcus Wright." It wrote his name down for him.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
"I don't know," he said softly, confused by the question and his reaction to it. With everything that been happening, there hadn't been time to think about being hungry, or rather not being hungry. The human condition no longer applies to you, she'd said. Fuck that. He tried to imagine eating a cheeseburger, and how good it would taste. Nothing. He had no desire to eat, not even a slight craving.
"I don't know what cheese I would want anymore."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
"Carrottop." This time with conviction. If Skynet had ever seen an 1-800-COLLECT commercial, who could blame it for taking out humanity?
3. What time is it where you are?
((I left this blank, and it was not intentional. I need to pay more attention.))
"I don't know. Daytime? The sun's out." It was, and it looked like a decent day through the window. Cold, maybe, but the haze he'd seen around the destroyed cities was gone. So either he was in the middle of nowhere, or something wasn't right.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
"If I don't know shit about who these people are, can I still offer an opinion? I'm not dead. Again. Yet. Or however the hell this works. But I'm guessing that this Albus is too worried about why he's not dead anymore to really care about getting laid."
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
"Fucking Dark, I guess." Marcus shrugged, rubbed his good hand over the back of his head as he thought about it. "'Cause you'd say 'It's fucking dark in here,' and yeah, it is."
B. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
What? Now he was really confused, and getting a bit angry. "Is there a point to these questions? Harry should get married to Fred because he needs to get laid, because I guess the Albus guy isn't. So George can run off with Sirius, and they can all be happy in whatever the hell place this is with questions like this."
C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
"Jesus." He just wanted to leave. "I jack cars, get people killed, and fuck over humanity by being a freak of science. I don't do paper."
D. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.
He rolled his eyes. "I'm really good at opening jars," he said snarkily. "It comes with the freak of science part. Also, I can't stay dead. Does that count for something?"
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
Marcus realized that he didn't know what he had on him. "I need to stop stealing clothes from dead people," he said to himself, but the quill wrote it down anyway. He patted down the pockets of his uniform. "I've got, uh, dirt," he said. "I can fix your broken things. I'll open jars, too."
"I have read the [info]hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ___MW_________
I have read the [info]hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. __MW_________.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. __MW_________.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. ___MW__________"
Wasn't the point of dying that you got to close your eyes for good? "I'll sleep when I'm dead" and all that? Except that he'd been dead twice now, and it wasn't turning out to be the restful experience he'd thought it would be. The last time he'd woken up from eternal slumber had been a nightmare.
He could tell that he was on something cold and hard. Reluctantly, he opened his eyes and was surprised to be in a large, open room. He sat up carefully and examined himself. The flesh of his left hand was still gone, burned down to the metal endoskeleton. So this probably wasn't Heaven, or the afterlife, or whatever murderers turned heroes got when they left the mortal plane.
Wherever it was, this place was much more intact than where he'd been the last time he'd closed his eyes. There were no signs of destruction, or that the stone walls had been rebuilt from ruins. Was this a stronghold? A place the machines missed? Maybe it was uninhabited. "Hello?" He tried the doors and found them locked. To hell with this, he thought, and tried to force the door open. It wouldn't budge. "Hello? Hey! Anyone out there?" he yelled, hoping to be heard through the tick wood. He pounded some more and yanked on the handle. After he'd twisted the heavy wrought iron into a knot he gave up.
He came back to a table he'd ignored in his haste to get out the door. It was covered in paper, with a quill and a fresh pot of ink. Hello? Hello? Hey! Anyone out there? was written on the paper.
State your full name.
He tried talking to the quill. "Marcus Wright." It wrote his name down for him.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
"I don't know," he said softly, confused by the question and his reaction to it. With everything that been happening, there hadn't been time to think about being hungry, or rather not being hungry. The human condition no longer applies to you, she'd said. Fuck that. He tried to imagine eating a cheeseburger, and how good it would taste. Nothing. He had no desire to eat, not even a slight craving.
"I don't know what cheese I would want anymore."
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
"Carrottop." This time with conviction. If Skynet had ever seen an 1-800-COLLECT commercial, who could blame it for taking out humanity?
3. What time is it where you are?
((I left this blank, and it was not intentional. I need to pay more attention.))
"I don't know. Daytime? The sun's out." It was, and it looked like a decent day through the window. Cold, maybe, but the haze he'd seen around the destroyed cities was gone. So either he was in the middle of nowhere, or something wasn't right.
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
"If I don't know shit about who these people are, can I still offer an opinion? I'm not dead. Again. Yet. Or however the hell this works. But I'm guessing that this Albus is too worried about why he's not dead anymore to really care about getting laid."
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
"Fucking Dark, I guess." Marcus shrugged, rubbed his good hand over the back of his head as he thought about it. "'Cause you'd say 'It's fucking dark in here,' and yeah, it is."
B. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
What? Now he was really confused, and getting a bit angry. "Is there a point to these questions? Harry should get married to Fred because he needs to get laid, because I guess the Albus guy isn't. So George can run off with Sirius, and they can all be happy in whatever the hell place this is with questions like this."
C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
"Jesus." He just wanted to leave. "I jack cars, get people killed, and fuck over humanity by being a freak of science. I don't do paper."
D. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.
He rolled his eyes. "I'm really good at opening jars," he said snarkily. "It comes with the freak of science part. Also, I can't stay dead. Does that count for something?"
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.
Marcus realized that he didn't know what he had on him. "I need to stop stealing clothes from dead people," he said to himself, but the quill wrote it down anyway. He patted down the pockets of his uniform. "I've got, uh, dirt," he said. "I can fix your broken things. I'll open jars, too."
"I have read the [info]hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. ___MW_________
I have read the [info]hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. __MW_________.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. __MW_________.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. ___MW__________"
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Date: 2010-02-21 06:17 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-21 06:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-22 05:14 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-22 05:25 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-22 05:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-22 05:41 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-22 05:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-22 05:54 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-22 06:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-22 06:07 am (UTC)"And you're a nice Steel human?" Yeah, that's gonna kinda stick.
no subject
Date: 2010-02-22 06:13 am (UTC)He also didn't know how to answer that question. Did a few days of heroic behavior counteract a life of crime?
"I want to be." Which was true. It was a strange and nice feeling, not being criminal scum.
no subject
Date: 2010-02-22 06:19 am (UTC)"I could help," she said. "We could explore and fight mean humans and Pokemon together."
no subject
Date: 2010-02-22 06:53 am (UTC)Vote: Hufflepuff
Date: 2010-02-22 07:05 am (UTC)Re: Vote: Hufflepuff
Date: 2010-02-22 07:11 am (UTC)