::Closed RP - In search of a Room::

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

[[May stray into NSFW territory]]


Not our room.

Near still couldn't believe he'd said that. Was he really thinking that he and Mello might...? What a thought.

But he did need a room. The house elf he'd chased down to fetch cigarettes for Matt had told him that he only needed to claim one that appealed to him, and there were certainly plenty in the same corridor.

He began peeking into unoccupied rooms.

Comments

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

I watch Near pad down the hallway, looking into rooms. He looks...different...in my shirt. Through habit, my hands seek out chocolate, but I still don't have any. I sigh. From what I heard in the sorting room, I don't want to ask one of those creatures, the house elf, for any. Deciding the fastest way to get any would be to follow Near, though I don't exactly know why, I start down the hall after him.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

Used to being alert, Near heard footsteps behind him, and he whirled to face them.

Only Mello.

'Only' Mello.

"Hey." Near smiled faintly, acutely self-conscious. "I figured it'd be a good idea to have somewhere other than the detention room to sleep. Are you looking for a room too?"

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

I shrug. "I need chocolate. I figure the fastest way to find chocolate is to find a room. Matt's stuff showed up in his room, so it follows." I try not to think about 'sleeping' in the detention room. It's too tempting.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

"That certainly fits the reasoning of this place," he said agreeably, opening the door to a room decorated, as so many of the ones in Ravenclaw were, in blue. It was small but well-appointed, with a cozy-looking windowseat.

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

"Not a lot of difference between them, is there?" I ask. I really don't care where I sleep as long as it has my chocolate when we find it. And is near Matt.

Why am I just assuming we'll be in the same room?

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

"Some are larger than others, or have more windows. I like the windowseat. And some of them have pretty small beds, but..." Self-conciously, he averted his eyes from the large four-poster bed that took up a large portion of the room.

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

I glance over at what he turned away from. A four poster bed? That could be fun. I wonder how he would take restraints?

Why the fuck was I thinking like that?

And why was I still assuming we'd share a room?

"But?" I asked.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

"But this one doesn't." Near forced himself to stand up straight, to look at Mello directly. "I think w - I - whatever - a big bed is a good idea, under the circumstances."

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

God, I need chocolate. "Under the circumstances?" I repeat. He's starting to blush again. Interesting. Is he just assuming...?

Would he do that?

Would he want to?

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

"Under the circumstances, given that any bed I sleep in is likely to have you and I in it not sleeping relatively often. If I just had myself to consider, a single would be fine, but it'd probably be a bit cramped for sex." Not that I've actually had sex on a bed yet. It was awkward to talk about, but easier as he forced it out. "Unless you... unless you want to have a room with a big bed, and I just..." He found himself looking down at the thought, biting his lip.

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

Well, that's a lot more direct an answer than I expected. "A single would be fine for sex, but it wouldn't be comfortable for sleeping," I say, trying to be nonchalant and not show how much he surprised me. "And you just...what? Sleep standing in the corner?" I put my hands on my hips, waiting for an answer.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

"So... are we sharing a room, then?" Raising his head, he met Mello's gaze. "I wasn't sure if you'd want to."

Until I thought about us not sharing one, I didn't realize how much I wanted to.

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

Non-plussed, I fight the desire to stammer. I manage to shrug. "If you're wanting to have sex on anything resembling a regular basis or ..." What else is there? I shrug again. "It's up to you." That has got to be one of the stupidest things I've ever said.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

"I'd like to," Near found himself responding before even thinking about it. "The sex, and the room."

And maybe the 'or'...

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

There is no way I'm up for more arguing, discussing or anything at the moment. "Then, find us a room," I grumble. I want my chocolate. Why is it my pocket didn't empty in the sorting room but it does here? That is puzzling and obnoxious.

And, what more was there...could there be between us?

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

"I kind of like this one, unless you think it's too small." He crossed the floor to the windowseat, climbing up onto it. "There's a lake outside. I can see it from here. We never really had views at... before, did we?" Near was still trying not to let himself block out what Mello had revealed about their childhood home, but he wasn't sure he wanted to talk about it. "And it'd be a good place to read."

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

I cross the room, standing next to him, and look out the window. It's interesting that he didn't say 'Whammy's.' Does that mean...? Well, I knew he'd been sheltered, working with the FBI and everything while I was in Chicago. Before I realize what I'm doing, my hand is on his shoulder. "It is a nice view." I feel a little awkward, but it's too late for me to move away. "What do you like to read now?" I ask, forcing myself to be casual.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

"Reference, mostly." Near couldn't help leaning into the touch, or tipping his head so his cheek brushed Mello's arm. "Recently, some medical journals. Articles on emergent diseases. It's always good to be aware of pathogens." A slight chuckle. "I never did like germs."

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

His almost cat-like behavior is interesting. I try to ignore how it makes me feel. Him being all cuddly should not make me feel warm. It shouldn't...but it does. I lift a finger and brush his cheek. "You were always more into the medical than I was. I preferred, and still do, history and psychology."

Which means, I do know what's going on, even if I'm trying to deny it in my head, in my actions.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

Near's breath hitched a little at the light touch. Such a small thing, to provoke such a reaction. Still, he tried to continue. "Psychology... Not one of my better subjects." Although that, of course, was relative. "It's entirely made up of grey areas. I see enough of that in life. If I'm going to study for my own enjoyment I'd prefer at least some certainty."

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

Oddly, I want to keep seeing what kind of reactions I can get out of him. We haven't really been 'gentle,' per say. I wonder how he'd react. "Like diseases no one is sure about is all black at white," I challenge while my hand slowly slides along his shoulder to his neck. "So, do you like this room?"

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

Cat-like indeed, Near moves with the touch, pressing against Mello's hand with a quiet sigh. "Not black and white, but a puzzle that can be solved, or at least the shape of it can be found. The human mind, that will always be a tangle." He didn't, for instance, try to analyze why these light touches were making him so painfully aware of his skin, of the warmth of Mello's skin. "And it's a nice room. Snug. Rooms that are too large make me feel exposed."

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

I let my fingers wander up into his hair, teasing the nape of his neck. "The human mind is simple, Near. Stimulus, reaction, reward. It's just a matter of finding the right stimulus." I think, if he could, he would purr. I smile. "Even for the craziest, behavior can be predicted, once you know what drives the other person."

And, what drives you, my rival? Why do you trust me? Why do I want you?

Does it really matter?

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

There's nothing abstract about Mello's words now, and Near knows it. It doesn't stop him from arching his head back, against his fingers.

"And is that what you're doing now? Testing stimuli to determine my reaction?"

Drives... Mello had always been so driven. It must be exhausting.

"Do I get a reward, or am I meant to be rewarding you?"

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

I shrug, my fingers still playing with his hair. "That depends." I lean over, looking into his blue eyes, already showing signs of arousal. "What is your reward? What is it you want?" I bring up my other hand to caress his cheek. "Tell me Near, are we just rivals?" Please, say no.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

"Mello..." Taking a deep breath, Near raised a hand to very lightly stroke Mello's hair. "I don't know if you can believe this, but I've never hated you. And I never wanted you to die. It saddened me when you died, it angered me. Because you've always been so alive. Full of anger and frustrating as hell, but so very alive." He took a deep breath, intent on not stumbling over his words. "Memory can be a funny thing. It's easy to soften the memory of someone who's died, to smooth the rough edges. I'd forgotten, until you showed up here, just how prickly you really were... are. It was unfair to you for me to have forgotten."

Steeling himself, he continued to stroke Mello's hair. "It's been a long time since I thought of you as a rival. And I don't think that's at all the right word for what we are now." If only I knew what the right word was.

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

I feel my mouth quirk upwards. His touch is gentle, hesitant. I move a little so I can sit with him on the window seat. "It's nice to know I was missed." I lean forward and brush my lips against his. If we talk anymore, I know where this will lead, our conversation. I'm not ready to deal with it. Not without more chocolate, more time. I wonder if we can even really be gentle with each other, or is it only roughness and pain that will work for us. He likes to cuddle, but will he want to make...

I can't finish the thought. It's too close to the surface, too close to the truth I'm not ready to face.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

"Mmmm..." Near leaned into the kiss, resting one hand on Mello's shoulder. It was easy, so strangely easy, to go further; half-crawling into Mello's lap, Near deepened the kiss, equally eager to distract himself from a line of thought that seemed too much to continue right now.

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

I move to kiss his neck, leaving a trail of kisses across his cheek. "Tell me, Near," I start, knowing my question will be mean. "Do you want me, or do you just want how I make you feel? Is the only thing you're after to forget who you're supposed to be?" I don't stop kissing his neck, though. I'm not sure I really care about the answer. I know why I'm doing this, even if I don't want to admit it. I wrap and arm low around his waist to keep him from pulling away from me completely.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

He had think about that, think about how to word it... Mello was so prickly, and if he wasn't careful it could get ugly. Or at a bare minimum, Mello would stop kissing him, stop holding him.

"It's only because it's you, because I want you, that you make me feel this way. How could I forget what I'm supposed to be without someone who knows who I am... probably the only person who knows who I am."

But it was getting hard to speak. Each kiss provoked a small gasp.

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

Strangely, his answer completely satisfied me. I knew he had to work hard to get it out, fighting the feelings I was bringing out in his body.

I go back to kissing his mouth, slowly licking his lips and then entering his mouth with my tongue. Stimulus, reaction, reward. Very simple, very effective.

I pull back just as slowly from our kiss, waiting for him to open his eyes again before I whisper, "I'm out of lube, so no penetration, but anything else, we can do, if you want."

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

"Oh." Well, that was certainly direct, and Near appreciated it; most people would have been coy in their phrasing, embroidered it in frustrating euphemism. "I want, want to do..." He looked at Mello searchingly, trying to be equally candid. "Want to do something. I don't know what. But I want, I'd like, to be able to watch your face when you come."

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

I raise an eyebrow at him. I expected blunt. I didn't expect this answer though. "If you can keep your eyes open, then fine. Get up. We're moving to the bed."

I could almost admit to myself what we were doing.

I catch his hand before he can move fully away from me. "But, first, you're helping me out of my clothes." Just because I could almost admit what we were doing didn't mean I wasn't going to take advantage of him being submissive. I liked subs. They were more fun to be with.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

Undressing Mello hardly seemed an unpleasant task. Nimbly, he worked open the vest Mello habitually wore, started on the lacings of his tight leather pants.

"All this... it makes it like unwrapping you. Setting you free." He stroked every inch of skin as he bared it, bending to kiss Mello's collarbone, his stomach, the curve of his hip.

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

Setting me free? I sigh softly under his touches. There is hunger, need, want in each caress, each kiss. After he pulls off my boots, I pull him close and kiss him again, my hands sliding under my shirt. It looks good on him. It'll look better off.

I undress him, revealing his body, his arousal, his want for me.

How long has it been since someone wanted just me? Not what I could do for them, not what they thought I was, but me.

I suppose I felt the same way he did.

It was time to stop thinking. I pulled him close to me, our bodies meeting, the heat of them pouring over me in almost suffocating waves as I continued to kiss him.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

Each kiss made Near moan, and he ran his hands up and down Mello's sides, his back, darting caresses to learn the curves and planes of his body, to memorize his form.

"Bed... on the... we should be on the bed..." He nudged Mello towards it, stumbling eagerly on the thick carpet. This was new, this was strange, these light touches and dizzying kisses and nothing else, but it was still Mello, Mello, and that was enough to make his head spin as he pulled them down onto the soft mound of blankets.

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

I thought about slowing him down, telling him to just enjoy. But, there is something about his hunger, his need that fueled my own. I cover his body with mine, kissing him again as my hips begin to slowly rock against him.

I briefly wonder how many clandestine rendezvous this bed had seen, how many young couples had soiled its sheets with their urgency, their need.

I slide a hand down Near's body and lift one of his legs over my hip while I keep rocking against him.

I break our kiss enough to whisper, "You have to keep your eyes open, Near."

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

"Ohh... ahh!" It felt so easy, so simple, to lie under Mello like this, to surge up against him, to move with him at a pace that quickened with their breathing.

But yes, he had said, and yes he did, so very much did want to watch Mello's face, to see what orgasm did to his features, and his eyes widened.

"This, so, it's so good... I never thought about it, never realized what would feel so good..."

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

I'm too close to answer him. I know, I understand what is going on and I still don't want to tell him because that would mean admitting it. I wasn't ready for that.

Sex, I could handle.

Emotion, not yet.

I groan deep in my chest as the pressure to come fills me. And, everything shatters, everything is rebuilt as my body spills onto his. I moan his name, not for trying, not for anything other than it came out of my mouth. My body shudders and I hold myself up over him until I feel him reach his completion before I collapse onto him.

It's almost too much.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

Oh god, he's beautiful.

Oh god, this is beautiful.

Near's unrestrained cries were still echoing off the walls when he relaxed on the bed, sticky and sated.

And Mello, Mello, he folded his arms around Mello, syncing their breathing unconciously.

He cried out my name.

Did that mean something? It felt important somehow. This had been different, so much gentler than their previous encounters despite the simmering urgency that had fueled it. His fingertips traced little circles on Mello's shoulder as the world refocused around him.

"I think," he murmured, "that that makes this very much our room."

[hcolleen.livejournal.com]

It feels good to be pampered, to be petted. It makes me feel wanted, appreciated. I sigh, moving a hand so I can toy with his hair. "This is our room," I sigh.

I hear a faint crack, not quite as loud as the house elf's disappearing/reappearing noise. I wonder if our things are now in the room, under the bed, but I'm too content to move.

[cardarchitect.livejournal.com]

It was unsettlingly comfortable, Near thought, lying with the soothing weight of Mello in his arms, feeling his hand in his hair.

Our room. God, why is this feeling so easy, so...

Right? Is that the word?

Hearing the soft sound, Near felt a sense of relief. Not only would Mello be much happier with his chocolate, he needed his own spare contact lenses.