[identity profile] karrinmurphy.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] hh_mirror


The last thing Murphy remembered was trying, for what felt like the thousandth time, to get ahold of Dresden. She had a case that was...well, it was going badly. Very badly. And this was a hell of a time for Dresden to go missing. Murphy hated to admit it, but she was in way over her head.

Actually, since Harry'd been missing for months, she probably shouldn't be as irritated as she was. He'd just taken off with no note, no contact, and indication he was going to return. Just swell. So the director of S.I. was left without a professional wizard in a town that seemed to attract the creepy crawlies. Not that she couldn't hold her own. But now she was seriously missing him - in a strictly professional capacity - and Murphy was pissed to no end that he was unreachable.

One second she was standing at yet another crime scene, her cell pressed to her ear, legs braced apart, eyes furrowed, listening to the freaking recording - again - and the next she was standing in a stone room surrounded by popcorn kernels. Huh.

The cop in Karrin didn't hesitate a beat. Her gun was out, cell phone away, and she was sweeping the room in one smooth motion. As she walked from the doorway out into the hall, her brow furrowed. This...could not be what she was thinking it was. It was impossible.

But after she'd passed her fourth suit of armor, Murphy had the sinking sensation that this was not the result of a knock upside the head. Slowly lowering her gun, she gaped for a moment at one of the portraits - which freaking moved - and the torches providing illumination. She had just somehow transported from Chicago to a castle.

She had been trying to reach Dresden. Now she was in a fairy tale castle, just missing a bullfrog and a head of hair from here to China. Not hard to figure out how to blame.

"Dresden! she shouted, eyes narrowing. "You half-witted wizard, you come and fix this right now or I will make you pay!"

Date: 2007-08-20 07:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
Periodically, I wandered by the popcorn room. Hey, it didn't hurt anyone, did it? If I wanted to look at the plaque with Murphy and Thomas's names on it and depress myself, it was my God-given right to do so.

It was a damn good thing I'd gone by it today, though. Even before I turned the corner I recognized Murphy's voice--Murphy's cranky voice, but her voice nonetheless. I didn't care if she remembered a thing or not--I didn't care if she kicked my ass or not--I had to tear around the corner, grab her, and hug her for all she was worth. I'm not a demonstrative kind of guy, but in this case there seriously was no other option. Murphy had to be hugged, dammit, no matter what.

"Make me pay for what?" I asked, when I put her down. "I really hope it wasn't my fault you popcorned."

Date: 2007-08-20 08:15 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
Crap. I'd been afraid of that--I knew people coming back from having been popcorn could have all kinds of memory loss. It seemed that Murphy didn't remember a thing about Hogwarts, and I had a feeling it was going to be like her Sorting all over again.

"I've been here," I said. "You've been here, too, but you turned into popcorn--don't ask yet, it's a long story. People who turn into popcorn can come back with amnesia, which you...obviously have. But you're here now. Again. Even if you don't remember anything."

Yeah, I was babbling. Sue me. It was Murphy, here, alive, and human. I was entitled to babble a little.

Date: 2007-08-20 08:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
I somehow resisted the urge to make a face at her. "Have not," I said. "Look, it's not a dream, and I can prove it. You really have been here before--now that you're back, all your stuff should have come back with you. I can show you."

I winced a little--of course she would have thought I'd just up and abandoned her, wouldn't she, if she had no memory? Damn, damn damn. "You and I showed up here not very far apart," I said. "I came on purpose, and you kind of got sucked in here, and we've both been here for months. You popcorned a few weeks ago." I didn't tell her just how emo I'd gone over it, either--if she really didn't remember anything that had happened here, now was not the time to tell her about that aspect of things. So far as she was concerned, we were back to square one.

Date: 2007-08-21 02:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
God, I felt like a shit. So far as I knew, nothing could be done to reverse popcorn-amnesia--I had no way of making her believe me. I had let her know I was leaving, but whatever had happened to her memory had apparently erased that, too. Damn.

"Murph, trust me," I said. "I know you don't remember, but you came here not that long after I did. We both really have been here for months--you and Thomas both turned into popcorn not long ago. He's still popcorn, and he might wake up with memory loss just as bad as yours, whenever he comes back. I can show you your room, and all the stuff you brought with you." Even if nothing managed to jog her memory, maybe all her stuff would at least make the whole place seem a little less alien.

Date: 2007-08-23 01:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
I did understand, in a way, what this was doing to her. I'd seen her before, when she'd undergone spiritual mauling, and while this wasn't anything nasty, it had to have the same lingering flavor. I wasn't sure what else to do, though--part of me was so stupidly giddy just to have her back that I couldn't think of anything else.

I wasn't stupid enough to misread her reaction. She was Murphy the Cop, and I had to deal with her like Murphy the Cop. "Come on," I said, beckoning her after me. "We're in the same House--they're dormitories, basically." My words were as businesslike as I could make them--letting her do her thing was probably the best and only thing I could do for her just now.

Date: 2007-08-23 02:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
Part of me had been expecting something like that, but that didn't make it suck any less. At least this time she hadn't chipped my tooth.

"Wal-Mart," I managed--as well as I could, anyway; it was kind of hard to talk with my face mashed against the wall. "Trolls, chlorofiends, mind-control gas. Can I peel myself off the wall now?"

Date: 2007-08-23 03:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
Okay, I should have expected that...damn that woman has a strong right hook. "No bunk beds," I said, wincing and rubbing my jaw. "I think you knocked one of my teeth loose. No, there's no bunk beds, and I've never heard of any pillow fights." I paused. "Mud wrestling, yes. Pillow fights, no."

Date: 2007-08-26 07:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
I chose not to point out the fact that she had nowhere to take me, if she decided I needed interrogation. That would probably only get me kicked.

"All right, come on," I said, leading her down the hallway. "You've got your own dorm room--some people share, but not everyone." She'd had girly nightgowns, too, but I wasn't going to mention that, either. I liked my kneecaps where they were.

Date: 2007-08-26 07:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
"Well, you did let me in," I said, watching her reaction to the painting. "You didn't keep it like Fort Knox or anything." I'd been in there, as had Lily, and Thomas--some of us not in our own bodies--and my room had been Grand Central Station a few times.

I didn't know the password to the Gryffindor common room, but that was all right, since hardly anyone ever thought of shutting the painting-door anyway. "In here," I said, leading her into the more-or-less deserted common room.

Date: 2007-08-26 08:24 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
"It never actually gets very cold in here," I said. "Magic, probably." As a matter of fact, she had had a down blanket, but I wasn't going to bring that up, especially since the first time I'd seen it I'd swapped bodies with her.

"Right up this way," I said, leading her up the spiral staircase. "Apparently there used to be dormitories, but that seems to have gotten thrown out a while back. Right here."

Here I ran into trouble. I knew what wards Murphy had had on her door before she popcorned, but I wasn't sure if they would have changed while she was gone. I reached out with my staff, tapping at the door, and to my surprise found no wards at all. Huh. That might not be a good sign.

Date: 2007-08-26 07:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
"Different kind of magic, I think," I said. "Besides, this place isn't sub-level." Stone walls or not, the place absorbed more natural heat than my underground apartment. Still didn't explain why it didn't freeze in winter, though.

When she opened the door, I stopped and stared. What the hell? I'd heard that a popcorned person's stuff came back when they unpopped, but it obviously hadn't now. If it wasn't here, just where was it?

"Um," I said. "I'm not really sure how to explain this one. Your stuff should have come back when you did." Yeah, because that didn't sound lame. "We'll have to see if one of the house elves can find it, I guess." Unfortunately, Hogwarts wasn't likely to get any less confusing with further exposure--I'd had a hell of a time when I'd first shown up here, and I'd come to the school on purpose. Had to be ten times weirder to just show up with no warning.

"Yeah, I've got a room," I said. "I just hope all my stuff hasn't mysteriously disappeared since I left it." It was meant to be a joke, but it fell kind of flat.

Date: 2007-08-27 02:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
"If you thought mine was bad...." I trailed off. She'd see for herself, sooner or later. I wasn't sure I wanted to be around when she did, because someone was probably going to get hurt. "And the elves really did do it--wait till you see one. They're like leprechauns on some really hard drugs."

I choked. "Wait, what? Taking over my room?" Thank God I'd had the elves clean it, at least--if she'd seen it while it was still evolving new forms of mildew, I'd never hear the end of it. "Are you really sure you want to do that?"

Date: 2007-08-27 02:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
"Believe it or not, it's not a mess," I said, leading her the rest of the way up the staircase. Why did I think this wasn't going to end well? Probably because Bob was going to have field day. "Right in here."

I unwarded the door and let her in. It was clean, thanks to the elves--all the books were put away, my shelves of ingredients organized, and no visible laundry. The moldy pizza boxes had disappeared, too, thank God.

Date: 2007-08-27 03:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
That had occurred to me before now. "Well, yeah. I know someone you might be able to borrow some from, until you can either find yours or get new ones." Lily wasn't much taller than Murphy, and I was pretty sure she'd be totally willing to loan some out. "Meanwhile, at least my shirts ought to work all right."

I dug through my closet, eventually producing one of the few Star Wars T-shirts that had survived the purge she'd done on my closet when we body-swapped. "Bathroom's that way, if you want a shower," I said, nodding to the far door. She looked tired--no, she looked exhausted. "And unlike my place, they actually have hot water here."

Date: 2007-08-27 04:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
The house elves had come for her clothes while she took a shower--how the hell they knew when to show up, I still didn't know. I had a hard time keeping a straight face when she emerged from the bathroom--the T-shirt, which fit me just find, came down below her knees.

"The house elves do take-out," I said. "Not that you'd stand out here, really--you'd be surprised some of the crap people wear." Well, actually, she probably wouldn't, though it was weirder here even than Chicago.

Date: 2007-08-27 05:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
I burst out laughing. "Never tried either," I said. "You can get a hamburger here, if you ask the right elf. You can get just about anything here, including my kind of coffee." Which was like tar--so thick you could stand the spoon up in it.

Mister, traitor cat, climbed off my lap and ambled over to rub his head against Murphy's knee. "Capes and tutus...aren't far off the mark, actually," I added. "Trust me on this." Granted, most of the really weird stuff was worn by people who weren't actually from Earth, but not all of it.

Date: 2007-08-31 05:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
"Just because you can clean battery cables with it doesn't mean it's a health hazard," I said. "And yeah, seriously an elf. They don't look like what you'd think of as an elf, though--they're maybe two feet high, with bat ears and giant eyeballs."

I wished I'd had a sock, so I could throw it at her. "You will never," I said, "ever, ever, ever see me in a tutu." I might not have much dignity, but I have some, dammit. "As for a burger...well. Summon one of the little bastards--all you usually have to do is say you want one to take your order."

Date: 2007-09-08 03:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
I had to laugh. "Told you," I said, aware I was probably going to get smacked. "House elves. They can get you almost anything, though I wouldn't trust them to do Mexican." I'd learned that the hard way, though I wasn't about to say so to Murphy--the last thing I needed was to give her more ammunition to taunt me. "And no, I'm not wearing a tutu. Ever. I'd draw the line at anything worse than a leotard."

Date: 2007-09-12 05:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
I had to laugh with her. Not because I found the idea of me in a leotard particularly funny, but because she was Murphy, and she was here. It didn't matter that she didn't remember anything of her time before here--she was Murphy, and she was here. Even if nothing ever changed between us, the fact that she was at Hogwarts counted for a hell of a lot.

"I don't know," I said, dead serious. "I don't think I have the legs to pull it off."

Date: 2007-09-13 10:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
"Study, mostly," I said, digging out a bag of M&M's. "This is an entirely different kind of magic--I figured it would be useful, especially against the Red Court." I munched a handful of candy. "You didn't come here on purpose, last time--neither you or Thomas. You thought it was my fault then, too."

Date: 2007-09-15 05:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
Damn ninja skills. As a compromise, I found a dish and poured half the bag into it, setting it on the coffee table. "There. Easy access," I said, going for grumpy and failing.

I couldn't help but grin. "Uh, yeah, actually you can, here. Everyone can, even if they couldn't before--even Marcone." I wasn't sorry to see him popcorned, really.

Date: 2007-09-15 06:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
I choked on an M&M. "Not funny," I said, wheezing, and somehow swallowed the candy. "And don't worry--Marcone's popcorn now. He popped around the same time you and Thomas did, and he's still gone. We'll know if he comes back. Trust me." Marcone wasn't the kind of guy who let his presence go unremarked, unless he really, really wanted to, and then you'd never know he was there until he blindsided you.

"And yeah," I added, trying another M&M and managing to not choke this time. "You can do magic. We all can--your wand probably disappeared with all the rest of your stuff, but we can get you a new one. This isn't the same as my kind of magic--it's part of why I came here."

Date: 2007-09-15 08:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dresdenfile.livejournal.com
I sighed. "Murph, you can't go after Marcone," I said, holding up a hand to stave off her retort for a moment. "A), there's no way to know which kernel is him, and B), what would you do with him if you arrested him? Believe me, he's hardly the worst thing here," I added, thinking of Damien Thorn. "He can't do any real harm here--the school has a spell that won't let anyone die on the grounds." Including things like the yellow-eyed demon...stars and stones, I was going to have to warn Murphy about him, too, whether or not she believed me.

As for the magic...hmm. I stood and got my staff--I'd never yet bought a wand, since wands were sissy things in my opinion--and handed it to her. I then picked up the lamp on my bedside table and dropped it--it shattered like a bomb, bits of glass flying everywhere. "Point the staff at it and say episkey," I said. "It'll put it back together."

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