Office Hours, Astronomy

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

Office Hours
Professor Jadzia Dax, Astronomy
MW 3-6 PM or by Appointment

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Dax hung the sign outside of her office, then rearranged yet another pile of papers, determined to make the space more presentable. It was going about as well as one would expect.

She was wearing her uniform, for the first time in over two months. That morning, rooting through her closet, Dax had come to two realizations: First, that so much time had passed since wearing said uniform, and second, that she hadn’t noticed. No one could blame her, certainly. There were classes to plan, teas to host, and roommates to bother. She was settling into her new role as a professor, and that was perfectly understandable.

And somewhat terrifying. Still, she could mull over all of those things outside of work. She sat down, awaiting any students who  would care to learn.

Comments

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

"Doctor, are you saying you miss me? I knew you'd grown attached." She winked and reached for stack of papers.

"Today? Nothing much. Office hours, then a few modifications I want to implement on the wards surrounding my data pads. Now that the things are actually working, I want to be sure they stay that way. Of course, if we're speaking in a literal sense, I believe there's a flying lesson being held today." Avoidance? Perish the thought.

[ninth-doctor.livejournal.com]

He gave her one of those 'I know you better than that and you know exactly what I mean' looks. "And what else?"

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

Oh, she recognized that look.

And chose to ignore it.

"I believe I saw Tinky-Winky dancing in the halls earlier. Though in this era, that's called 'getting down', I believe."

[ninth-doctor.livejournal.com]

"Anything negative I should be aware of?"

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

"In a scientific sense? Because I've been tinkering with a relation between negative electric charges and energy generated by an magic-field."

She smiled in a 'come on now, I'm not that easy' sort of way.

[ninth-doctor.livejournal.com]

All right, direct approach it was! "No, not in a scientific sense--in an emotional sense. What's wrong? I can tell something's wrong. And I hate to see people I know have something wrong with them. Unless they're people I dislike, then it's fun."

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

She sighed. Well, if he wanted to be direct and take all the fun out of it.

"This was hanging in the back of my closet." She tugged on the uniform's collar. "Whenever I opened my closet, my uniform used to be the first item hanging up. Pure practicality - I wore it everyday. This morning, I found it shoved in the back, behind my winter coat. I only noticed it because I was rooting around for a pair boots."

She traced an outline over her combadge, which she'd never been able to get properly working again. "I've started introducing myself as Professor Jadzia Dax. Not Lt. Commander Dax. I've started thinking of myself as Professor Dax. I'm not sure how I feel about that."

[ninth-doctor.livejournal.com]

He frowned. Oh, the adjustment to life at Hogwarts. "So then why are you wearing the uniform? For a bit of nostalgia?"

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

"I really couldn't tell you. It just felt wrong that I wasn't wearing it. It felt more wrong that I hadn't noticed." She leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes. "I can't help but feel that I've taken the easy way out."

[ninth-doctor.livejournal.com]

"You're not exactly on duty. You don't have to wear it. I'm not sayin' this is easy, but you're starting to develop your own life here. Friends, a career. If and when you get back to your proper place and time, you'll be back to being yourself. It's not the easy way out. There is no easy way out."

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

"There's the crux of it. If and when I get back, I don't know that I'll belong there anymore. That life - and I loved my life on DS9, make no mistake - who's to say that I'll fit back into it? I know I've changed. I mean, I'm used to change. Eight different lifetimes, after all. Nine, if you count a brief symbiont abduction. But this is different." She took a deep breath, willing down the feeling of panic in her chest.

"But I don't know that I belong here either. Not that I have much choice in the matter. To borrow a cliché, I just don't know who I am anymore. I've never had to wonder about that before." Honestly, Dax had hoped to go through only one identity crises per lifetime.

[ninth-doctor.livejournal.com]

"You really don't belong here. Neither do I. A lot of us don't. Plucked outta nowhere, plopped down here. We just gotta make the best of things. You don't lose old lives that quickly. You've adjusted to here pretty well in a relatively short amount of times. Getting back, I'm sure it wouldn't take you long at all to bounce right back. Besides. I think I've come to learn that you don't know who you are until you're not who you are anymore." If that even made sense. Well, it did to him.

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

"That makes sense. Kind of. If you squint," she teased. "All right then, Doctor. Humor me. Who do you think I am?"

[ninth-doctor.livejournal.com]

"'s not for me to say." Easy way out, but he wholeheartedly believed it. "I can say you're Jadzia Dax, I can say what you are, I can tell you traits, tidbits, facts, opinions, but that's not who you are."

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

"I am Jadzia Dax," she mused. For whatever it was worth. "That's not so bad." She smiled, and gave the Doctor a pat on the knee. "And for the record, Jadzia Dax is quite lucky to have you in her life. Even if you do leave your junk lying in the middle of the floor."

What? He did! ...Or was it her junk? Hm. Hard to keep track. She was a busy woman!

[ninth-doctor.livejournal.com]

"Oi! 's not my junk. You tried clearin' most of it out when you went chargin' in to my room and started throwing everything away!" Oh, now, don't make him grumpy. But he smiled anyway. Even hopped off the desk and scooped her up into a bear hug.

"You are Jadzia Dax, and I wouldn't have you any other way. I don't need any identity crisies from you, so you? Should just keep on bein' you. See, that's not so hard, is it?"

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

She scoffed. "I didn't throw out your junk! Just your trash!"

Oh, fine. If he wanted to hug his way out of it (was it her fault that most of his junk was trash?), she was hardly going to complain. Quite the opposite. Dax grinned, and leaned into the hug. Rested her chin on his shoulder, and took the opportunity to reach up and muss up the Doctor's hair not that there was all that much hair to muss up!.

"All right. You can consider all identity crises null and void. And you know what I forgot? This bloody uniform itches like crazy."

'Bloody'? Oh, lord help her. She was going native.

[ninth-doctor.livejournal.com]

"You'll find I don't wear anything as constricting as that. More like a catsuit, that is. But don't take my word when it comes to fashion advice. I've had bad judgment before. Not now, obviously, but y'know."

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

And wouldn't you know it, even mid-hugging, Dax couldn't let a story untopped?

"One of my previous hosts wore polyester. 80 years after they finally stopped making it."

[ninth-doctor.livejournal.com]

Oh ho, she was trying to top his previously horrendous sense of fashion? Well, might as well leave the big whammy for last. "Plaid pants. (http://www.scifiscience.co.uk/img/extras/doctorwho/doctors/troughton1.jpg) And a big furry coat (http://www.bbc.co.uk/doctorwho/classic/gallery/seconddoctor/troughton24.shtml) from time to time. Awful wool cap (http://www.bbc.co.uk/doctorwho/classic/gallery/seconddoctor/troughton33.shtml), too." But seriously, plaid! Plaid won out over polyester. At least polyester had actually been popular at one time.

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

She snorted, trying not to laugh. "Plaid pants and a wool cap?" No, sorry, that was full on laughter. "Oh, you've always been an old man, haven't you?"

[ninth-doctor.livejournal.com]

"I was in my youth!" ...No, now, that just sounded weird. But it was true! "First couple of lives, you should've seen me. I was an old-looking bastard back then. Been gettin' younger ever since!"

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

"Lucky! I'm a good sixty years younger than my last body, but that was due to natural aging. Hopefully, I'll grow into a crotchety old woman before it's time for a new host." At this point, she was in too good a mood to consider the possibility that there might not be a new host.

[ninth-doctor.livejournal.com]

"I was a crotchety old man at the end of my first. If you had asked me when I was still in school, I would've said I'd never let myself become that. I was a terror. An absolute, lazy terror."

[daxtastic.livejournal.com]

"I don't know that we would have gotten along! I was a bookworm. Completely, and utterly. Wanted to get into Starfleet, which is a selective process. Then I wanted to be joined, which is even more selective. Only one in a thousand Trill are chosen. It was only after joining with Dax that I learned to loosen up a bit." She smiled at the memory. "Have you ever been to Trill? It's lovely, this time of year."