Closed RP, Simon's office, Simon and Chance

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

By hook or by crook, he would get his sleep.

He stuck a bit of paper to his door -- The Doctor is out, please leave a message -- attached a quill to it, and shut the door firmly. He still refused to lock the door on principle. One never knew when someone would need medical care; thus, you never locked anything with medical supplies in it.

He turned down the lamps, even banked the fire to a dull glow, and stretched out on the couch again. He may dream, but at least most people wouldn't come in to pester him.

It was, perhaps, slightly more befitting that this time he was dreaming about Chance in a professorial costume, one part the robes of Hogwarts and one part the labcoats of home. But, well. He was pretty sure no professor he'd ever known had worn a top like that. Mmm.

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[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

Most people didn't include Chance, but then, she wasn't there to pester him. Actually, she'd been taking Simon at his word (http://community.livejournal.com/hogwarts_hocus/1111138.html?thread=56105058#t56105058) when he'd said she could make use of his office whether he was present or not. So the note on the door deterred her not at all.

She liked being here, for some reason she couldn't pinpoint. If anyone had asked her, she'd probably have cited the room's superficial similarity to the offices she remembered from her own university, a collage of things taken from other rooms and repurposed. Whatever the reason, from early on it had felt safer to be here than anywhere else amid the continually baffling and surprising -- often literally shifting -- topography of Hogwarts, and she was always able to find her way back to this room. When Simon was here, it was as companionable as when she'd shared an office with other teaching assistants as a graduate student, even though she really had no work to do now and mainly spent time aimlessly reading things she'd found in the library. When he wasn't here, she could curl up in her favorite chair and doze, or think.

Today she had a copy of Hogwarts: A History, and intended to read it. Since the note on the door said Simon was out, she didn't bother knocking, simply let herself in.

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

He'd meant what he said, every word, and if he'd known she'd taken advantage he'd have been glad of it. Right now, however, that wasn't what he was thinking about taking advantage of.

He shifted and rolled over, wrapping himself tighter in the blanket. Mmm. Professor. It wasn't until she was all the way in the room and the door thumped shut that he jerked awake, banging his head on the arm of the sofa and nearly tumbling off the side. "Mmzah?"

He extracted himself from the blanket and peered up over the back of the sofa, mussed hair and all. "Oh! Er. Dr. Silvey. Er, Chance. Hello!"

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

Chance stepped back, surprised. "Oh -- I'm sorry. It said you were out," gesturing toward the door that'd just closed behind her rather more roughly than she'd have let it close had she known someone was asleep inside.

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

... thank god the couch is between the two of them. "That's just there to drive off the people I don't really want to talk to." He scrambles to right his hair and pull the blanket back over his lap. "Er. It's fine, come in."

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

(( *kicks firefox, apologies for the multiple reposts ))

Chance looks at him sideways, not quite trusting the reassurance. He seems fairly unsettled. "Are you okay? I really didn't mean to startle you -- " Then something occurs to her. "You have nightmares too?"

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

"No! No no... I mean, yes, I... er. Well." He rakes his fingers through his hair and turns around on the couch to sit properly, giving himself a second to breathe. Yes. Breath.

And think of... cold things, and Maturin naked. Jayne Cobb. Surgery. Sports. Right. "What I mean to say is, yes, I'm fine, and yes I do have nightmares -- rather frequently, quite honestly -- but this time it was just... I was startled, that's all, and I haven't gotten much sleep lately."

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

And since he's turned around to sit properly, he's now facing away from Chance, which means she has to walk around the couch if she doesn't want to talk to the back of his head. So she does so. Goodbye, furniture barrier.

She is in fact wearing wizarding robes. She just also happens to be wearing layers of clothing under them, because damn, is Scotland cold. "Not sleeping? What's wrong? Not the wedding still?" She feels guilty for waking him up, hence the sudden burst of concern.

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

When he realizes she's coming around the couch he straightens himself and then pulls the bedding into his lap. To, er, make room for her to sit. "In part. River actually managed to interrupt my last attempt at a nap, for one." He's a bit flushed and he rubs his face. Oh hell, the robes. He clears his throat. "I see you're beginning to acclimate t the school's culture."

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

Chance shrugs. "I don't think the school has a culture." Since he's shifting the bedding to make space on the couch, she sits there. She had been intending to sit in the chair she likes, but that would be rude now that he's gone to the trouble of moving.

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

"Well, I haven't even been able to convince myself to try the robes yet," he says, with a nervous laugh.

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

Chance tilts her head. "They're comfortable," she says. "Lots of room under them." She means for layering purposes.

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

Like, for two people to snuggle in and... erm. WINTER. Think winter, Simon.

"They're just a little... different."

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

"Not all that different," says Chance, warming to the subject. "They're almost exactly the same as the robes I wore at the commencement ceremony when I got my doctorate. The other professors wear theirs to the ceremony as well. It's a leftover from the monastic origins of the university or something, I think."

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

Monks! Yes. He is like a monk. Zen. Be the monk, Simon. He's slowly starting to breathe a little easier. "Ah, we've mostly lost that tradition, in my time."

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

A wry half-smile. "I wish we'd lost it in mine. Commencement's in late spring, and by then the weather's already unbearably hot and humid. Oh, and generally it's held outdoors. I think by the end of it most of us were wishing the dean would hose us all down."

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

...wearing wet, clingy white robes... this isn't fair.

"The 'graduation' idea just isn't as important to medical doctors, for one thing." Well, that was kind of crap, but they liked to pretend they were too cool for it. "We did have a ceremony, but it was pretty short and sweet. I had a small class -- well, the honors students got our own ceremony, so that made it a small class."

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

"We're a large state university," Chance explains. "There aren't enough candidates receiving advanced degrees in a given year to warrant an individual ceremony for most departments, so they lump it all together. Makes for a long afternoon." She doesn't think about the fact she's speaking about her past in the present tense. She's comfortable now, the way she sometimes can be when she's here, and she gathers her hair back into a loose knot before snuggling down into the couch.

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

"I see." He nods a little, thoughtfully, and runs his thumb across his lip. OKay. Academia was a safe topic - he was calming down. "Do you miss it? Beyond the normalicy, do you miss that place in particular?"

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

"I guess you could say I do. I've been there all my life in one way or another. My grandparents taught there. Now I teach there." Present tense again but this time it does register. "Taught there. Not now." She shakes her head. "Still not used to this. I'm not sure when I will be." She woke up this morning half-wondering whether today would be the day Deke showed up. Only half-wondering because there's also still that part of her that expects everything to go poof all on its own.

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

"I'm still not. Don't push yourself." He offers a little half-smile. "I'm not sure anyone really is."

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

But now she's on edge again. She's still holding that copy of Hogwarts: A History, except now more hugging it than holding it. "Hence the nightmares, I suppose," she says, "and here I am waking you up when you do manage to sleep." Biting her lip.

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

"That, and a bounty hunter, and Reavers," he agrees, with a wry twist. "It's really all right. I told you any time, and I meant it."

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

Reavers? Unfamiliar term. She picks up on it and she'll remember it later; she doesn't want to ask about it now.

"I know you did," and she does know, and believes it, otherwise she wouldn't have shown up in the first place. "And I appreciate it, I really do. But it's your office." Not his bedroom, and it occurs to her to wonder why he doesn't sleep there, but she won't ask that either. "And you've got to sleep sometime." She's gotten up now, arms wrapped around the thick book in such a way that the robes are drawn more tightly around her.

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

"... if you're sure. I could just go back to sleep, and try not to dream..." He gestures to her chair. But if she's going to let him sleep, he's grateful.

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

Chance shakes her head, eyes hard and distant. "If there's one thing I've learned over the past few years, it's that trying not to dream won't do a damn bit of good."

Of course, when she says this, she's thinking of her nightmares, long before everything that went down with the werewolf bitch, back when she dreamed of Dancy Flammarion, and Dancy Flammarion dreamed of her.

If she knew what Simon had been dreaming, she might have chosen her words a bit differently.

"Seeing as how I let myself in, I can let myself out," she says, and gives him a faint smile. "But if you have that dream again ... well, owl me, okay?"

Thinking it was a nightmare.

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

Oh. Damn. Erm. Well. Uh. He looked a bit red in the cheeks, and stared down at his shoes. "S... sure."

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

"I mean it," says Chance. "You shouldn't have to go through that alone."

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

"... I'll keep that in mind." Now he was definately bright red, and completely unable to look at her.

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

God, whatever Reavers are, it must be really horrible if he can't even look at her. Worried, she tucks the book under one arm and leans over to touch his shoulder. "I'd tell you it was only a dream if I thought it would help," she says, "but I'm not going to lie. The therapist I had in Alabama, a few years back, used to tell me: 'This isn't about what's factual, Chance. This is about what's true.' If you're dreaming about something that isn't here, but the dreams won't stop, then it's as bad as if the thing really were here, isn't it? But I'll do what I can. Really. I'll be in the library if you need me."

[igotahamster.livejournal.com]

"The, uh, problem, I suppose," he says, all but hugging the pillows in his lap, "is the possibility that it might show up. Probabilities and possibilities are the hobgoblins of imagination. Go ahead," he adds, trying to not sound like there's a please in that, "I'll be fine."

[chance-silvey.livejournal.com]

"If you say so," says Chance, who clearly thinks this a dubious prospect. As she's closing the door behind her and walking away from the office, she's thinking how selfish she's been: she only ever talks with him about her demons. For all she knows it's likelier his Reavers will show up in the Sorting Room one day than that Deke will ever find Hogwarts.