Application for Ranma Saotome (Ranma 1/2)

[nocoldwaterplz.livejournal.com]

Ranma casually strolls into the sorting room, his hands in his pockets. He slumps down in a chair as he awaits the questioning to begin. "Alright, let's do this!... Hey, wait... There aint gonna be any cold water around here, is there?"


1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?

Ranma scratched his head. "The hell? What kinda question is that? Any kind, I guess. As long as it's not made by Akane!"

2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?

"Eh, I'm not big on killing anything. I dunno who those guys are, either. But hey, if one of 'em wants to fight, I'm up for it!"

3. What time is it where you are?

"Night time. Why the hell does it matter?"

4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order
of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus
Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.

"I dunno who the hell any of those people are. But I'll tell ya what, sexual harassment is a pain in the ass! I should know, I go through it almost daily..."

5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend,
in the dark.

"Saotome's Sake Hut... I'm not a huge drinker, though."

B. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or
George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.

"Woah woah woah... You're askin' the wrong guy! My luck with marriages is so freakin' pathetic... I have more fiances than most people do fingers!"

C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated
with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.

"Wait... What was that about the thing now?"

D. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.

"Psh, the Anything Goes Martial Arts style is my specialty. When it comes to a fight, I can beat about anyone! I'm sure of it!"

6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you.
Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the
bribe.
Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't
really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly.
The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.

Ranma thinks for a second. "Well, I guess I could train ya in the Anything Goes Martial Arts style. And if ya need any help with something, I can probably get it taken care of. I dunno, you tell me what ya want."



I have read the hogwarts_hocus FAQ, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. Ranma Saotome
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one. Ranma Saotome
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. Ranma Saotome
One day, marmalade will rule the world. Ranma Saotome

Comments

[carri3-whit3.livejournal.com]

What's wrong with cold water?

[nocoldwaterplz.livejournal.com]

"Well, ya see... I went trainin' in this place called Jusenkyo in China. I fell in this cursed spring where a girl drowned 1000 years ago. So now when I get splashed with cold water, I turn into a girl. Pretty freaky, huh?"

[carri3-whit3.livejournal.com]

*blinks*

What's wrong with bein' a girl? I didn't have any problems with bein' a guy, when I was in a guy's body for a while.

[kawaii-on-ice.livejournal.com]

Azusa storms in, looking irate.

"Ranma Saotome, you've got some nerve showing up here! First you steal away poor little Charlotte, then you try to take Azusa's darling Marianne, and now you're after Audrey, aren't you!? You won't get away with this!"

[nocoldwaterplz.livejournal.com]

Ranma spotted Azusa storm in the room as she threw accusation after accusation at him. "Aw gawd, what the hell are you doing here? And whaddaya mean I try to steal stuff?! You're the one who picks up every single thing ya see and give it a stupid name!" Ranma was clearly annoyed with Azusa's presence in the room.

[kawaii-on-ice.livejournal.com]

"What am I doing here?" Azusa huffs, tossing her hair over her shoulder. "This is Azusa's castle, so I should be asking you the same question!"

"You heard me, you thief," She folds her arms across her chest. "Azusa saw Audrey first, so finders keepers!"

[battlefranky36.livejournal.com]

"So, you say you can beat anyone, eh? You don't look like you could," Franky said, trying to look as tough as possible, which isn't that hard when your forearms are thicker than most people's waists.

[nocoldwaterplz.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, I'm pretty confident that I could." Ranma jumped up in the air, landing with one arm supporting his weight. After roughly a minute, he launched forward, landing on his feet. "Shouldn't go by looks. Never know what someone's capable of."

[battlefranky36.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, but I'm pretty sure I'm a better fighter than you," Franky said, grinning. "I mean, have you ever hit a guy with an elephant? Or fought a giant sea monster and won?"

[soggynotecards.livejournal.com]

*Demyx blinks.* So how'd you end up with that many girlfriends?

[nocoldwaterplz.livejournal.com]

Ranma rubbed his temples. "Most of it was my stupid pop's fault. I can't tell ya how many times he used me as marriage bait to get somethin'. Pisses me off pretty bad, ta be honest with ya. Plus, most of those girls are crazy anyway."

[soggynotecards.livejournal.com]

Before I came here, the only girl I knew was crazy... and by crazy, I mean sadistic.

Oh, and I should warn you, if there's something you'd rather not have happen, it's almost guaranteed that it will around here... case in point. Aguamenti. *A jet of water shoots out of Demyx's wand and sprays Ranma in the face. Demyx grins.* Welcome to Hogwarts, kid.

[sada-chan.livejournal.com]

Wouldn't you like to be in Hufflepuff with me?

[nocoldwaterplz.livejournal.com]

This girl was... strange. And not in a good way. But Ranma didn't like to judge people without at least talking to them once. Nor did he realize what this girl might do to him. "Uh, sure, why not?"

[sam-the-slayer.livejournal.com]

"How many fiances are 'too many'? And if marriage is an issue, why haven't you done it already? Then you wouldn't have to worry about the extra fiances."

[nocoldwaterplz.livejournal.com]

Ranma let out an annoyed sigh. "Somewhere around eight or nine... And when they're all tryin' ta kill each other, it makes it kinda hard ta settle down with another." Ranma blushed slightly. "I mean, yeah, there might be one I like better than the others... But I aint ready for marriage yet."

[sam-the-slayer.livejournal.com]

"Hmmm. Where I come from that wouldn't have been an issue. You'd just go to the Wall and that would be that."

[nocoldwaterplz.livejournal.com]

Ranma quirked an eyebrow. "The Wall? What the hell?"

[fantastic-rose.livejournal.com]

"A guy tired of sexual harassment? Heh. They do exist. Interesting. You're that popular?"

(I fail at posting from the right journal, sorry. *sigh*)

[nocoldwaterplz.livejournal.com]

Ranma let out a sigh. "If ya wanna put it that way, sure. I'd call it freakin' horrible luck, m'self."

[thevandortboy.livejournal.com]

Victor quirked an eyebrow. He'd never met anyone else who'd been engaged to more than one person at a time before. Maybe they could form a club! "Er... if you don't mind my asking, how did you end up with so many fiances?"

[nocoldwaterplz.livejournal.com]

Ranma let out an annoyed sigh. "Mostly my pop... That guy gives me away like Imma disease or somethin'. Then there's just other ones that are too weird to even bother explainin'."

[ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com]

Are you not a fan of cold showers, then?

[nocoldwaterplz.livejournal.com]

Ranma shook his head. "Nah... Let's just say it causes my feminine side ta come out..."

Gryffindor!

[ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com]

You're not a drinker, so Ravenclaw's right out. You're not devious enough to be a Slytherin. I haven't seen your female form so I can't say whether you're a cute enough girl to be a Hufflepuff. By the process of elimination:

Your bribe has been accepted!

Welcome to Gryffindor!