[identity profile] goroeneru.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] hh_mirror
A man with rather long earlobes and drums on his back suddenly appears in the great hall.  Quickly glancing from side to side, he looks very confused.  Before he could ask where he was, a voice started to ask him questions.

1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?

Cheese? I don’t like cheese. I prefer apples. Ah, the food of the gods.


2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?

Well, it really depends. Which one of them would go against me first?


3. What time is it where you are?

I don’t really care. It’s going to be night soon, I think.


4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.

What? I’m sorry, but I’m not really familiar with this Order of the Phoenix. That’s not to say that I wouldn’t sexually harass any of them, though.

5. If you are pushing to be in:

A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.

Are you saying that I should be reduced to bartending? That is an insult upon my very being! Do you not know that I am a god?!

B. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.

He should marry the least rebellious of the two. Rebellious types don’t last very long, for various reasons.

C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.

You obviously aren’t working hard enough for your god. If you are given work to do, should you not finish it with a smile on your face and loyalty in your heart?

D. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.

Bahahaha! Not useless? Of course I’m not useless! I am a god! I can hear all that happens with my strongest mantra! I can turn into lightning! Is this the foolishness of those mortals from the blue seas?

6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you.

Me? Offer a bribe? What foolishness is this? All I have to offer is a place in my new kingdom for those that I deem worthy. And, if I must, I can offer a few small trinkets of gold.


"I have read the [community profile] hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. _God Eneru_
I have read the [community profile] hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. _God Eneru_.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. _God Eneru_.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. _God Eneru_"

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