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hh_mirrorTamaki has applied to Hogwarts. Don't ask why, just read his app.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Brillat-Savarin! Few things go better with a glass of champagne while sitting before a fire on a cold night with a couple pretty girls. The "cabin fireplace scene" is always very popular, you know.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Who are "Barney" and "Carrottop"? They sound suspiciously common, which would, no doubt, explain why I've never heard of them. Would you expect a member of the Royal Ballet or a performer in the Vienna Philharmonic Orchestra to have a name like "Carrottop"? Most certainly not!
I'm sure someone will eventually explain the identity of these "commoner superstars" to me. In the meantime, I think I'd have to ask my security to dispose of "Carrottop" first. He sounds like a red-head, which reminds me of those twins, Hikaru and Kaoru. I think they've been trying to cozy up to Haruhi again. As her dear father, I cannot possibly permit that!
3. What time is it where you are?
Time for the Host Club, of course! It's always time for the Host Club. Otherwise, some ladies might be disappointed!
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
That's tricky, especially since I don't "sexually harass" people. I "give hospitality" to lovely ladies!
But that Albus seems like a classic "pervy old man" type. So if I were good old Dumbly, I'd go for... Remus Lupin. Now that he's hooked up with that Nymphadora Tonks, he could use some "host training". And who better to teach him how to make a lady happy than a man who has an entire lifetime of experience in that very art?
Ah, it's perfect!
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
The Bar of Dark Despair Because Those Damn Twins won't Leave Haruhi Alone.
B. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Fred and George... Fred and George... Oh, the homo side characters! Well, I think he should wind up married to both of them. Then perhaps that other set of red-headed twins will follow their example and find some nice boy to settle down with, leaving my dear Haruhi all to me!
World mythology? ... Kyoya! Provide the nice people with some samples. I must return to my duties! My ladies await!
C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Well, about a week ago, Hikaru and Kaoru started depositing paper by the truckload on my desk to try and keep me occupied while they hung out with Haruhi. I asked Honey to deal with it and went back to work. Kyoya tells me that Honey ordered his special operations fanboys to move the paperwork to your desk as fast as it arrived on mine.
I apologize most profusely. It was a very inelegant and impolite thing of him to do. But he's young (well, not really), so you can't expect him to think things through properly.
Would a cup of tea and a free coupon for an hour of Host Services make it up to you?
D. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.
Useless? Useless! *cowers in a corner, muttering to himself* Useless... I'm the Lord of the Host Club, I couldn't be useless! But if I weren't useless, surely Haruhi would be unable to resist my charms?
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
Kyoya has prepared a "special" selection of calendars and photo shoot books featuring the Lord of the Host Club. We have "Tropical Paradise Tamaki", "Gym Exercise Tamaki" - including extra bonus shower photos!, "Tuxedo Formal Tamaki", and, a special for the witches and wizards in the audience, "Quidditch Master Tamaki"! All available for free!
*whisperwhisperwhisper* ... Limit of three per person, Kyoya informs me.
1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?
Brillat-Savarin! Few things go better with a glass of champagne while sitting before a fire on a cold night with a couple pretty girls. The "cabin fireplace scene" is always very popular, you know.
2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?
Who are "Barney" and "Carrottop"? They sound suspiciously common, which would, no doubt, explain why I've never heard of them. Would you expect a member of the Royal Ballet or a performer in the Vienna Philharmonic Orchestra to have a name like "Carrottop"? Most certainly not!
I'm sure someone will eventually explain the identity of these "commoner superstars" to me. In the meantime, I think I'd have to ask my security to dispose of "Carrottop" first. He sounds like a red-head, which reminds me of those twins, Hikaru and Kaoru. I think they've been trying to cozy up to Haruhi again. As her dear father, I cannot possibly permit that!
3. What time is it where you are?
Time for the Host Club, of course! It's always time for the Host Club. Otherwise, some ladies might be disappointed!
4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.
That's tricky, especially since I don't "sexually harass" people. I "give hospitality" to lovely ladies!
But that Albus seems like a classic "pervy old man" type. So if I were good old Dumbly, I'd go for... Remus Lupin. Now that he's hooked up with that Nymphadora Tonks, he could use some "host training". And who better to teach him how to make a lady happy than a man who has an entire lifetime of experience in that very art?
Ah, it's perfect!
5. If you are pushing to be in:
A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.
The Bar of Dark Despair Because Those Damn Twins won't Leave Haruhi Alone.
B. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.
Fred and George... Fred and George... Oh, the homo side characters! Well, I think he should wind up married to both of them. Then perhaps that other set of red-headed twins will follow their example and find some nice boy to settle down with, leaving my dear Haruhi all to me!
World mythology? ... Kyoya! Provide the nice people with some samples. I must return to my duties! My ladies await!
C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.
Well, about a week ago, Hikaru and Kaoru started depositing paper by the truckload on my desk to try and keep me occupied while they hung out with Haruhi. I asked Honey to deal with it and went back to work. Kyoya tells me that Honey ordered his special operations fanboys to move the paperwork to your desk as fast as it arrived on mine.
I apologize most profusely. It was a very inelegant and impolite thing of him to do. But he's young (well, not really), so you can't expect him to think things through properly.
Would a cup of tea and a free coupon for an hour of Host Services make it up to you?
D. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.
Useless? Useless! *cowers in a corner, muttering to himself* Useless... I'm the Lord of the Host Club, I couldn't be useless! But if I weren't useless, surely Haruhi would be unable to resist my charms?
6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe.
Kyoya has prepared a "special" selection of calendars and photo shoot books featuring the Lord of the Host Club. We have "Tropical Paradise Tamaki", "Gym Exercise Tamaki" - including extra bonus shower photos!, "Tuxedo Formal Tamaki", and, a special for the witches and wizards in the audience, "Quidditch Master Tamaki"! All available for free!
*whisperwhisperwhisper* ... Limit of three per person, Kyoya informs me.
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