((Aziraphale, Good Omens, with Agnes & Crowley-mun's okays!
Original app is
here. Open RP once Aziraphale gets into the hallways! Feel free to chat!))
Aziraphale heard a pop. Not a small one, that pop. He wondered why he was hearing a pop at all, and smelling salt and butter, when he realized where he was. Aziraphale, Principality Extraordinaire, opposite number of Crowley (eternally speaking, that is), had just ceased being popcorn. Aziraphale sighed, heavily. He hated popcorn.
This did explain much, though. For example, the fact that he had been in a sort of limbo that, theologically, he could not account for. It was not like the Roman Catholic purgatory, it was not the negation of being that existentialists posit, and it wasn't heaven and most certainly wasn't hell. Those, he would recognize. So, he took stock. Last he remembered, he was at Hogwarts in Scotland, well after the first apocalypse had been averted. Crowley was there, and... well... the rest seemed rather fuzzy.
For that matter, it all seemed rather difficult to recall. He shrugged to himself, and winced at the noise of smearing butter. Hopefully, he had a clean set of clothes in his room - if it was still his room. Let's find out, he thought, and made his way out of the Popcorn Room.
As he walked down the halls, flashes of memories would approach, nod at him politely, and then leave without offering a contact phone number. Bugger all this for a lark, he thought. How did he get popcorned?
God might have done it. S/He had an odd sense of humor. Human sexuality - that was one hilarious notion. But popcorn? From what Aziraphale remembered, the Almighty wasn't that fond of popcorn, either. S/He was more of a mixed nuts kind of nibbler.
Crowley wouldn't have done it. They had 6,000 years of friendship. Another reason Crowley wouldn't do it is he would have never risked getting butter and salt anywhere near the Bentley.
Then who, and how? And where in the ineffing universe was Hufflepuff?