hh_mirror

((OOC : edited for formatting fail. *sigh* Again.))

Raistlin was returning from his encounter with the dragons of Hogwarts, feeling quite pleased with how things had gone. He looked forward to future conversations with Nidhogg and was anticipating a meeting with this mysterious ‘Arioch’.

“Who turned out the lights?! I’ve gone blind! Pick on an old man will you? I’ll show you! What’s the name of that spell? Firecracker? Featherball? Ow!” The howl was in a voice so familiar it stopped him in his tracks. Raistlin whirled, pushing open the door to the Sorting Room. A short old man in tattered mouse-colored robes was flailing underneath one of the hanging tapestries that had somehow come off the wall. Raistlin passed by two house elves who were nearly doubled over with laughter. He pulled the heavy tapestry back and stared. Fizban. The avatar of Paladine, the Platinum Dragon, in the guise of a doddering old wizard had somehow found his way to Hogwarts.

"You!" was all the stunned mage could stammer out.

“Wha?” The old man jabbed a bony finger at Raistlin, “Never startle an old man, sonny! Especially a wizard! It’s dangerous!” He squinted, “Oh.. it’s you, isn’t it? Can’t say I care for your change in color scheme, kid. Black is not your color. I always thought you were more of a summer with that gold skin of yours. But that’s how kids are, going against tradition,” the old man tutted. “So,” he sat back, clapping his battered and misshapen hat on his head. “Where are we? Are there damsels that need saving? Castles to be stormed? Brothers that need help?”

The last question caused Raistlin’s scowl to deepen. Caramon was something of a sore spot. “My brother is not here, he does not need me and I certainly do not need him.”

As he stalked out of the Sorting room, Fizban shook his head sadly, “Poor, misguided boy.”

State your name.

“Wait, wait. I know this one.”

~~Zifnab~~
~~Zanfib~~

“Oh give me that!” Fizban made a wild grab for the dictaquill which hovered right out of his reach. “Hmph! Fine. Fizban the Great!”

What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?

At the mention of food, the old wizard brightened, “Any kind! Fried cheese is the best. Does terrible things to you but it’s so tasty. I wonder if Otik ever put cheese over those spiced potatoes of his..” Fizban trailed off for a moment before patting his stomach. “Say.. when’s lunch?”

Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?

“Kill? Look, I’m the wizard of the group. I stand in the back and fire the spells. You want someone killed, you send in your big strong fighter, not me! Besides, what kind of person sends in the old man first? Huh? Some tactician you are.”

What time is it where you are?

“Time? Time doesn’t matter when you get to be my age, sonny! Typical kids, not respecting their elders,” he muttered, still eyeing the dictaquill.

If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.

“I don’t harass! Relationships are better left to the young humans and elves. Like those two barbarians, Goldmoon and Whats-his-face or the half elf and his lovely lady. I always did like those elves. Still, magic and love don’t mix.” He made a face, “They don’t mix well, anyway.”

If you are pushing to be in:

Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.

“Never drink and cast spells,” he cautioned, waggling his finger at the application. “You wind up with misfired spells and a serious headache.”

The quill tapped the paper insistently. That wasn’t exactly an answer.

“Ah, um yes. The.. The Dragon’s Claw.” That sounded nice and dramatic to him. A perfect place for heroes and the like to meet.

Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.

Fizban scratched his head, “He should marry whichever one he wants and let the other one down easy. Seems the right thing to do. And what does mythology have to do with it? Most of the mythic relationships ended pretty badly. Not a lot of happy endings for the gods, you know. Don’t you read your history?

C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.

“Paperwork? I think I have a spell to help with that.” He hefted a spellbook and began flipping through the pages. “Fireball, wasn’t it.. now how did that go..” he was lost in the pages, muttering and waving one hand in the air when the dictaquill, perhaps in a desperate move of self-preservation, tapped the application sharply to distract the wizard from immolating the desk.

Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.

For a moment, the outline of a massive silver dragon could be seen curling around behind the old man. Unlike other dragons, this one did not inspire fear or images of destruction. It was majestic, spreading it’s wings and inclining it’s head in a somewhat noble manner. Some dragons destroyed or hoarded, this one did not. He was a protector, a guardian.

The wizard for the most part, put his hands on his hips and cocked his head. “How’s that? Pfft, call me useless. You kids, judging books by their covers..”

6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.

“You brought me here, why am I bribing you?” he challenged. “Oh fine.. I could tell you about the time I saved Krynn with a fine group of people.” Fizban rummaged around in his pockets and produced a small gold dragon with red gems for eyes, “He has been nothing but trouble. You can take him, but only if you have a good singing voice.”

I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. Fizban
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. No, Zifnab
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. Zanfib?