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hh_mirror2009-10-24 05:05 pm
i-am-harkonnen.livejournal.com) wrote in hh_mirror2009-10-24 05:05 pm
Entry tags:
Muggle Studies
((Jasper's inclusion with permission and additions of his player. If you require Vlad's attention, please say something to this extent in the comment subject line so I don't somehow miss it, thanks!))
The Baron Vladimir Harkonnen wanted his first class to be practical and entertaining, so he had chosen "An Introduction to Muggle Weaponry" as the topic. In order to make the class interesting, he'd decided it would be a hands-on experience, and had negotiated with Basher Tarr to obtain an assortment of Muggle weapons, mainly a quantity of AK-47 assault rifles, along with plenty of ammunition. These had been marked with stenciled letters declaring them "Property of the Muggle Studies Department", and were now stacked up neatly on a table at the front of the room, near some crates bearing the same lettering, and a rocket launcher. A section of the room had been magically expanded, and turned into an indoor firing range, complete with human-shaped targets, and the usual classroom area was equipped with rows of neatly-lined desks.
The Baron remained in a large, comfortable chair at the front of the classroom, his assistant Jasper beside him, and chatted quietly with him about a few details of the lesson plan as he waited for the last students to arrive and seat themselves at the desks. When it seemed that no more were going to appear, he floated up and shut the door with a flick of his wand. The deep, melodic basso of his voice carried easily over the chatter.
"Welcome to Muggle Studies. The subject we'll be covering today is potentially dangerous, so pay attention!"This declaration was accompanied by one of his disarmingly cherubic smiles. "The first thing that you need to know about Muggles is that even though they often are extremely silly, they are still capable of wreaking havoc and destruction. It's one of their favorite activities, but somehow, they still haven't managed to obliterate themselves. As there are a great deal more of them than there are of us, even though their methods are often crude, in a war of attrition, the wizarding world might have a problem. So, today I am going to familiarize you with some of the most commonly used weapons in current ground warfare."
He gestured at Jasper, who brought him an AK-47, which he held up and explained, "This is one of the most common Muggle weapons, the assault rifle. This model is the AK-47, a basic piece of artillery used by infantry. It was developed in the admirable nation of Russia, from which my own House claims ancient roots, and came into predominance shortly after the conflict known as World War II. It's operation is simple, and its main feature is that of selective firing modes- it can be operated either as semi- or fully automatic. In fully automatic mode, its range is shorter and less accurate, but as it is generally used in close confrontations, it is effective enough. The semi-automatic mode is more effective at a distance. This is not a very advanced weapon, but, it's still killed millions of Muggles." The Baron demonstrated loading a cartridge into the weapon, flicked off the safety, cocked the mechanism, and turned to fire a round through one of the lined-up targets, with perfect aim. He then flipped it to the fully automatic mode, and opened fire again at the same target- the spray of bullets was less accurate, but still shredded the target's torso region. "Magic or no, you don't want to find yourself surrounded by a horde of Muggles with these." He passed the AK-47 back to Jasper, and indicated the nearby boxes, and Jasper brought him a specimen of their contents after replacing the rifle.
"This is an M67 fragmentation grenade." He held up the grenade for the class to see. "This is a common anti-personnel weapon. It's a basic explosive, based upon filling the enemy with lethal bits of shrapnel. It's not a pleasant way to go. These are commonly used in ground combat, as, they are inexpensive to produce and easy to transport. Their effective radius is a mere 15 yards, and its lethal radius even less- but enough of these tossed into oncoming troops can be painful." With a smile, he removed the safety clip, pulled the pin, and tossed the grenade into a corner of the magically expanded area, where it exploded. The magically enlarged area was intentionally big enough that he could do this without maiming the students, although the nearby targets were mangled. "If those were people, they would not be feeling well now. The Muggles have several varieties of grenades, including concussion grenades that work best in enclosed areas, and incendiary grenades, designed to damage structures."
He drifted over to the rocket launcher, which he laid a hand on as he spoke. "And this little beauty is the M47 dragon, a shoulder-mounted rocket launcher. This model is slightly out of date, but effective. This weapon is primarily used against armored vehicles such as the tank, which unfortunately I have not been able to obtain yet. I'd demonstrate it, but, I'd prefer the walls to stay in one piece. However, if you attend the second portion of my class, you may have a chance to try it for yourself, along with the various sorts of grenades."
"Now, each of you will take one of these AK-47s, a cartridge of ammunition, and pair up with a partner. If you have experience with such weaponry, please find a less experienced student to assist. You will load the weapon, and you will attempt to hit one of these targets, while standing behind this line." He indicated a white line stretching in front of the targets. "You will try both modes, and learn the different feel of each one. And, you will not shoot each other with them. At this time." He grinned slightly, as he added, "Part two of the class is optional and will be held at a later date, but I encourage all of you to attend. We will be having a little Muggle-style war game on the grounds, and, you will be welcome to try and shoot each other then." A faint shimmer went up around the Baron as he flicked on his personal shield and settled back into his chair, watching for any that might need assistance. Jasper moved to join the students, ready to offer help as well or remove any troublemakers as needed. He didn't bother with any sort of shield, since getting shot didn't concern him.
The Baron Vladimir Harkonnen wanted his first class to be practical and entertaining, so he had chosen "An Introduction to Muggle Weaponry" as the topic. In order to make the class interesting, he'd decided it would be a hands-on experience, and had negotiated with Basher Tarr to obtain an assortment of Muggle weapons, mainly a quantity of AK-47 assault rifles, along with plenty of ammunition. These had been marked with stenciled letters declaring them "Property of the Muggle Studies Department", and were now stacked up neatly on a table at the front of the room, near some crates bearing the same lettering, and a rocket launcher. A section of the room had been magically expanded, and turned into an indoor firing range, complete with human-shaped targets, and the usual classroom area was equipped with rows of neatly-lined desks.
The Baron remained in a large, comfortable chair at the front of the classroom, his assistant Jasper beside him, and chatted quietly with him about a few details of the lesson plan as he waited for the last students to arrive and seat themselves at the desks. When it seemed that no more were going to appear, he floated up and shut the door with a flick of his wand. The deep, melodic basso of his voice carried easily over the chatter.
"Welcome to Muggle Studies. The subject we'll be covering today is potentially dangerous, so pay attention!"This declaration was accompanied by one of his disarmingly cherubic smiles. "The first thing that you need to know about Muggles is that even though they often are extremely silly, they are still capable of wreaking havoc and destruction. It's one of their favorite activities, but somehow, they still haven't managed to obliterate themselves. As there are a great deal more of them than there are of us, even though their methods are often crude, in a war of attrition, the wizarding world might have a problem. So, today I am going to familiarize you with some of the most commonly used weapons in current ground warfare."
He gestured at Jasper, who brought him an AK-47, which he held up and explained, "This is one of the most common Muggle weapons, the assault rifle. This model is the AK-47, a basic piece of artillery used by infantry. It was developed in the admirable nation of Russia, from which my own House claims ancient roots, and came into predominance shortly after the conflict known as World War II. It's operation is simple, and its main feature is that of selective firing modes- it can be operated either as semi- or fully automatic. In fully automatic mode, its range is shorter and less accurate, but as it is generally used in close confrontations, it is effective enough. The semi-automatic mode is more effective at a distance. This is not a very advanced weapon, but, it's still killed millions of Muggles." The Baron demonstrated loading a cartridge into the weapon, flicked off the safety, cocked the mechanism, and turned to fire a round through one of the lined-up targets, with perfect aim. He then flipped it to the fully automatic mode, and opened fire again at the same target- the spray of bullets was less accurate, but still shredded the target's torso region. "Magic or no, you don't want to find yourself surrounded by a horde of Muggles with these." He passed the AK-47 back to Jasper, and indicated the nearby boxes, and Jasper brought him a specimen of their contents after replacing the rifle.
"This is an M67 fragmentation grenade." He held up the grenade for the class to see. "This is a common anti-personnel weapon. It's a basic explosive, based upon filling the enemy with lethal bits of shrapnel. It's not a pleasant way to go. These are commonly used in ground combat, as, they are inexpensive to produce and easy to transport. Their effective radius is a mere 15 yards, and its lethal radius even less- but enough of these tossed into oncoming troops can be painful." With a smile, he removed the safety clip, pulled the pin, and tossed the grenade into a corner of the magically expanded area, where it exploded. The magically enlarged area was intentionally big enough that he could do this without maiming the students, although the nearby targets were mangled. "If those were people, they would not be feeling well now. The Muggles have several varieties of grenades, including concussion grenades that work best in enclosed areas, and incendiary grenades, designed to damage structures."
He drifted over to the rocket launcher, which he laid a hand on as he spoke. "And this little beauty is the M47 dragon, a shoulder-mounted rocket launcher. This model is slightly out of date, but effective. This weapon is primarily used against armored vehicles such as the tank, which unfortunately I have not been able to obtain yet. I'd demonstrate it, but, I'd prefer the walls to stay in one piece. However, if you attend the second portion of my class, you may have a chance to try it for yourself, along with the various sorts of grenades."
"Now, each of you will take one of these AK-47s, a cartridge of ammunition, and pair up with a partner. If you have experience with such weaponry, please find a less experienced student to assist. You will load the weapon, and you will attempt to hit one of these targets, while standing behind this line." He indicated a white line stretching in front of the targets. "You will try both modes, and learn the different feel of each one. And, you will not shoot each other with them. At this time." He grinned slightly, as he added, "Part two of the class is optional and will be held at a later date, but I encourage all of you to attend. We will be having a little Muggle-style war game on the grounds, and, you will be welcome to try and shoot each other then." A faint shimmer went up around the Baron as he flicked on his personal shield and settled back into his chair, watching for any that might need assistance. Jasper moved to join the students, ready to offer help as well or remove any troublemakers as needed. He didn't bother with any sort of shield, since getting shot didn't concern him.
no subject
"We all gets de camels-flage armours then? And de Shoggies gets de Viking horns and little axes and stuff," Skwisgaar decided. At least that settled the argument about what to wear, and he was enjoying the fact Toki and the Shoggies had all seemed to genuinely like his idea, and weren't just humouring him. Camouflage maybe wasn't very metal, but sneaking up to put a bullet in someone's head kind of was -- still wasn't nearly as cool as using a sword or battle axe would be, though, in his opinion. Hopefully they could use more than just guns for the class.
"I hopes they dos forgets," he fervently agreed, for the moment forgetting he'd wanted to make Toki jealous. "Don'ts even wants to pretends to fuck dat guy evens if Nathans scrubs him with de bleach. Now wes just needs to gets de cameras equipsment for us... Eh. Can gets it later." Rather, they could have Ofdensen get it for them later, maybe along with the armour. Skwisgaar was sure they'd both be too drunk to operate a camera anytime in the immediate future, and there was no way the Shoggies would be allowed to do it, so there was no rush. "Ours Dethphones has de little cameras too," he remembered, suddenly smirking again. "Wouldn'ts wants to accidentally sends it to de other guys, though..." But what a way to come out that would be.
"Pfft, not has you shots anybody, has you dones body shots. Yous don'ts shoots no one dere. I shows you." Which could probably be fun foreplay, he thought, especially if he incorporated a blowjob into it the way he was envisioning. He hadn't ever done it before, but it couldn't be that complicated, and it might even feel pretty nice, with the lime and all. As they reached the Ravenclaw bar he leant closer to Toki, murmuring next to his ear, "I gives to you de special kinds. You's will likes it. Then you dos whatever yous wants on me."
no subject
"We's can reminds Master-Charles to gets for yous the camels-flage and to gets for us the Vikings horns and axes since he's the butler," exclaimed Shoggy 18. It was likely it would actually remember, since the Shoggies were so excited about the whole idea. Toki would have insisted that camoflauge was pretty metal, since war was an incredibly brutal thing, and therefore, soldiers were brutal, and soldiers wore camoflauge, and so the Toki-logic circuit was completed. He didn't have any arguements about guns, either- they were just as fun as swords. Maybe funner, since he was better at guns than swords. Although the class would technically promote the use of guns, the Baron actually expected the students to use whatever they were smart enough to bring along as well- in other words, he expected them to cheat. He'd be disappointed if they didn't. Cheating was the true key to winning most games, in his opinion.
"And we cans reminds Master Nathans to forgets abouts the sex scenes withs Murderface too!" announce Shoggy 3. Toki shook his head fervently and told it, "No, dont's tell him thats, else he will remembers, and we dont's want him to." The Shoggy seemed confused by this, but, at least appeared to accept Toki's order, although it was of the opinion that reminding someone to forget would assist them in forgetting.
"Yeah, we probably don't wants to films stuffs on our phones. Its would be alls grainy, besides. I bets we could borrow a cameras from that huge pervert teacher?" He'd noticed a plethora of television-oriented equiptment lying around the Muggle Studies room, and was pretty sure he remembered seeing a camera or two. And presumably, schools were supposed to lend equiptment out to students who needed it. "We coulds just makes up a story why we needs it." Not that this would have been necessary when dealing with the Baron, but, Toki didn't know this.
Toki looked a bit confused as Skwisgaar apparently hadn't meant shooting people. "But shots in the body, that's how you kills people? Or do you means. . .shots, likes the gettings drunk?" Perhaps he'd misunderstood? From Skwisgaar's reaction, he had. Whatever the idea was, apparently it was likely to be a fun one, and not for Shoggy eyes, from the way Skwisgaar was murmuring. And then he got to do whatever he wanted on Skwisgaar, which definitely increased his impatience to get back to their room. "Yeah, I likes thats idea, Skwisgaar," he replied, his grin indicating that he'd at least interpreted things half-correctly. The Shoggies were already rushing up to the bar, announcing their desire for pizzas- it didn't appear that they'd have to hang around the bar for very long. Which was good, as, Toki was definitely ready to head back to their room and discover just what Skwisgaar had in mind.