another horrific phenomenon brought to you by the Baby Sun

[ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com]

Throughout history, many strange and sinister rains had been recorded. Rains of blood, of meat, of frogs. Rains of locusts. Rains of fire and brimstone.

But had there ever been a rain like this?

The grounds of Hogwarts were splattered with a viscous pink goo. Between the falling drops of pinkish sludge, the malevolent Baby Sun's rays continued to shine.

It was a rain of Tubby Custard. The stuff was liquid enough to be drinkable through the straws built into Tubby breakfast bowls, yet thick enough to be called a custard. And it was truly vile. Even Teletubbies, who lived on this pink goo, had been known to experience deep upset and dismay upon witnessing a Tubby Custard mess. There was something about the prospect of uncontrolled Tubby Custard that struck fear into the heart-approximating organ of a Teletubby. How much more should a human fear this glop?

The Baby Sun cooed its delight. Plants, animals, centaurs, buildings, all acquired unsightly splotches of Tubby Custard. The rain continued sporadically as the day wore on, and would not cease until the Baby Sun set for the night.

Comments

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

Okay. Curiosity got the better of Chairman Kaga.

After hearing about this 'Baby Sun', Kaga had to see for himself.

So that's how he found himself outside, staring at horrified fascination at...yes, it was a sun with a baby's head inside it!

What the hell was going on here?

And then the Tubby Tustard started falling.

Scratch that. What the fuck was going on here?

Kaga ran as fast as he could, but as established before he had been a swimmer, not a runner, so by the time he got into the 'sanctuary' of Hogwarts, he was covered in Tubby Tustard and ready to glare at anyone that laughed. And he was sure his clothes were ruined.

[derkhan.livejournal.com]

"What in Jabber's name is going on here?"

Derkhan Blueday stared at the beslimed fellow. "Did it come from ..." She pointed upward. Though the immediate object of her pointing was the indoor ceiling, everyone knew what lay beyond that ceiling, alas.

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

"Yes. Outside," Kaga said through gritted teeth. "That evil sun."

[derkhan.livejournal.com]

"Do you think the Hat has anything to do with it?" Derkhan's first impulse was to blame the government.

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

"He's insane, but not that insane. A close friend of mine said some purple creature predicted this would happen." He looked down at himself in disgust.

[derkhan.livejournal.com]

Derkhan didn't want to touch the pink stuff herself. She was, however, curious. "Does it burn?"

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

"No. It's just disgusting." Kaga was not in a particularly good mood, and playing Twenty Questions with someone was not improving it.

[livingaustria.livejournal.com]

Austria had been hiding in his room the past couple of days, mulling what to do about the Russia problem, as he had termed it in his head. After going nowhere with it, Austria decided fresh air was in order, and headed outside.

He stopped when he opened the door to the outdoors.

"What...who...what...how..."

He was so shocked he couldn't get a sentence out.

[woocha.livejournal.com]

Wishbone, being a dog, lapped at the Tubby Tustard that landed in his hole.

He then promptly ran inside, going Blech! Yuck! That stuff is nasty!

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

They said curiosity killed the cat, but Kuronue was a bat, so he figured it wouldn't hurt to extend a hand out of the nearest window. The Baby Sun was still hovering and giggling every so often, so he only stuck it out as far as necessary, watching it carefully.

He contemplated tasting the pink goo once he'd retracted his arm, but decided against it. It could be poisonous or any number of things.

So he stood staring at his fingers with a confused look for a while, then looked at the downpour of pink goo on the other side of the window. If it had been raining intestines or bile, he wouldn't have been fazed. But this?

It made his stomach turn.

[serrulata.livejournal.com]

Rain of stuff. Lord, as if this week couldn't get any worse. Still, it was something. The congealed pink grossness now doing a nice job of coating the grounds and the greenhouses had put a complete halt to any work today, so Kurama wandered the halls.

He was going to comment on Kuronue's damnable curiosity when the smell hit him. Water or no, the stench of durian lingered.

"Great allmighty gods Kuro, what did you roll in?"

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue turned and glared at Kurama. "Durian," he said simply. Let Kurama think he rolled in it, it was better than being laughed at for being conked in the head with one.

By a human.

By A.

He turned back to the window and shook the goo off his fingers rather franticly. Hoping Kurama would just leave it at that, knowing that he probably wouldn't.

[serrulata.livejournal.com]

Fat chance of that. Kurama knew with no uncertainty that A was the only person in the school who would 1had durian, and only then when he grew it from seed stage. A had probably chucked one of the vile fruit at Kuronue's head, of the faintly visible marks on the bat's temple were any indication. Kurama also knew that A would never do such a thing unless he was provoked.

He smacked the back of Kuronue's head smartly.

"You just have to push it with everyone, don't you," he growled, though more out of habit than any real anger.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue pitched forward a bit then scowled in irritation as he straightened, glowering at Kurama over his shoulder. He might have found his embarrassment amusing, but Kuronue did not.

"I was just testing him. I didn't think he'd throw a fucking durian at me. Shit. It hurt. Those things are huge." He shook his hand a little more viscously, then pulled his hand back in when he realised that it wasn't going to come off easily.

His eyes snapped to the side, and he smirked evilly. Well then, he'd have to wipe it off wouldn't he? Kurama's hair looked like a nice candidate. He'd give him one chance, though, because he felt a little kind today. If he didn't laugh, then he wouldn't get a face full of pink goo. Neither would his hair.

[serrulata.livejournal.com]

Kurama frowned, momentarily forgetting his amusement. A was not the person he wanted Kuronue to fling personality at. In fact, A was probably the very last on the list of people Kuro should be 'testing' at all. He quickly stomped on an evil little thought that reared up from the back of his mind: You're just making yourself angry at him so you don't have to deal with loving him so much. Damn logical mind. Damn it to hell.

"Just testing him, huh? Are you going to do the same thing next time I hold a class, or will my other students remain unharrassed?"

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue turned to face him and considered smothering his face with the pink shit and running like hell if it avoided the subject...but it wouldn't be right.

"Look," he gestured with his hands, splaying them wide. "I get it, you're pissed that I pushed A to see what he was capable of, and yeah, I may have done the same thing with Mello too, but you have to understand where I am coming from here. I'm just-..." making sure they're worthy of you.

He rubbed his forehead, with his unsticky hand, and sighed heavily. "All right. I'll stop it."

[shoggies.livejournal.com]

((How could I resist the Shoggies making a little cameo?))

Several Shoggies squelch onto the grounds, for the Shoggies continue to work on their 'laser tower' project, and they need to find a place to put it. As they leave the school, they take in their surrounded, all covered in the viscous pink substance. There was only one possible reaction to this.

Several Shoggies at Once: "Oh my Great Cthulhoo! WE EXPLODED!"

Several Shoggies swarm back into the school, to report this dreadful turn of events to the other Shoggies. Who had presumably exploded too.

[elfkameo.livejournal.com]

((And speaking of...no. I refuse to say it.))

Kameo also noticed the pink goo, plus how the Shoggies were reacting. So, she did her transformation thing and turned into her Shoggy to join up with the group and figure out just what the fuck was going on.

"Blhhiii." Apparently she hadn't mastered speech with an amorphous mouth yet.

[shoggies.livejournal.com]

There is no sense or order at all to the Shoggies' panicked behavior, and they ooze around haphazardly. Learning they had exploded was a bit much for the Shoggies non-existent minds to comprehend, since they didn't recall doing it. They presume Kameo is simply another Shoggy who must have exploded with the rest of them.

Several Shoggies: "We're all over the place! We exploded! Why did we explode? I don't like exploding!"

It doesn't appear that they will calm down anytime soon. Exploding was traumatic.

[bar-en-lothglor.livejournal.com]

((Glorfy needs a cameo too, since he's so neglected. And he has yet to meet the Shoggies.))

The Elf Lord was perched on the steps leading to the main doors of Hogwarts, busy sketching designs* in a small book as Asfaloth enjoyed stretching his legs and getting to graze out in the yard. When the viscous pink goo began falling, Glorfindel reacted quickly enough to prevent any from splattering him or his book, but his horse unfortunately wasn't so lucky. Asfaloth returned to him looking more pink than white, and wearing an unmistakably indignant expression. Glorfindel did what he could to soothe his horse while wiping the pink glop off, and that was when he noticed the other pink... things... squelching by, seeming panicked.

"Are you injured?" he called after the creatures, naturally concerned about their well-being despite having never met them before. Only Asfaloth's pride seemed to have been injured by the pink goo, but the little pink creatures might have fared worse.

*Some were interpretations of his and Elrond's personal crests combined into one, sort of the Elven equivalent of connecting two sets of initials with a plus sign, within a heart. He would likely tear the pages out later and put them somewhere... secret. Somewhere... safe. So Elrond would not find them. Unless the muns decide he needs to, of course.

[shoggies.livejournal.com]

((*dead of Glorfindel's sketches* This mun thinks that Elrond needs to find them. XD And hopes it's ok that the Shoggies can see Glorfindel's shiny aura. Now for WTF, Shoggy-angst! Who knew it could happen.))

The Shoggies squelch about in their panic-stricken state, but a few of them actually stop when they notice the Elf-Lord. Shoggies, being extra-dimensional creatures, tend to see a bit more than average.

Shoggy 29: "It's sooo shiny! It wants to know if we're injured! Is exploded injured?"

Shoggy 7.1: "We -exploded-! We don't know how! We're splattered all over the place!"

Shoggy 9: "And we're not moving! And you're sooo glowy!"

Shoggy 4 3/4: "Are. . .are we dead? We don't remember exploding! Why aren't we moving?"

The Shoggies actually sound rather traumatized. Usually, the worst that results from a splattered Shoggy is several more Shoggies. But, the Shoggies now behold a landscape covered in something that looks a lot like splattered Shoggy, but disturbingly inert. Shoggy 29 squelches over to a nearby glob of the pink stuff and prods it with a pseudopod.

Shoggy 29: "Wake up Shoggy! Why won't you wake up?"

[bar-en-lothglor.livejournal.com]

((That's fine of course. And Glorfy will be quite mortified if Elrond ever confronts him about the sketches. :D))

Glorfindel smiled at being referred to as 'it', not particularly surprised that the creatures wouldn't know what he was—though they could evidently see his truer form, something which few at Hogwarts seemed capable of. These were clearly not ordinary creatures in any way. "My name is Glorfindel, and I am an Elf," he explained as he knelt down near one of the Shoggies. "May I ask your names? I have never before met anyone quite like yourselves."

He dipped his fingers into a glob of the pink goo, curiously examining its consistency. "I believe this... substance came from the sky," he told the Shoggies, "and not from any of you. It doesn't appear to have ever been sentient or alive, not as you are." He was mostly sure of that, since he couldn't sense any sort of former or dormant vitality within the pink goo, whereas the Shoggies had a distinctly different 'feel' to them, and were quite obviously alive.

Asfaloth was keeping his distance from the Shoggies, and gave a low snort when Glorfindel reached out to the one closest to him. "If any of you are hurt, I may be able to help."

[shoggies.livejournal.com]

((Which means Elrond has to! Perhaps it'll lead to a well-needed chat. =D))

Shoggies never mean any harm by referring to people as 'it'. They are 'its', and unless they were told or picked it up from somewhere, they can't usually figure out gender by looking. Humanoid anatomy is kind of weird, in their opinion, since they are so very describable compared to what Shoggies are used to. Glorfindel is a unique sight, however, since most humanoids are not suffused with a radiant glow. The Shoggies see more glow than Elf, and presume him to be some sort of prettier-than-usual God. As such, they squelch up around him as he kneels down, and listen with rapt attention to his words.

Shoggy 7.1: "We're Shoggies, Master Glorfindel! I'm Shoggy, and that's Shoggy, and that's Shoggy. . ."

Shoggy 7.1 points a pseudopod at all the other Shoggies, a few of whom are still swarming around in a mild panic, but a couple more have gathered to see what is going on.

Shoggy 29: "And that's Shoggy too, but it won't wake up!"

Shoggy 29 and another are still poking at the pink goo, desperately hoping it will wake up like they think it is supposed to. They calm down a bit as Glorfindel explains that the goo has apparently never been alive, and that it came from the sky, and not them.

Shoggy 9: "It. . .just looks like us? It's not a Shoggy too?"

Shoggy 4 3/4: "I hope that it's right! I bet it's right, it seems real smart and it's sooo shiny. We don't want Shoggy to be dead, Master Glorfindel!"

Shoggy 29: "I don't think we're injured, Master Glorfindel! We thought maybe Shoggy was really hurt, but, if it wasn't alive, maybe it's not a Shoggy and just looks like us. Usually if we get splattered we just get up again, and sometimes there's more of us."

Shoggy 7.1: "What's that Master Glorfindel? It's sooo cool. It's kind of like a shantak bird except it's not scaly and doesn't have wings."

Shoggy 7.1 points at Asfaloth with a pseudopod.

Shoggy 9: (to Asfaloth) "Hi there, shantak-with-fur! We're Shoggies. What's your name?"

[bar-en-lothglor.livejournal.com]

((And even more angst, no doubt. XD))

That certainly made it easier to remember all their names. Perhaps they all shared some kind of group conscience as well? He didn't want to potentially insult them by asking, though, so he simply kept his curiosity in that matter to himself.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Shoggies," he said with a nod meant to acknowledge all of them, and even offered a slight bow afterward. "Indeed, this substance surely cannot be a Shoggy like yourselves, for none may die on school grounds. If you're students here, the same protection extends to you all. And I'm pleased to know none of you are injured, then."

Asfaloth tossed his head as he was addressed, and Glorfindel reached up to give him a pat, smiling. "This is Asfaloth; my companion and steed. He is a horse. Where is it that you all come from, if I may ask?" Somewhere without Elves or horses, presumably. He had noticed a very handsome white winged horse in the skies before, but didn't think to mention it, as it hadn't been scaly at all as the shantak birds apparently were.

[igorofmalaria.livejournal.com]

Of course Igor had been walking around outside, still fuming over his ruined experiment.

"GAAAAHHHHH!" echoed through the yard.

Even splattered with noxious goo, he was still determined to get his vial for a sample.