another horrific phenomenon brought to you by the Baby Sun

[ugly-old-hat.livejournal.com]

Throughout history, many strange and sinister rains had been recorded. Rains of blood, of meat, of frogs. Rains of locusts. Rains of fire and brimstone.

But had there ever been a rain like this?

The grounds of Hogwarts were splattered with a viscous pink goo. Between the falling drops of pinkish sludge, the malevolent Baby Sun's rays continued to shine.

It was a rain of Tubby Custard. The stuff was liquid enough to be drinkable through the straws built into Tubby breakfast bowls, yet thick enough to be called a custard. And it was truly vile. Even Teletubbies, who lived on this pink goo, had been known to experience deep upset and dismay upon witnessing a Tubby Custard mess. There was something about the prospect of uncontrolled Tubby Custard that struck fear into the heart-approximating organ of a Teletubby. How much more should a human fear this glop?

The Baby Sun cooed its delight. Plants, animals, centaurs, buildings, all acquired unsightly splotches of Tubby Custard. The rain continued sporadically as the day wore on, and would not cease until the Baby Sun set for the night.

Comments

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

Okay. Curiosity got the better of Chairman Kaga.

After hearing about this 'Baby Sun', Kaga had to see for himself.

So that's how he found himself outside, staring at horrified fascination at...yes, it was a sun with a baby's head inside it!

What the hell was going on here?

And then the Tubby Tustard started falling.

Scratch that. What the fuck was going on here?

Kaga ran as fast as he could, but as established before he had been a swimmer, not a runner, so by the time he got into the 'sanctuary' of Hogwarts, he was covered in Tubby Tustard and ready to glare at anyone that laughed. And he was sure his clothes were ruined.

[derkhan.livejournal.com]

"What in Jabber's name is going on here?"

Derkhan Blueday stared at the beslimed fellow. "Did it come from ..." She pointed upward. Though the immediate object of her pointing was the indoor ceiling, everyone knew what lay beyond that ceiling, alas.

[livingaustria.livejournal.com]

Austria had been hiding in his room the past couple of days, mulling what to do about the Russia problem, as he had termed it in his head. After going nowhere with it, Austria decided fresh air was in order, and headed outside.

He stopped when he opened the door to the outdoors.

"What...who...what...how..."

He was so shocked he couldn't get a sentence out.

[woocha.livejournal.com]

Wishbone, being a dog, lapped at the Tubby Tustard that landed in his hole.

He then promptly ran inside, going Blech! Yuck! That stuff is nasty!

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

"Yes. Outside," Kaga said through gritted teeth. "That evil sun."

[derkhan.livejournal.com]

"Do you think the Hat has anything to do with it?" Derkhan's first impulse was to blame the government.

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

"He's insane, but not that insane. A close friend of mine said some purple creature predicted this would happen." He looked down at himself in disgust.

[derkhan.livejournal.com]

Derkhan didn't want to touch the pink stuff herself. She was, however, curious. "Does it burn?"

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

"No. It's just disgusting." Kaga was not in a particularly good mood, and playing Twenty Questions with someone was not improving it.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

They said curiosity killed the cat, but Kuronue was a bat, so he figured it wouldn't hurt to extend a hand out of the nearest window. The Baby Sun was still hovering and giggling every so often, so he only stuck it out as far as necessary, watching it carefully.

He contemplated tasting the pink goo once he'd retracted his arm, but decided against it. It could be poisonous or any number of things.

So he stood staring at his fingers with a confused look for a while, then looked at the downpour of pink goo on the other side of the window. If it had been raining intestines or bile, he wouldn't have been fazed. But this?

It made his stomach turn.

[serrulata.livejournal.com]

Rain of stuff. Lord, as if this week couldn't get any worse. Still, it was something. The congealed pink grossness now doing a nice job of coating the grounds and the greenhouses had put a complete halt to any work today, so Kurama wandered the halls.

He was going to comment on Kuronue's damnable curiosity when the smell hit him. Water or no, the stench of durian lingered.

"Great allmighty gods Kuro, what did you roll in?"

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue turned and glared at Kurama. "Durian," he said simply. Let Kurama think he rolled in it, it was better than being laughed at for being conked in the head with one.

By a human.

By A.

He turned back to the window and shook the goo off his fingers rather franticly. Hoping Kurama would just leave it at that, knowing that he probably wouldn't.

[serrulata.livejournal.com]

Fat chance of that. Kurama knew with no uncertainty that A was the only person in the school who would 1had durian, and only then when he grew it from seed stage. A had probably chucked one of the vile fruit at Kuronue's head, of the faintly visible marks on the bat's temple were any indication. Kurama also knew that A would never do such a thing unless he was provoked.

He smacked the back of Kuronue's head smartly.

"You just have to push it with everyone, don't you," he growled, though more out of habit than any real anger.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue pitched forward a bit then scowled in irritation as he straightened, glowering at Kurama over his shoulder. He might have found his embarrassment amusing, but Kuronue did not.

"I was just testing him. I didn't think he'd throw a fucking durian at me. Shit. It hurt. Those things are huge." He shook his hand a little more viscously, then pulled his hand back in when he realised that it wasn't going to come off easily.

His eyes snapped to the side, and he smirked evilly. Well then, he'd have to wipe it off wouldn't he? Kurama's hair looked like a nice candidate. He'd give him one chance, though, because he felt a little kind today. If he didn't laugh, then he wouldn't get a face full of pink goo. Neither would his hair.

[serrulata.livejournal.com]

Kurama frowned, momentarily forgetting his amusement. A was not the person he wanted Kuronue to fling personality at. In fact, A was probably the very last on the list of people Kuro should be 'testing' at all. He quickly stomped on an evil little thought that reared up from the back of his mind: You're just making yourself angry at him so you don't have to deal with loving him so much. Damn logical mind. Damn it to hell.

"Just testing him, huh? Are you going to do the same thing next time I hold a class, or will my other students remain unharrassed?"

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue turned to face him and considered smothering his face with the pink shit and running like hell if it avoided the subject...but it wouldn't be right.

"Look," he gestured with his hands, splaying them wide. "I get it, you're pissed that I pushed A to see what he was capable of, and yeah, I may have done the same thing with Mello too, but you have to understand where I am coming from here. I'm just-..." making sure they're worthy of you.

He rubbed his forehead, with his unsticky hand, and sighed heavily. "All right. I'll stop it."

[serrulata.livejournal.com]

"Mello deserves it," Kurama said, almost automatically. He smiled a little, forcing himself back into good humor. Without knowing Kuronue's mind, he almost wished he'd get a facefull of the stuff, just to give him an excuse to run the bat down just like old times. A dangerous thought.

"He's a jackass, just like you. I figured you two would hit it off splendidly."

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

He looked at his hand thoughtfully at the veiled insult, then to Kurama with a pleasant smile. "Oh, we did. I assure you."

"Still," he said casually, taking a step closer. "I bet I'm a bigger 'jackass'."

Without another word he thrust his hand in Kurama's face and smeared the remnants of the pink goo from Kurama's cheek into his hair. Then ran as fast as he could down the hall. He laughed all the way.

[serrulata.livejournal.com]

Kurama sputtered and then snarled incoherently, getting the stuff out of his eye and then tearing after Kuronue with an abandon that was almost instinctive. First I'll tie him up, he thought viciously. then I'll dangle him outside and see if he catches on fire. Then I'll roll him in pink stuff and durian and LEAVE him there.

[prettypendulum.livejournal.com]

Kuronue swore loudly when he noticed Kurama was chasing after him. Fuck. Damn fox instincts always fucked him over in this part in the past.

"Higher ground, higher ground, shit..." He skidded around a corner and struggled to keep his balance as he took off again. There weren't any windows large enough for him to squeeze through here, he'd have to run until he found somewhere he could loose him or get out of reach.

He grinned, looking over his shoulder at Kurama. Oh, he got him gooood. He laughed a little harder.

[derkhan.livejournal.com]

Unfortunately, Kaga had run into an investigative reporter. More questions could be expected, until his surliness marked him as utterly uncooperative. As yet, he was still providing information of a sort.

"The campus needs to know as much about this as possible." It was the goad to her long-dormant plans. She'd meant to create a Hogwarts counterpart to Runagate Rampant. Now seemed an optimal time. "It's an experience we all can feel for ourselves, unfortunately. But we need to know what it's going to do to us ... what it's going to do to the community." Worried, she squinted at the pink stuff on Kaga. "Do you know of any scientists in the community who aren't in the pay of the government?"

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

"No." Ah, but he's only answering the bare minimum so he can get out of there and run to the nearest bath.

[derkhan.livejournal.com]

Derkhan shook her head. She should've expected tight-lipped suspicion from any denizen of this fucked-up bureaucratic hellhole. "It's okay," she tried to tell him. "It's all off the record. Everything is off the record. I don't name names."

[gourmetchairman.livejournal.com]

"No, I mean it. I don't know any scientists. You'd be better off asking in Ravenclaw."

[derkhan.livejournal.com]

She gave him a brisk nod. "Thanks for the lead." Debated giving him a name; decided against it; decided, likewise, against asking for his; was gone.