hh_mirror | A whole barrel of it ((Closed, Kusuriyuri/Kurama))

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A whole barrel of it ((Closed, Kusuriyuri/Kurama))

Kurama was sure that one of the reasons he didn't like gods and tended to try and stay away from them was because, for some inexplicable reason, they liked to use him as a little cat-toy. Bat him around a little here, let him think he's free for a minute, then start chewing on his head for a while.

It's starting to get old, and the string of his patience has been growing short. He was sick of working in the greenhouses, bored of staying in his office or his room, and not yet intrigued enough to start really exploring the castle. What he wanted now was to be around someone calming.

Kusuriyuri, of course, was the calmest person he knew. Kurama also adored spending time with him, so it was in search of the Medicine Peddler he went, first deciding to check his office.

He paused at the door and knocked politely, in case any students were in or Kusuriyuri was busy.

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Kusuriyuri rose from the low desk where his books and notes were laid out in neat disorder. He knew Kurama was at the door and he could have just called to him. Instead, he went, opened the door. "Okairi, shirogitsune," he said softly, stepping back a little so Kurama could enter. He knew there were things still troubling Kurama, things that the kitsune was still working through, that he was trying to avoid. But, he also knew the kitsune was working through them, slowly. He wouldn't push yet. "Would you care for some tea?"

"I would," he smiled, leaning to press a kiss to Kusuriyuri's cheek. "Tadaima." Already he felt much calmer, as if just the act of walking through the door helped him to cast off his disturbance.

It was foolish perhaps, but the greeting, the gentle kiss warmed Kusuriyuri, bringing a soft smile to his lips as he prepared the tea, just a simple sencha for them both. "How has your day been?" he asked, setting out the cups and serving ware while the tea steeped. "Is all well?"

"It has been a day. I am learning to not worry so much about things that I cannot change, and to accept them." He ducked his head, not losing his little smile. "And you? Has your day been well?"

"It has been full of study, remembering what was once known, learning new things. It is well spent," Kusuriyuri said easily. He poured the tea. "Shirogitsune seemed concerned with something when he stood outside," he ventured, not quite asking, but opening the door for Kurama to talk with him if he wished.

"That is good to hear," he said, accepting his cup. "I will observe your next class, but I do not think I will have time to completely attend... I must try and build a lesson plan of my own." He took a sip, savored the taste, and smiled.

"That is understandable," Kusuriyuri murmured, taking a sip of his own tea. He met Kurama's eyes and very gently added, "It, however, does not explain what troubles Shirogitsune."

Kurama laughed weakly and his shoulders slumped.
"How is it that you can tell so easily?" he sighed.

Kusuriyuri moved closer to Kurama, gently brushing each part as he spoke about it. "Your eyes tell me you are concerned. Your smile shows me there is something on your mind. Your energy," he touched Kurama just over his heart, "tells me you were concerned before you entered the room and that you are somewhat soothed within." He left his hand on Kurama's heart. "Or, that I love you and can see your truth, Kurama."

"I especially like the sound of that last part," he smiled, taking Kusuriyuri's hand in his own. He took a breath, then told Kusuriyuri about the day... his conversations with L and Yukimura, finishing with a grimace on his face as he recounted Yukimura's parting shot.

Kusuriyuri listened, both to what Kurama said and how it affected the flow of energy around him. He continued to listen after Kurama stopped talking. "As for L, I did attempt to warn you, but I also believed that it was more important to deshi's safety and those around him that you continue his training. I shall speak with L again, if you desire it. What disturbs you more, Shirogitsune, that Yukimura was correct or your own curiosity?"

"I had a feeling speaking to L would be playing with fire, I am sure we will have words again in the future. As for the rest..." he shrugged helplessly. "You know me, I hate not knowing things - especially if they relate to me or something I may have done."

Kusuriyuri regarded Kurama a long moment. "If Shirogitsune does not wish to discuss what disturbs him, he may say so," he said softly. "Partial truths are not beneficial."

Kurama did wince that time. He squeezed Kusuriyuri's hand and tried not to look down or away.

"I'm sorry, I... I am troubled because so much of me is still so connected to my old life, and any connection here I instantly latch on to. I am also troubled because Yukimura is so very good at making me feel bad about myself."

Kusuriyuri drew Kurama closer, holding him close. "Shirogitsune lost much when he came to the human world, and again when he came here." He thought a moment more. "As I recall, kitsune are social creatures, needing the comfort of a group." He ran his fingers through Kurama's hair. "I do not think it is so much that Yukimura makes you feel bad as that he focuses what you are feeling, perhaps?"

"Probably," he mumbled, burying his face in Kusuriyuri's shoulder. Though Yukimura sure did know how to bury the knife in deep, sometimes. "Most likely. He is a good friend, he knows how I think even though we've only known each other a short time," he turned his head so he could look up into Kusuriyuri's face, and smiled. "Though not as well as you."

"He is perceptive," Kusuriyuri murmured, continuing to stroke Kurama's hair. "I think perhaps you two are not dissimilar. Both of you think constantly, puzzling out what you will do, reaching answers based on what you observe before you fully know it." He smiled and gently kissed Kurama. "In knowing you, I have an advantage," he admitted softly.

He knew it was meant to comfort, but Kurama felt his heart sink just a little nonetheless.
"Please don't... don't think of it as advantages or disadvantages. I love you. I maybe could have loved him, but... not like this."

Kusuriyuri blinked once. "I do not doubt you love me, Kurama. There are many types of love, Shirogitsune." He caressed Kurama's cheek. "I do not feel as if I am in competition with anyone, nor do I feel you must only love me." He thought a moment. "I love deshi. Does this disturb you, Shirogitsune?"

"No, not at all, that's not what I..." he sighed and leaned once again against Kusuriyuri, wrapping his arms around his waist. "I think maybe I should stop trying to talk myself around things that have a path right through them."

Kusuriyuri held Kurama close. "It is part of who you are, Shirogitsune." He ran his fingers through the silvering hair. "You seek all the paths, trying to plan ahead many steps beyond the present. It has served you well in the past, but it becomes a hindrance when actions and decisions must be made in the short term." There was no judgment in his tone, only acceptance of who and what Kurama was.

"This place makes it very difficult to stay ten steps ahead of everything else," he said, the beginning of a laugh building behind the words. "I never know what will happen."

"And, in some cases, that is very good," Kusuriyuri teased Kurama lightly. He placed a kiss on Kurama's forehead. "In some cases, it can be frustrating. But, it is what is," he said softly.

"It makes things more interesting, at least," he smiled, returning the kiss. He sat up, still holding Kusuriyuri lightly, and took a breath.
"I think that is enough melancholy from me. Are you too terribly busy today?"

"Nothing that will not wait," Kusuriyuri replied. "Mostly just remembering what was known. What is it you would wish of me?"

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