If the Invisible Man sends owls, would he write in Invisible Ink?

[invisibleclaude.livejournal.com]

(The note is unsigned, but written in a scrawl that may be familiar to Noah.)

Noah

Bennet,

Suppose you had something to do with the bleeding hat putting me in a dorm covered in pink? Don't worry - you won't find me there. Or anywhere else. So rest easy, mate. Just go about your life and don't think about the blood on your hands.



Sandra,

Do me a favor. Play this for your husband.

(Enclosed is a CD of the best of Andrew Lloyd Webber.)

Comments

Return owl

[invisibleclaude.livejournal.com]

Nah. Throwing the bones on the floor in the normal tradition would probably mess up her pretty kitchen. Besides, the era you're looking for is the Revolutionary War.

Mate, I always thought you were a bit slow. Good egg, but slow. Now you're just a bastard and slow.

Return owl

[familyman-hrg.livejournal.com]

I take it you want eggs, then. Too bad they're more of a breakfast food.

Return owl

[invisibleclaude.livejournal.com]

Right, and I know how much you like to obey the letter of the law. Not a drop of rebel blood in Mrs. Bennet's son, that's for sure.

Return owl

[familyman-hrg.livejournal.com]

Wonderful. Should I ask Sandra to make chocolate pancakes and hash browns too? Oh, I know, let's have pizza and sushi as well. We can mix it all together and eat it with no utensils, out of respect for your metal allergy.

Return owl

[invisibleclaude.livejournal.com]

Oh, yeah, sounds great. Maybe some cold cereal and a bit of blow it out your ass, fuckface?

Return owl

[familyman-hrg.livejournal.com]

Real mature, there, Claude. Reallly, I've heard Lyle come up with better.

Return owl

[invisibleclaude.livejournal.com]

Sorry. My skills at witty back and forth seem to fade when I'm talking with someone I don't give a crap about. Also, I hope Sandra likes the necklace.

Return owl

[familyman-hrg.livejournal.com]

You're going through an awful lot of effort to send owl mail to people you don't give a crap about. I'd rather you tried to get your people skills back by Sunday. I'd hate to upset Sandra.

You son of a bitch.

Return owl

[invisibleclaude.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm actually really bored. And this bleeding owl keeps coming back, so I figure, what the hell? And Sandra likes me just as I am, friend. Won't change a thing. I think she'll enjoy hearing stories of our times together.

She's already going to be wondering about the CDs. You're welcome, by the way.

Careful, mate, that's my mum you're talking about. Not my fault I just know how to treat a woman.

Re: Return owl

[familyman-hrg.livejournal.com]

CDs?

I really didn't want to know that about you and your mother, Claude.

Return owl

[invisibleclaude.livejournal.com]

Ask your wife.

Not what I meant and you know it, bloody pervert.

Return owl

[familyman-hrg.livejournal.com]

You remembered didn't have to do that. I'd apologize for the Carousel CD but she meant well.

Next time don't make it so easy, then.

Return owl

[invisibleclaude.livejournal.com]

Of course I remembered, how could I not? Yeah, well. How else were you going to ride off to drag another innocent person to their vivisection if you didn't have your road trip music?

Eh, what can you do? Besides, June is Busting Out All Over is a classic.

You just have your mind in the gutter.

Return owl

[familyman-hrg.livejournal.com]

Thanks. The cover got torn on the old one and I don't know, maybe I could haul you along and you could talk them to death first, as a mercy killing.

Return owl

[invisibleclaude.livejournal.com]

Yeah, your son, Sandra told me. God, your son. I'd forgotten My dazzling conversational skills are killer, I know, but if you think that I miss riding around with you am going to ever get in a car with you again, you're smoking something.

Return owl

[familyman-hrg.livejournal.com]

I know, all those years of nothing and then Yes, because every time I get in a car with someone I have to shoot them. I don't know how my kids have survived my taking them to school for so long. I (Here there is a few words' worth of scribbles obscuring the rest of this.)

Return owl

[invisibleclaude.livejournal.com]

I knew you'd be a great dad, you Hey, how do I know it hasn't become a habit? Maybe it's just people who consider you a brother a partner? Or possibly only on bridges? Too risky, mate, sorry.

Re: Return owl

[familyman-hrg.livejournal.com]

...thanks. Really. Ah yes, the siren song of bridges. Because Lord knows I can't drive over one without the urge to shoot everything that moves with absolutely no provocation.

Return owl

[invisibleclaude.livejournal.com]

Well, you managed not to kill Claire in the first week, so it was a pretty safe bet. See, and here all this time I'd thought it was me. Should have known it was the damn bridge.

Oh, yeah, and the fact that you're a bastard. That point can't be forgotten.

Return owl

[familyman-hrg.livejournal.com]

I think a lot of that might have been her and Sandra's doing more than mine. You were what Well, it's not like you're going to let anyone forget it. I might as well start making business cards.

Re: Return owl

[invisibleclaude.livejournal.com]

What what? Oh, that'll be charming. 'Noah Bennet. Bounty man and all round bastard. Call for vivisection pick-up service. Does not do bridges.'