The Old Man, Legend of Zelda

[eastmostdodongo.livejournal.com]

1. What is your favorite cheese? Why is it your favorite?

EASTMOST PENINSULA IS THE SECRET

2. Who would you kill first, Barney or Carrottop?

SPECTACLE ROCK IS AN ENTRANCE TO DEATH

3. What time is it where you are?

10TH ENEMY HAS THE BOMB

4. If you were Albus Dumbledore returned from the dead, which member of the Order of the Phoenix would you sexually harass? How would you harass them? If you are Albus Dumbledore, please answer as if you were Sirius Black.

SHOW THIS TO THE OLD WOMAN

5. If you are pushing to be in:

A. Slytherin - please state the clever, witty name of the bar in which you bartend, in the dark.

THERE ARE SECRETS WHERE FAIRIES DON'T LIVE

B. Gryffindor – Debate whether Harry should ultimately end up married to Fred or George. Use examples from a variety of world mythologies to bolster your argument.

ONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE THE TRIFORCE CAN'T GO IN

C. Ravenclaw – You guys are supposed to be smart. Explain why my desk is inundated with paperwork at all times, even though I’m constantly disposing of it.

DID YOU GET THE SWORD FROM THE OLD MAN AT THE TOP OF THE WATERFALL?

D. Hufflepuff – Prove you are not useless.

DODONGO DISLIKES SMOKE

6. Offer a bribe to the members of this community so that they will not squib you. Items used in bribery do not necessarily have to belong to the person offering the bribe. Do not threaten us rather than offering a bribe. A threat indicates you either don't really want to be here, or don't have enough sense to answer the question properly. The hat will automatically squib you, regardless of other votes, if you do.

IT'S DANGEROUS TO GO ALONE! TAKE THIS! *holds up a rusty sword*

Please state, in the subject line, your name and the fandom you've come from, and tag your application with the 'application' tag.

In conjunction with posting your character's application, you must include the following statement, replacing the blanks with your initials (or your Net handle, or your character's initials, or anyone's initials!) after each sentence to indicate that you have read our rules and agree to abide by them:

"I have read the hogwarts_hocus faq, and understand it is a crazy, cracktastic sorting community and RPG. DODONGO DISLIKES SMOKE
I have read the hogwarts_hocus rules and agree to abide by each and every one of them. DODONGO DISLIKES SMOKE.
I agree to be a good sport and not get my knickers in a bunch. DODONGO DISLIKES SMOKE.
One day, marmalade will rule the world. DODONGO DISLIKES SMOKE"

Comments

[eastmostdodongo.livejournal.com]

The Old Man nodded, now aware of his faux pas. "MASTER USING IT AND YOU CAN HAVE THIS."

[homsarhomsar.livejournal.com]

Homsar's bowler hat had just shot way up into the air, and now it paused at the apex of its trajectory.

The Old Man seemed to be offering him something. Could it be???

Hopefully, Homsar asked, "DaaaAAAAaaaAAAAaaaAAAA! When can we start the Jeffersons? (http://www.homestarrunner.com/sadjournal/homsar_jeff.mp3)"

[eastmostdodongo.livejournal.com]

"DID YOU GET THE SWORD FROM THE OLD MAN ON TOP OF THE WATERFALL?," the Old Man asked gravely.

[homsarhomsar.livejournal.com]

Pshaw. Homsar had done that ages ago. It still hadn't brought the Jeffersons closer to fruition. But maybe the Old Man knew something he didn't? Homsar decided to answer his question, plain and simple.

"DaaaAAAAaaaAAAAaaaAAAA! I'm stickin' it to the man! Kashooooooooo!"

[eastmostdodongo.livejournal.com]

Gasp! Could this be...


The One?

"ONE WHO DOES NOT HAVE THE TRIFORCE CAN'T GO IN," the Old Man said hopefully.

[homsarhomsar.livejournal.com]

The triforce?! Homsar had only the Jengaforce! He had thought that was enough. Forlornly, he replied, "I do what I'm told...."

[eastmostdodongo.livejournal.com]

How strange, the Old Man was sure Homsar had the Triforce... Was it something else? More importantly, was that something else enough?

"TAKE ANY ROAD YOU WANT?," he inquired.

[homsarhomsar.livejournal.com]

Homsar would remain true his word. "I'll take the road less gravelled," he informed the Old Man. And then, to emphasize, he added firmly, "Kashooooooooo!"

[eastmostdodongo.livejournal.com]

It might... It might just work.

The Old Man held up a DVD (http://ec2.images-amazon.com/images/P/B000068V9X.01._AA240_SCLZZZZZZZ_.jpg).

"IT'S DANGEROUS TO GO ALONE! TAKE THIS."

But... would he be able to play it?

Vote: Ravenclaw, with THE JEFFERSONS OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[homsarhomsar.livejournal.com]

No...

IMPOSSIBLE.

Homsar gaped.

It was the holy grail. The one thing Homsar wanted the most in the world.

Even more than Jenga.

For a while, he was speechless. Then, even though he lacked visible arms, he somehow pulled the DVD over to himself. And that's when he realized the problem.

He had the Jeffersons now. And he knew Sirius would start it with him. But...how could he start it? He stared at it for a moment, willing it to do something, but...it just sat there. No George. No Weezy. Not even Ralph the doorman!

Homsar sighed silently, his mouth opening even wider.

Well, he was sure he could figure that out. He was good at puzzles. And games. Especially games.

And he was eager to do it as soon as possible. He quickly cast his vote for The Old Man and blibbled the fuck right out of there to work on starting the Jeffersons, OMG YAY!!!!!!

Re: Vote: Ravenclaw, with THE JEFFERSONS OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[eastmostdodongo.livejournal.com]

"PATRA HAS THE MAP," the Old Man intoned at the retreating Homsar.

Could he do it? Could he start the Jeffersons? Only time would tell.

Re: Vote: Ravenclaw, with THE JEFFERSONS OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[homsarhomsar.livejournal.com]

Homsar heard this advice and stored it away inside the white matter that was his brain. Patra. He would have to find a board game piece named Patra. And then he'd finally get his piece of the pie.