With a smirk, he summoned up the finest cheese fez in all of Hogwart's collective memory. The sides were perfectly angled, sculpted pieces of aged gouda, the top of Swiss, and the tassel. The tassel was sparkly, gold, and rivaled all known tassels.

It also helped that the brunette wearing said cheese fez was bearing a tray of crackers and wine for later consumption of the fez. "Functional and tasty."