It was more effort than he could give right now to keep from crying, and the last person he wanted to cry in front of was Kuronue. But this was his human body, with a human brain and a human heart and all the mixed-up, conflicting, horrible emotions that went with it. And the mad insane other demon part of him was of the sudden violently bright mindset that it wasn't selfish if he had Kuronue and Kusuriyuri, but balanced and well-deserved.

He'd wanted others, of course, but he needed them. He'd go mad if either of them were to suddenly disappear, but having Kuronue so close and not doing anything about it was far worse. He wouldn't want anyone else if he had them.

"I don't understand," he muttered, pressing his forehead to Kuronue's, holding him like a lifeline. His cheeks were wet and hot and he hated the feeling of crying, but hated more the idea of letting go for now.