"Oh! You came without knowing you need to bribe people!"

Which was why he had depleted uranium with him, of course. Perhaps he was a chemist transported in the middle of an experiment.

"Well, I shall not require a bribe from you then.I would like to know why you signed yourself as 'Pollution', however. Oh, forgive me- are you an athromorphic personification, like Simkin? He's the personification of magic."