[identity profile] dib-worm.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] hh_mirror
((OOC Note: Continuing from this earlier post. We opted to finish this over IRC.))



ZIM: The piggy is batted out of Zim's hands, but swiftly replaced with another from the Pak. Zim shakes it menacingly in Dib's direction, squeaking it in his mighty iron grip. "Foolish huuuuuuman! You have not yet begun to taste the wrath of ZIM! This 'Dutch Elm' cannot compare to the might of the Irken Empire! HWAH!" Zim heaves the piggy at Dib.

Dib: ...Which Dib dodges, with a stifled "HEY!" and "Enough with the PIGS already!" The piggy squeaks to the floor somewhere beside him. Dib stallks forward again, lean and pointy, and eyes Zim. "So, are you going to TELL me what your latest plan to take over the school is or do I have to give you ideas for it again, because as FUN as all this is, I have a SOCIAL LIFE now and sitting here BICKERING is cutting into it."

ZIM: "YOU? A SOCIAL life?" Zim gives Dib an incredibly bizarre look before slipping into spiteful laughter. "YOU? A SOCIAL LIFE? YOU? *YOU*?" While laughing, Zim stretches his legs out to keep a small, but noticeable height advantage on Dib.

Dib: Dib is nonplussed, even smirks back- a distinctly unsettling smile that's an unconscious mirror of the ones worn by his new friends- like Nny and Gogo Yubari. "Yes, ME, Zim. *I* have a social life here. Being here's been GOOD for me, and I'm actually LEARNING things." He reaches out and pokes Zim in the tiny (incredibly tiny!) chest. "What have YOU been doing with the time here? I haven't seen any giant robots, or magical demons, or even BUNNIES!"

ZIM: "HA!" Zim bats Dib's hand away with as much disdain as possible. "You cannot fool me with your lies, human. The Dibworm with a" Zim spits the word out, "*social* life? People actually *liking* you? Nice try, Dib, but you won't trick me so easily." Zim tries to look regal. "And my plans for this puny planet are coming to fruition as we SPEAK! I guess you've been too busy with your 'social life'"

ZIM: Zim emphasizes the words with finger quotations, "to notice."

Dib: "Uh-HUH," Dib counters. "Trust me, I'd KNOW if you were ACTUALLY up to something." He sniffs the air. "I can SMELL your evil plans- and they smell like HOT AIR to me... and WHY exactly is it so HARD TO BELIEVE that someone could actually LIKE me, huh? This isn't LIKE back home."

ZIM: Zim stares at Dib and says in a perfectly normal, casual tone, "Well, there is your head." Without skipping a beat, Zim goes right back to psychotic screaming. "WHAT KNOW YOU OF THE HOT AIR PROJECT? TELL ME!!!"

Dib: Dib starts laughing. "Oh, I know PLENTY, Zim. PLEEEEEENNN-TEE." He figures he can take a random guess about this and PROBABLY be at least 40% right... "But it won't work, because no matter how many MIRRORS you try to hide around campus, it never gets above 60 degrees inside!"

ZIM: Zim glares at him suspiciously. But how? He'd hidden all the mirrors with the latest in camoflauge technology! No one would suspect the moose of hiding a mirror. But he couldn't let Dib know of this! "Wrong, *stupid* human. There are no 'mirrors' involved in my ingenious plaaan." Again the casual tone. "60 degrees, you said?"

Dib: "Sometimes 62, but that's it. The walls are solid STONE, Zim, and older than YOU." He crosses his arms over his chest and smirks, amused that a random guess hit that close to the mark- he'd almost be FOND of Zim's predictability if he didn't, y'know, DISLIKE him. "And if you -really- don't believe I have friends," He pauses to laugh internally, "I'll be HAPPY to INTRODUCE YOU. Because they know ALL ABOUT YOU. And SOME of them play with KNIVES."

ZIM: "Pff, knives." Zim waves off the statement. "Pitiful human playthings. A great Irken warrior such as myself has no fear of such primitive threats." Zim tries to recall exactly what constituted a human knife. If he remembered right, they had soft blunt edges and spread butter on toast. He points at Dib and shrieks. "You will NEVER SPREAD THE GREAT IRKEN EMPIRE, HUMAN!"

Dib: "Uhm, no. That's YOUR job? Sometimes I just can't follow the BROKEN CROCKERY that is your BRAIN, Zim." Leans forward again. Voice low and honestly a little CREEPY. "You used to be pretty scared BEFORE... when I'd talk about cutting you open... s'matter, you think I forgot about that? How do you think that'd happen? With KNIVES, Zim. Sharp, pointy, SHARP knives..." Oh man, he HAS been hanging around the psychopuffs too long. "There's a place just outside campus. A little hut. Not very remarkable. But there's a BIG TABLE in the middle of it and SOMEDAY I'm going to see you ON that table."

ZIM: "HA!" Zim looks unimpressed. "I only looked *worried* because you're quite obviously *insane*, possibly because of all the empty space around your brain." Zim pauses for a moment, proud of his zing, then regains his train of thought. "And honestly Dib, how many times have you *tried* to capture me with your dumb parachute gadgets and FAILED?"

Dib: "Paranormal," Dib corrects automatically, a hint of eye-rolling accompanying the word. "And that was when I had INFERIOR EQUIPMENT to work with. That's all CHANGED now. I have friends, and I have REAL POWER here. You can laugh it off all you want, but there are spells that KILL. Instantly. With a WORD. There are spells that can produce UNENDING PAIN. And... y'know, make you really itchy and stuff. I'm not sure which is worse, really. Being really itchy is pretty horrible." He neglects to mention the school's no-kill field- that'd just take all the fun right out of it!

ZIM: "Yeah, being itchy is pretty horrible." Zim nods and says calmly before snapping right back into yelling. "Oh, it wasn't just your equipment that was inferior, Dibthing. It's your ugly, smelly, human...face that's inferior!" Another classic zing. Go Zim. "Evem with all this 'power' that you have now," Zim *really* overemphasizes the sarcasm on the word, "you'll never be able to stop me, or my plans to rule this filthy planet."

Dib: Dib raises an eyebrow. "Oh REALLY. Tell you what, Zim... I DARE you. Take over the campus by the end of this week."

ZIM: "I don't need your puny human DARES. They're probably riddled with DISEASE." Zim waggles his fingers at Dib menacingly. "And taking over this school will so easy that a smeet could do it. Just watch."

Dib: Dib pushes back the sleeve of his shirt and looks at his watch. "You have a week. Better get MOVING!"

ZIM: "HA! I already have an *ingenius* plan in motion, one that will leave you all TREMBLING IN FEAR BEFORE THE ALMIGHTY ZIM!

ZIM: " Zim holds his hands above his head triumphantly.

Dib: Dib laughs. "Mmhmm. When the week's up and you've totally LOST, AGAIN, I'll owl you to collect the..." Pause. What small petty insulting thing can he demand of Zim here? "... week's worth of candy you'll owe me for LOSING. AGAIN."

ZIM: "And when you and all humanity tremble at my feet as the pathetic slaves you were meant to be, you will RUE THE DAY YOU DOUBTED ZIM!" Zim gives Dib an intense pointing. "RUE IT!"

Dib: "Uhuh. Sure. Whatever. IF you manage to ACTUALLY SUCCEED, then yeah, I'll be your slave- but you WON'T. So I'm not worried." He grins broadly and waves, turning to go. Yup. Same old Zim. Some things don't change...

ZIM: "Prepare for your lifetime of slaving, Dibstink!" Zim shakes his fist at Dib as he goes. "It will...be...very unpleasant! UNPLEASANT!"

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